RE: If you told your slave

RE: If you told your slave (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master

Message

ishyB -> RE: If you told your slave (2/21/2010 11:50:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: EbonyWood quote: ORIGINAL: ishyB In the middle of Amsterdam, I've made the 10 min walk to a BDSM club, in fetish outfit (that did cover up the "vital" parts), my hands chained behind my back and my collar with a leash attached to the belt of the Dom I was with. He had a friend of mine similarly dressed and leashed on his other side. Some people laughed, or stared, but most of them just ignored us (anybody who has ever been to Amsterdam can attest to this type of reaction from the "natives" there.) I've been recently, and while what you're saying is still mostly true, especially in the Red Light district, there is some change in the air. Coffee shops are now under surveillance and some prostitution laws are being reviewed. The CDP coalition has just lost power and there is a backlash against permissiveness, currently fuelled at anger against a political party formed advocating child pornography. Social conservatism is re emerging in much of Europe. Ah well, this was over 5 years ago, and the most recent time I've been there was a couple years back. I'm very sad to hear things are changing, I enjoyed the open spirit Amsterdam has. It's used to be the only city in the world where I would meet people and think "really??? he/she's out in broad daylight in public dressed like THAT???" and then look around me full amazement to notice that most people didn't even pay as much attention as I was.

WyldHrt -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 12:28:45 AM)
quote: No, I wasn't rather lucky, that's what I've been trying to explain. In the US, you are right, I would have been arrested. Apologies, your profile says Iowa (as does Bull's), so I assumed you were in the US. As the OP is in the US, it really shouldn't be surprising that most of the responses were made with US laws in mind. That said, I stand by what I said- In this case, the reasons may belong to the Dominant; but the consequences are on the sub.

ishyB -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 12:33:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WyldHrt quote: No, I wasn't rather lucky, that's what I've been trying to explain. In the US, you are right, I would have been arrested. Apologies, your profile says Iowa (as does Bull's), so I assumed you were in the US. As the OP is in the US, it really shouldn't be surprising that most of the responses were made with US laws in mind. That said, I stand by what I said- In this case, the reasons may belong to the Dominant; but the consequences are on the sub. I mentioned it happened in Antwerp, but I guess I should have mentioned the country as well. My own prejeduce working there, assuming that everybody would know where that is. [:)] I'm currently living in the US, with Master Bull, but I was born and raised in Belgium. Even though the laws might be different in the US, that still doesn't change the fact that there are many many circomstances in which the OP's question doesn't result in any trouble. Legally, I agree with you though, the consequences remain with the sub, and as such, the final responsibility for their own actions, including the choice which commands to obey or disobey, remains with the sub.

AquaticSub -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 12:59:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ishyB I mentioned it happened in Antwerp, but I guess I should have mentioned the country as well. My own prejeduce working there, assuming that everybody would know where that is. [:)] Also there are Antwerps in the USA. It's like Paris, Texas. [;)] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antwerp,_Ohio

WyldHrt -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 1:01:07 AM)
quote: I mentioned it happened in Antwerp, but I guess I should have mentioned the country as well. My own prejeduce working there, assuming that everybody would know where that is. [:)] I'm currently living in the US, with Master Bull, but I was born and raised in Belgium. I know where Antwerp is [:D], and that the laws about public nudity are different there. That wasn't the point though, as the OP is in the US. quote: Even though the laws might be different in the US, that still doesn't change the fact that there are many many circomstances in which the OP's question doesn't result in any trouble. That's the thing though, innit? No specifics were given in the OP, so it could be anything from a private party, closed to the public in a local pub.... to Chuck-E-Cheese at high noon. quote: Really, I agree with you though, the consequences remain with the sub, and as such, the final responsibility for their own actions, including the choice which commands to obey or disobey, remains with the sub. That's pretty much where I was going with that. [;)] As Littlewonder said, if one chooses well, such things tend to be a nonissue.

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 4:49:51 AM)
quote: That's not the same as ignoring consequences. It means someone else is taking care of them. Which is why if you were to tell me to strip in a restaurant, I would. Because I know that you would not tell me to do it if there were a chance of negative consequences. I know and trust you well enough to know these had been taken care of.

CaringandReal -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 5:52:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf If you told your slave... ...to undress in a restaurant would you expect her to regardless of the consequences? OSF, reading your threads can be like watching the penultimate scene to Taming of the Shrew, over and over and over again. Not that I mind, in fact, I love that particular scene, but the "high" reponses ("I will intentionally miss the point of the question even if it makes me look dumb as shit because I so desperately need to villify this guy") you get in here are quite interesting as well as amusing. Your "inner daddy" seems to be bringing out all the angry rebellious teenage-girl feelings in the fem-snark population here, lol. But what is really interesting to me is that this sort of scenario (obeying without question) has dozens, if not hundreds of mudane and totally safe counterparts in an ordinary (is there such a thing? :) ) power exchange relationship. We (submissives who are controlled in any significant way) all face these situations in which for whatever reason (horrible day at work, losing an old friend, got a traffic ticket, burned the cassarole, etc.) we are in a terrible mood and just do not want to obey the order we have just been given. In those situations it's very easy to "turn all legal" on one's dominant and find all kinds of reasons and excuses for why simply obeying him or her would be the worst thing possible and, in fact, do you irrepairable psychic damage. That's what these thread protestations remind me of: that sort of weaselly reasoning that almost all of us on occasion to get out of simply obeying. I've had a lot of experience in the slave role, but the legal-weasel mindset is still something I have to be constantly vigilant for. It starts to creep in, interestingly, when you start to feel secure around your dominant, certain he's not going to abandon you or you accidentally alienate him. Anyway, I've highjacked this thread enough. I found it interesting however, to contrast the submissive responses in this thread to the submissive responses to those in This Thread, going on at the same time. You'd almost think two different sets of people were responding, not the same individuals. This extreme contrast in these two threads is saying something about lipsevice to ideals we all want to believe in (or believe about ourselves) vs. the actual difficult facing of hard reality.

Icarys -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:09:04 AM)
We all seem to be forgetting about people who enjoy showing their bodies off. In my youth: I've gone skinny dipping, Ran nekkid through a crowd and had sex in a few public places. Why are we so prudish and anal now that the first thing we think when someone does something like that is "call the cops" or "Oh the kids will be ruined forever if they see that". I love this country but it has one hell of a stick up it's arse.I don't do those things anymore because it's not me but I do understand how some do. Reminds me of something a friend said to me recently. His wife had a showing in her home studio. Everything was going well till this one family..with their little rats came in and the first thing they honed in on was a boob shot in one of her paintings.. The first thing they did of course was hide little Susie's eyes and make a b-line for the door they had just came in lol. All because they believed that a tit was going to scar her somehow? Gimme a break. The legal side of this argument is extremely flimsy because from my point of view..We all pretty much break societies legal rules at one time or another doing the things we do here. Just because we don't enjoy it doesn't mean we have to condemn it. seeing titties never hurt nobody anyway, ~little johnnie

Icarys -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:16:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CaringandReal quote: ORIGINAL: osf If you told your slave... ...to undress in a restaurant would you expect her to regardless of the consequences? OSF, reading your threads can be like watching the penultimate scene to Taming of the Shrew, over and over and over again. Not that I mind, in fact, I love that particular scene, but the "high" reponses ("I will intentionally miss the point of the question even if it makes me look dumb as shit because I so desperately need to villify this guy") you get in here are quite interesting as well as amusing. Your "inner daddy" seems to be bringing out all the angry rebellious teenage-girl feelings in the fem-snark population here, lol. But what is really interesting to me is that this sort of scenario (obeying without question) has dozens, if not hundreds of mudane and totally safe counterparts in an ordinary (is there such a thing? :) ) power exchange relationship. We (submissives who are controlled in any significant way) all face these situations in which for whatever reason (horrible day at work, losing an old friend, got a traffic ticket, burned the cassarole, etc.) we are in a terrible mood and just do not want to obey the order we have just been given. In those situations it's very easy to "turn all legal" on one's dominant and find all kinds of reasons and excuses for why simply obeying him or her would be the worst thing possible and, in fact, do you irrepairable psychic damage. That's what these thread protestations remind me of: that sort of weaselly reasoning that almost all of us on occasion to get out of simply obeying. I've had a lot of experience in the slave role, but the legal-weasel mindset is still something I have to be constantly vigilant for. It starts to creep in, interestingly, when you start to feel secure around your dominant, certain he's not going to abandon you or you accidentally alienate him. Anyway, I've highjacked this thread enough. I found it interesting however, to contrast the submissive responses in this thread to the submissive responses to those in This Thread, going on at the same time. You'd almost think two different sets of people were responding, not the same individuals. This extreme contrast in these two threads is saying something about lipsevice to ideals we all want to believe in (or believe about ourselves) vs. the actual difficult facing of hard reality. I like you..even if you have blocked me lol.

UniqueRaven -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:20:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CaringandReal But what is really interesting to me is that this sort of scenario (obeying without question) has dozens, if not hundreds of mudane and totally safe counterparts in an ordinary (is there such a thing? :) ) power exchange relationship. We (submissives who are controlled in any significant way) all face these situations in which for whatever reason (horrible day at work, losing an old friend, got a traffic ticket, burned the cassarole, etc.) we are in a terrible mood and just do not want to obey the order we have just been given. In those situations it's very easy to "turn all legal" on one's dominant and find all kinds of reasons and excuses for why simply obeying him or her would be the worst thing possible and, in fact, do you irrepairable psychic damage. That's what these thread protestations remind me of: that sort of weaselly reasoning that almost all of us on occasion to get out of simply obeying. I've had a lot of experience in the slave role, but the legal-weasel mindset is still something I have to be constantly vigilant for. It starts to creep in, interestingly, when you start to feel secure around your dominant, certain he's not going to abandon you or you accidentally alienate him. This. Bold part mine - and it is exactly what i've been thinking of reading this thread as well. Honestly, i know that if my Owner asked me to take off my clothes anywhere he would expect me to without hesitation. And i like to say that i would simply do just that (i have before, just not in a restaurant hee hee). But i also know that i'm capable of this "legal wrangling" to talk him out of it, which is sad, sad for him, and sad for me, when i happens. The look on his face when i finesse my way out of doing something with the "legal" or "emotionally harmful" argument is heart wrenching. So that said, i do my best to simply be obedient. And all i can think of while i read this thread is wow, all the drama that gets tied up into simple obedience. i wrote this in my journal a few months back, and it seems appropriate here: "Slavery is not about the struggle, it's about the acceptance, and moving through that acceptance into service. Be present, open, calm, happy, and ready, and all will be well. Just be - and by being, you will be all that he wants. No struggle, no doubts, no fears. Listen to him, learn from him, step off of the precipice, and know that he will catch you, with strength, passion, creativity, desire.....and love." [:)] edited to add: And yes, my Owner would be incredibly unlikely to ask me to strip anywhere in front of anyone - he's quite protective of his property. But i don't see this thread as "is it OK to non-consensually expose others in a restaurant to nudity" - i see it as about obedience. Obedience trumps the argument every time for me.

Aynne88 -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:22:05 AM)
If I am out with my man, dressed to kill and dropping 200 plus on a fabulous dinner, and a lovely bottle of wine, and some moron tells his "slave" to strip and instead of gazing lovingly at my foie gras and pemaquids, I have to look at someone's gash or naked probably less than appealing ass instead? It has nothing to do with being a prude, it has to do with being 1. So not happy with being forced to partake in such fucking idiocy and 2. Just not wanting to look upon a vast majority of people I see while dining naked. Ever. Never ever. Much less forced upon me. Actually I don't care if I am having lunch and spending 20 bucks, keep your twat in your undies thanks very much while in a public restaurant. It is eons away from an overly protective parent and the beauty of the female form in art. Not even close.

Icarys -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:25:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aynne88 If I am out with my man, dressed to kill and dropping 200 plus on a fabulous dinner, and a lovely bottle of wine, and some moron tells his "slave" to strip and instead of gazing lovingly at my foie gras and pemaquids, I have to look at someone's gash or naked probably less than appealing ass instead? It has nothing to do with being a prude, it has to do with being 1. So not happy with being forced to partake in such fucking idiocy and 2. Just not wanting to look upon a vast majority of people I see while dining naked. Ever. Never ever. Much less forced upon me. Actually I don't care if I am having lunch and spending 20 bucks, keep your twat in your undies thanks very much while in a public restaurant. It is eons away from an overly protective parent and the beauty of the female form in art. Not even close. Yes a prude..an angry drunk one at that. That's my take on it. Your take is obviously different.[:D]

osf -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:26:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: InvisibleBlack quote: ORIGINAL: osf to undress in a restaurant would you expect her to regardless of the consequences? Oh good heavens. Is all you do is sit around and think up the most inane questions you can? I can't imagine the circumstances where such a thing would ever occur to me but, to answer your question, if I ever did tell a slave to undress in a public restaurant then, yes, I would expect her to do so because she would know that I had a damn good reason for doing so. I'm not at all interested in getting someone arrested or prosecuted and, since i tend to frequent the same places, I don't want to banned from a favorite restaurant either - but if I ended up in some weird cross between True Lies, Die Hard and Secretary and it was vital for the safety of the ourselves, the innocent bystanders and the Free World that the woman I'm with strip right now - yes I would expect her to obey me - fully understanding that I wouldn't be asking her to do this without a valid reason. There's a certain powerful excitement to saying "I'm going to make you cum in the Van Gogh Room of the Metropolitan Museum of Art and you're not allowed to make a sound or attract any attention". There's something very visceral about having someone whispering in your ear, begging you to "take them somewhere" while your fingers are playing with her somewhere she can't let go. I had a submissive who was very into what I'll call subtle public play - where the potential of discovery is part of the thrill. This is different. I think the drive behind the question is along the lines of "who do you expect your slave to believe, their own eyes or you". Given that we'd been together for a long enough time to understand each other and have developed a comfortable relationship based on mutual trust and understanding, I would expect them to question - but assuming I knew what I was doing - yes, I would expect them to obey. This works the other way, too. Some time ago my best friend was getting married and I was his best man. Unfortunately, I ended up with the flu and we had a problem at work so I ended up working for 36 straight hours right before the wedding. I made it to the wedding and made it through the ceremony whereupon I turned to my sub and said "That's it. I'm done. I'm going to be gone, out of it gone, in about five minutes. Your job is to get me home and into bed." About thirty hours later I woke up at home and in bed. I never had a doubt that I would. If that woman had run up the stairs out of the blue one day and breathlessly told me to get the shotgun and kill the man in the kitchen right now I would have and I would have asked questions later. There's a big difference between how you trust and/or obey someone you're committed to and what you'd do in a "dating" relationship. If you can answer the question , then what's your problem with the question?

Aynne88 -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:28:52 AM)
Yes that's it. You also forget frigid and bitchy. [8D]. Call me what you will, but keep your vag away from my dinner thanks much!

Icarys -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:31:27 AM)
quote: foie gras and pemaquids quote: ORIGINAL: Aynne88 Yes that's it. You also forget frigid and bitchy. [8D]. Call me what you will, but keep your vag away from my dinner thanks much! I'm gonna have her rub it all over your meal.

Aynne88 -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:32:47 AM)
Well then....I shall order the tuna...tartar.

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:33:32 AM)
quote: Call me what you will, but keep your vag away from my dinner thanks much! But...but...but where's the fun in that....and I thought you loooooved me bursts into tears

Icarys -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:33:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aynne88 Well then....I shall order the tuna...tartar. You'll barely notice it then! You have thwarted my plans yet again....[;)]

osf -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:34:02 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven Actually, this reminds me of one of the reasons I did not like 9-1/2 Weeks - the scene in which Mickey Rourke's "Dom" made Kim Basinger's sub shoplift. Being a Dom means taking responsibility, not simply giving orders. i totally think dominants can be assholes too, or they would be referred to as saint dominant

Aynne88 -> RE: If you told your slave (2/22/2010 6:35:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: ORIGINAL: Aynne88 Well then....I shall order the tuna...tartar. You'll barely notice it then! You have thwarted my plans yet again....[;)] I am a drunken thwarter. [;)]. Let's go to dinner.

Page: << < prev 9 10 [11] 12 13 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875