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What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/28/2006 4:32:17 PM   
PookBaccus


Posts: 38
Joined: 3/22/2006
Status: offline 		What motivates you to be Dominant?
What needs are fulfilled by being Dominant?
Where does it come from?
What facets of your personality are you portraying thru dominance / what facets are being hidden?
Is fear a factor?
Why did you read this and choose not to answer?

I here inquiring Doms and subs Really Really wanna know.
PookBaccus

< Message edited by PookBaccus -- 3/28/2006 4:48:04 PM >
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/28/2006 5:25:10 PM   
MrThorns


Posts: 919
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PookBaccus

What motivates you to be Dominant?
  Genetics
quote:


What needs are fulfilled by being Dominant?
  Most all of them
quote:


Where does it come from?
Genetics
quote:


What facets of your personality are you portraying thru dominance / what facets are being hidden?
  None. /  None.
quote:

Is fear a factor?
No.
quote:

Why did you read this and choose not to answer?

See answers above.

~Thorns

_____________________________

~"Do you know what the chain of command is? Its the chain I beat ya with when ya don't follow my command."

"My inner child is a mean little fucker"

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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/28/2006 6:00:39 PM   
PlayfulOne


Posts: 1047
Status: offline 		I just am.

I am fullfilled by being who I am

K

(in reply to PookBaccus)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/28/2006 6:59:26 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PookBaccus

What motivates you to be Dominant?

A spiritual calling.

quote:

What needs are fulfilled by being Dominant?

My need to be Served, to have SM, to grow Spiritually and, sometimes, to have Sex. I find that I can have all separately, but when two or more are combined, it’s more meaningful. When all are combined and it clicks, it damn near blows my mind.

quote:

Where does it come from?

From within.

quote:

What facets of your personality are you portraying thru dominance / what facets are being hidden?

All of them / only the ones I hide from myself (working on uncovering those).

quote:

Is fear a factor?

Fear is a factor in almost everything, lifestyle or otherwise. If we are not acting out of Love, we are acting out of Fear. They are opposites.

Fire

< Message edited by MasterFireMaam -- 3/28/2006 7:00:02 PM >

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to PookBaccus)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/28/2006 7:04:12 PM   
amayos


Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline
What motivates me to be dominant? Perhaps my penchant for sadism—though I feel this is a symptom of a deeper root. One does what one is, ultimately.

Is it need or desire?

And where does it all come from? I have my theories, the foremost something to do about the veneer civilization puts over our animality...

(in reply to PookBaccus)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/28/2006 7:17:17 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		Because I am, nothing more, nothing less, not to be--is not to be.

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to PookBaccus)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/28/2006 11:44:37 PM   
CanadianGuy


Posts: 219
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos
And where does it all come from? I have my theories, the foremost something to do about the veneer civilization puts over our animality...

Bang on, brother.  I believe we are natural, instinct-driven creatures, evolving from other animals to the point where we're "advanced" and "civilized" enough to try and pretend we're something else.  Sorry, but we're just naughty horny instinctual creatures with slightly bigger brains.  I like how you think.

As for me, I'm dominant because it's what feels right to me, deep inside myself, from where I can't think, reason, or be influenced by "society".  I crave control and power over a younger, weaker, submissive female mate.  Having found one that fits that description has fulfilled many of my needs.  That she is beautiful, fun, and most of all has reciprocal desires (craves a stronger, older, dominant male mate) is icing.  And to have connected the way we have... has changed my life.

I would never, ever go back to trying to fit my natural self into society's disturbing man-made ideals for human sexuality.

(in reply to amayos)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/29/2006 12:40:14 AM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PookBaccus

What motivates you to be Dominant?
Basic, primal instincts.  I am more than a bit feral.

What needs are fulfilled by being Dominant?
The deep, dark, subconscious, forbidden ones.

Where does it come from?
One theory is the reptile brain, the most primitive part of our brains.

What facets of your personality are you portraying thru dominance / what facets are being hidden?
The basic motivations of power, control, authority and creativitiy.

Is fear a factor?
No.  Only to fools who anger Me.

Why did you read this and choose not to answer?

N/A

PookBaccus




_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to PookBaccus)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/29/2006 5:24:51 AM   
Cloudz


Posts: 836
Joined: 9/13/2005
Status: offline 		It is who I am

_____________________________

Enjoy the Journey,
~Cloudz

"Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."


(in reply to PookBaccus)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/29/2006 12:37:55 PM   
Ceyx


Posts: 89
Joined: 8/23/2005
Status: offline 		Rather than claim that dominance is mysterious and ineffable, I'll try to answer these questions as clearly as possible from my own experience.

quote:

What motivates you to be Dominant?


I'm motivated by the deep sense of satisfaction and fulfillment that I take from my relationship with my slave girl. I'm also motivated by my love for her. I'm dominant because I feel most complete and most myself when I'm living this way; at the same time I'm spurred by the fact that in expressing this part of myself, I can give my miss a secure and happy place in the world.

quote:

What needs are fulfilled by being Dominant?


Most basically, the need to have someone -- completely, inescapably. Someone to live close to my heart, who delights me and who devotes herself to delighting me. Someone who flowers in the light of my vision for her. Who responds to my passions. Miss fulfills my sexual desires as well-- for control, for the exercise of force, for pain-- but as needs they are secondary to the need for ownership and close companionship.

quote:

Where does it come from?


I can't answer this ontologically, but I can answer it historically. I've always had forced sex fantasies; everything that has most aroused me has involved assault or some form of sexual control. I've always been very possessive in my relationships with women, to the point of making their friendships difficult, and I've felt badly about this. I've always been very ready with advice. It wasn't until I met miss, however-- until we became friends, and then lovers, and sorted through our desires-- that I saw a pattern in the things that had always fascinated, pleased or compelled me. With her, that star-field of life experiences came to make sense as a constellation, figuring dominance.

quote:

What facets of your personality are you portraying thru dominance / what facets are being hidden?


I don't feel as if I need to hide any facet of my personality with miss. One of my rules for her is that she be open and honest with me, and I return that honesty so far as I'm able. What are the facets of my personality most on display? I would say my creativity, my sexuality and my capacity for love. All of these are most prominent in my relationship with miss.

quote:

Is fear a factor?


No. I might engender fear in the context of a scene, but our relationship is based on love, devotion and trust.

quote:

Why did you read this and choose not to answer?


Hee! I did answer. Look up there!

(in reply to PookBaccus)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 3/29/2006 6:24:11 PM   
CERCKL


Posts: 1039
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos
And where does it all come from? I have my theories, the foremost something to do about the veneer civilization puts over our animality...

Bang on, brother.  I believe we are natural, instinct-driven creatures, evolving from other animals to the point where we're "advanced" and "civilized" enough to try and pretend we're something else.  Sorry, but we're just naughty horny instinctual creatures with slightly bigger brains. 


We are the only animals on this earth who've forgotten that we ARE animals...a lot of our behaviors, desires, motivations come from that aspect...as 'humans' we seek other reasons, justifications, meaning for our lives...and complicate things quite a bit.

quote:

What motivates you to be Dominant?
What needs are fulfilled by being Dominant?
Where does it come from? 



I am Dominant, I always have been...in My interactions with others, there has always been an intensity, a power which is generally recognized...in My personal narrative, I have been deemed overwhelming, intimidating, that I tend to consume those around Me with My interaction...I have seen for decades how I affect people through My interactions, how I can make them feel good with a positive gesture or destroy with a look or thoughtless statement...we all have that capability, it seems that for good or bad, I tend to be more extreme in the reactions I garner from others...
This type of influence has no basis in the financial, physical but rather from the Self, if you will...a strong influence from My younger days was a statement by Friedrich Nietzche about how all interactions are an exchange of power; one gives theirs to another...outside of the 'BDSM' relationship, this is seen as a negative thing, in My current relationship with lotus, it is seen in a positive manner...I tend to guide, support and mentor those close to Me...especially she whom I own. The primary need which I find fulfilled is that of creation. The process of creation is the closest I have to the sacred...I am an artist and taking the element of control and creation to a relationship basis is bringing a recognition of 'sacredness' to the relationship...when I am not acting as I am, not only am I miserable but so are those around Me; ask My wife whom I am seperated from...Where does it come from? The same place that St. Augustine claimed 'God' could be located, from with in...Awareness, awakening, discovery, all are our own creations and so is who I choose to label My self in recognition of who I am...with in.

quote:

What facets of your personality are you portraying thru dominance / what facets are being hidden?
Is fear a factor?
Why did you read this and choose not to answer?

My personality period is illustrated through My acceptance and demonstration of who I am...our actions, words, intents are all vibrations which create that around us through our own perceptions...even when I utilize 'randomness' in My art or life, it is still directed through Me...the aspects which are hidden...well, that is part of the reason for self-discovery, to illuminate all that I am as well as My potential, My reality...fear? Fear is usually the emotion which accompanies uncertainty, be it physical, emotional, spiritual...as in the tantric practices, especially diety yoga; one acts as if they ARE enlightened and one then becomes what their actions are... I prefer curious to afraid...and it hasn't always worked 'well' but I am still discovering...
Why do some read and not respond? Some are not at the place of looking at themselves and being honest yet; they may or may not...and there's always something on the television...
C


_____________________________

AND I AM TOO AN ASSHOLE, I HAVE REFERENCES!!!

"Please, please, please believe me, I really am an asshole. All that Enlightenment and Higher Learning shit was all a ruse."

(in reply to CanadianGuy)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 4/11/2006 10:52:59 AM   
slaveseeker


Posts: 8
Joined: 2/18/2004
Status: offline 		What motivates me?????
I guess its just waking up in the morning.
What fear di I hide????
Well i haven't told anyone but I fear walking accidently upon a mother grizzley in the woods

(in reply to CERCKL)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 4/11/2006 11:04:24 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		For the life of me I can't answer this question,its just who and what I am.I have always been the leader with my family and peers at a very early age and continues today...I guess I just love the look of adulation in my girls eyes when they look up at me smiles...IT natural is some I just happen to be a natural dom...bounty

_____________________________

US going to hell in a hand basket/

(in reply to PookBaccus)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 4/11/2006 4:07:09 PM   
cillydom


Posts: 332
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		it feels natural and i like it

and subbies are more fun than anything

(in reply to PookBaccus)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 4/11/2006 5:05:30 PM   
ArtfulTrainer


Posts: 24
Joined: 12/9/2005
Status: offline 		Don't know the motivation-it's not a conscious decision.
I started out switching (just flipped a coin) and eventually found the most reward in the dominant role.
I could say that it is the feeling of control, but it goes much deeper--can't really put a finger on it.
Like an itch-you may not know why its there-could be fleas-but who cares? You do know it feels good to scratch.

(in reply to PookBaccus)
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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 4/12/2006 10:43:34 AM   
HalloweenWhite


Posts: 1028
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PookBaccus

What motivates you to be Dominant?
What needs are fulfilled by being Dominant?
Where does it come from?
What facets of your personality are you portraying thru dominance / what facets are being hidden?
Is fear a factor?
Why did you read this and choose not to answer?

I here inquiring Doms and subs Really Really wanna know.
PookBaccus


(1) I get a charge out of the power-exchange;the feeling of willingness on the sub's part to be/do what I want, and being looked at as someone who is worthy of their submission.

(2) See question 1

(3) I have no idea,its just a part of Me that Ive had a long time that Im now exploring.

(4) The part of Myself that feels more natural/ The part of Myself that feels less inclind to be confined by "humanity", or being/acting like a "civilised" human being.

(5) Nope.

(6) Lmao. I read this question a while ago but didnt answer because I wasnt sure how. Or if I should, given the bluntness of My responses.


               HalloweenWhite.

< Message edited by HalloweenWhite -- 4/12/2006 10:45:07 AM >

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RE: What motivates you to be Dominant? - 4/13/2006 1:29:33 PM   
Arquistador


Posts: 2
Joined: 4/8/2006
Status: offline 		I found BDSM after studying Tantra for six years in an Indian ashram, five of those years as a sanyasi or monk, celibate, engaged in deep meditation 8 hours a day, and practicing mind/breath control and energization exercises. After five years I was deemed ready for the sexual practice and placed with my devayoni, a young German girl who had been monastic for three years. Part of our practice involved what were basically role-playing rituals using stories from Hindu scripture about encounters between the gods, or between gods and mortals. I noticed whenever I would adopt the role of the god Siva i had this sense of a hidden door opening within the inner self that allowed my essence to flow into something much larger than the ordinary self while at the same time more impersonal. We were both aware of ourselves not choosing our roles but flowing into them, and then feeling that we fit them better than we did our smaller selves. In some rituals the gods metamorphose into animals, and we both felt an extraordinary sense of power and freedom when we became the animals. Sex as animals was an ecstatic experience, very rough, very violent, as animals can be when they play with each other. The sexual practices were long and complex, and we would roar and claw and lunge at each other, and were often bruised and bloody at the end. I was aware of the immense pleasure I derived from inflicting pain, and she was aware of the same intense pleasure of receiving pain. Neither of us had ever glimpsed these tendencies in ourselves before. I asked her why she took pain but never gave it out, and she said it would have been impossible because the less she inserted her will or desires the more ecstatic energy would flow so it was literally impossible to direct the dance if she was the dancer. I had exactly the same feelings. Far from feeling lesser because she was passive, she felt supremely powerful, and at such times we were able to raise kundalini right up through the seven centres and gain perception of another level of consciousness that defies words.

With this issue, I feel, the problems all become semantic. The mortar and pestle are viewed as equals, why not the penis and vagina? Why is the Dom viewed as greater than the sub, for without the sub there is no dom? A long-winded answer yet, I feel, a necessary one. 

(in reply to HalloweenWhite)
Profile   Post #: 17
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