A few switch questions... (Full Version)

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CarrieO -> A few switch questions... (3/1/2010 5:31:04 AM)

These are just a few basic questions.  Just to get a clearer picture of who currently identifies as a switch on these boards.  There may have been some great threads in the past about this but I think it's time for a fresh start...what with so many new people coming around CM.

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 

Thanks for the replies.

*edited for spelling and grammer...ugh!



CarrieO -> RE: A few switch questions... (3/1/2010 6:01:52 AM)

Silly me...I guess I could start.

quote:


*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 

I've used "submissive" to identify what I am in the past.  I've considered choosing the dominant red letters here on CM but felt switch best fit, if I had to choose any label.  Plus, I relate to the duality and flow of the word.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave

Yes, I've become more of a dominant switch who likes to bottom or submit sometimes. That's a mouthful.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 

Yes, all of the above. 

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?

Nope, see answer #1....I will admit to still learning and growing as a person, regardless of chosen labels.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 

Generally, the offline bdsm communities I've started to become involved with are receptive to switches.  I've met a few people who call them players (in a very negative way) but those have been the exceptions.  I've only started explore my local crowd in the past 6 months, though, so who knows.  Most have been open-minded.  



*edited to add....I'm still not 100% comfortable with putting myself into any box, even if it's labeled "switch"  Maybe this is one of the problems people have with calling themselves a switch...you're still choosing a label...ugh!



Wolf2Bear -> RE: A few switch questions... (3/1/2010 6:26:26 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

These are just a few basic questions.  Just to get a clearer picture of who currently identifies as a switch on these boards.  There may have been some great threads in the past about this but I think it's time for a fresh start...what with so many new people coming around CM.

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 
- it is part of the process of my journey in this and finally knowing more about myself and my role in WIITWD. The more I experience and learn, the more I gain the tools to accurately define who I am and where I fit in.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
 - if you mean in relation to the role of another, yes most times this is true.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 
- I see switching as mostly relation to the psychological aspect of a dominant/submissive traits of a person. The top/bottom terms I see as pertaining to the actual roles/positions a person takes in any given activity. I may engage in some topping of a person yet ultimately I bottom in all activities in the end.

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
- No I don't believe I have. As I wrote earlier, I chose switch because the label of submissive just doesn't seem to apply as accurately anymore. I believe that most of us who first started out , chose a term which I thought applied to me and through understanding myself more, that original label lost it's validity.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 
- Overall I look at them in the same way I look at someone who identifies as either submissive or dominant, which is to say I don't judge them by the role they identify with. It's the same approach I use if a person says they are Buddhist or they taken a vow of chastity. Granted I have seen how others view us who identify as switches yet I take comfort in knowing that how I identify and label myself is all that matters. The tolerance and a "to each their own" attitude I have in life I do my best to apply to others regarding BDSM.


Thanks for the replies.

*edited for spelling and grammer...ugh!



allthatjaz -> RE: A few switch questions... (3/1/2010 10:20:54 AM)

CarrieO

These are just a few basic questions.  Just to get a clearer picture of who currently identifies as a switch on these boards.  There may have been some great threads in the past about this but I think it's time for a fresh start...what with so many new people coming around CM.

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 
Because I am not dominant all the time and I am not submissive all of the time.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
Yes absolutely.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 
It depends on the individuals. Personally its dominant/submissive but we can have top/bottom fun too because everything in between is on a very equal level

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
I had a long term relationship with a male sub. I spent years on the scene as a dominant woman. Switching is the end of my journey of incompleteness, what perhaps I was unknowingly looking for all along. This is the final chapter and happy ending!

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 
I upset a lot of subs when I came out as a switch but that was there own selfish disappointment. I had a few Doms snigger and shake their heads but they are the sort of dominants I really don't want to be associated with anyway.
On the whole its been fantastic and people have been very embracing and accepting.
I find switches are much more widely accepted and respected on the real life scene.

Thanks for the replies.





Reform -> RE: A few switch questions... (3/1/2010 10:53:52 AM)

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 
I chose to switch in order to help my boy enter into the world of BDSM. I am kinky, he is not, but I'm working on that.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
I self-identify as a submissive, but tell people switch because that's what I do and it seems to fit better.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 
Yes, I think those are possibilities. So is top/submissive, and dominant/bottom. The latter more closely resembles the relationship I have with my boy. I am the dominant, but I still bottom to him when we switch. I do not see him as my dominant, even when he's on top. Confusing, I know.

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
That's part of it, yes. I am quite young, and my journey is still beginning.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 
Online, I haven't had any problems. I witness people saying things about switches, but knowing that they choose to feel that way, I generally don't try to correct them. That's an uphill battle I don't want to fight. Offline, I've only been to one or two events, and that's not really a fair sampling pool to comment.



afkarr -> RE: A few switch questions... (3/1/2010 4:56:17 PM)

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive?
Becaue I have a bi side, but i only top women, and only sub to men.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
Predominately sub.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature?
Depends on the circumstances under which I'm switching,

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
No. I've accepted the fact I just have my own brand of weirdness. See answer # 1.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community?
I don't know. I don't participate in the community offline, and tend to exist online as a sub.




Level -> RE: A few switch questions... (3/1/2010 4:58:47 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 

Because, using my definitions, that's what I am.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave

I'm dominant, one that has enjoyed bottoming before.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 

Dominant and bottoming.

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?

No.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 

Switches seem to be more accepted offline, maybe because there isn't that "keyboard kommando" rigamarole going on.

Thanks for the replies.

You're quite welcome [:D]



glitch -> RE: A few switch questions... (3/1/2010 6:01:54 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

These are just a few basic questions.  Just to get a clearer picture of who currently identifies as a switch on these boards.  There may have been some great threads in the past about this but I think it's time for a fresh start...what with so many new people coming around CM.

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 

I've found that I prefer to switch back and forth rather than sticking with dominant or submissive. I've found that when I'm forced into one role for too long, the other mindset tends to overtake my day-to-day activities in other ways.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave

Not on any consistent basis. If my partner is primarily one, then I'll identify with the other primarily, working the other into my daily life. There have been a few cases where I couldn't identify properly with my partner and that created more issues than I care to admit.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 

Both although usually one or the other at a time. I've come across about every combination of the two sets in my relationships thus far.

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?

No, as I mentioned before, I have tendencies of both Dominant and Submissive in my life and when one is stressed at one point, the other tends to overtake other portions of my life.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 

I haven't delved too deep into the offline bdsm community, although switches weren't too common with the groups I've talked to.

Thanks for the replies.

S'all good [;)]

*edited for spelling and grammer...ugh!




Andalusite -> RE: A few switch questions... (3/2/2010 7:46:50 AM)

Currently I have a Master and a female submissive playpartner, but even when I was single, or was monogamous with my previous Dominant, or with a top or a bottom, I have considered myself to be a switch since I first discovered I liked to bottom occasionally. I consider that to be my identity, and slave to be my relationship designation. [:D]

IMHO, anyone who likes any combination of Domination/Sadism/Topping and submission/masochism/bottoming is a switch. Dominant masochists, submissive sadists, top/bottom only egalitarian kinky folks, it's all good! So far, I haven't felt any inclination to switch on a D/s basis with the same person, although I'm perfectly happy with topping and bottoming to the same person.

I'm very decisive about being a switch. [;)]

In person, I haven't had any flack over being a switch. I did have some people try to claim that I was or should be submissive when I was just bottoming, or not involved with them at all. Online, I've had a couple of posters in the "Ask A Mistress" forum claim I shouldn't post there because I'm currently a slave, even though I had a 5-year D/s relationship with my previous submissive, and currently am involved with my submissive playpartner. Other than that, most of the anti-switch talk has been in general, or directed primarily toward men, rather than me in particular. Lot of nonsense, like claiming that anyone who has ever bottomed couldn't *possibly* be dominant, and the like.





Steelslilbit -> RE: A few switch questions... (4/20/2010 8:34:06 PM)

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 
Because according to my needs/wants/desires/wishes and the "definitions" of the words I've come to understand, and the fact I have to choose something because "ME" is not an option here, I'm a switch.  ^.^

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
I can and have depending on the situation at hand.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 
See above. ^.^

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
No, actually when I first joined collar me, and before that when I first started in the life, I considered myself and was considered a sub.  Thanks to my "training" with different masters I've come to realize that I am not "just" a submissive.  I am something else.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 
There are a lot of close minded people in the BDSM community both online and off.  It's been my unfortunate luck to have run into several in real life situations.  It's a lot harder to deal with someone who is telling you that switches don't exist when there is no "block user" button.  However, even with those things being dealt with, I'd have to say that those people are the exception not the rule.  Most people have the same mentality, if you like it that's all that matters.  ^.^



aphrodite5 -> RE: A few switch questions... (4/21/2010 9:39:11 AM)

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 
For the most part, I identify as a submissive. I also identify as a dominant in certain relationships, which technically makes me a switch whether I choose that title or not. Since 'submissive and sometimes dominant' is a mouthful, we'll go with 'switch.'

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
Yes. See above.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 
I see switching as having many forms, entirely dependent on the people involved. In my case, it is dom/sub. I don't generally do casual play, it's all part of a relationship dynamic.

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
No. That seems to be the general view of switches -- they're just undecided. I don't see that being the case with most of the people who identify that way, however. We're just folks who want it all. [:D]
This is the current state of my life journey.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community?
I'm only somewhat involved with the local community. I'll have to bow out of this question.



MrCaneSevere -> RE: A few switch questions... (4/27/2010 2:19:55 AM)

This is a very complex matter for me coming fron the UK alot of it depends on the weather eg. warmer or summer time, i feel  submissive thoughts when i go and have my head shaved at the Barber shop.
Winter colder weather i clam up and feel very powerful and dominant.



evilmadman -> RE: A few switch questions... (6/5/2010 1:00:32 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

These are just a few basic questions.  Just to get a clearer picture of who currently identifies as a switch on these boards.  There may have been some great threads in the past about this but I think it's time for a fresh start...what with so many new people coming around CM.

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 
Because I have a dominant personality, but submission is really relaxing for me. Also I do not like to limit myself to one category, so I pick them both. The main goal is to have fun with someone you like and someone you trust.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
Yes

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 
Dominant/submissive

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
I guess so, I have a split personality on this and I don't know which I prefer better.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 
I'm pretty new here and didn't have the change to get an impression or see their acceptance in the offline bdsm community.

Thanks for the replies.

*edited for spelling and grammer...ugh!
quote:

What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm communit



CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: A few switch questions... (6/5/2010 2:49:22 AM)

quote:

These are just a few basic questions.  Just to get a clearer picture of who currently identifies as a switch on these boards.  There may have been some great threads in the past about this but I think it's time for a fresh start...what with so many new people coming around CM.

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 
Other than it's very convenient and helps to severely limit the amount of mail in my mailbox?  Because I can feel dominant or submissive depending on who I'm around, and I prefer the domme side to the submissive side.  I'm not bi nor poly, and can't switch with the same person, so for me it's an either/or situation.  

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
Dominant, and I'd like any submissive part of my nature to just go to sleep and not wake up. <grins> 

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 
When I'm not in dominant mode, I was in submissive mode.  That was years under the bridge though.  I have topped, when I didn't have a submissive and the flogger called to me [:D] but I have never bottomed.  I have no dreams of being the one tied up or spanked or anything, so I'm beginning to think I don't have a masochistic side. 

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
No.  I'm not undecided.  If I could, I'd deep six that old submissive side so it would stay buried, and then life wouldn't be so potentially complicated.  It's hard enough keeping a relationship between two people together, I wouldn't want to have to complicate things by adding a third person to the mix.  I can't possibly imagine switching with the same person, but this is just me and I know others manage it just fine.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 
My impression of switches?  Since I mostly meet submissives...  In the past 4 years or so, I've only met one male switch in my area, and he's quite the athletic little hottie, but he's not as much into the dominance/submission as I am so our interests didn't click.  The other switch I've met is female, and a friend of mine, and she's a sweet lil thing who's now owned.  As for what the community in my area thinks of switches, I'd probably have to ask someone like BOUNTYHUNTER how things were like in the munch group.  Whenever I've finally handled some "charcoal cannister" problem with my vehicle, I plan to attend the munch group, SMACK, in Beckley and possibly the munch group in Charleston.
 
I've something else to add on my impression of switches.  There seems to be a lot more of us out there than I assumed.  So many fem subs cross over and become switches, and there are so many male dominants that have a small switchy side.  It's hard to remember someone's a switch when all I see of them is their submissive side. [:D]

Thanks for the replies.
Thanks for asking the questions.



FlamingRedhead -> RE: A few switch questions... (6/5/2010 2:10:11 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive?


It's honest and a lot easier than saying "a person who prefers to be submissive within a relationship but likes to top."

quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave


I have the fact that I'm enslaved on my profile as well as the fact that I have a bottom.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature?


Both. Some people consider me dominant in my own way while others only see me as submissive. I'm also a sadomasochist, so I top and bottom.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?


Nope.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community?


The very few I've met in person seemed more like bedroom kinksters and not so much into D/s. There's nothing wrong with that, but it wasn't what I was looking for. In my local community, I don't feel that the majority disapprove of switches. I've endured one conversation resolving around whether or not switches exist, and I had a femdom tell me that she wouldn't play with me because she could tell that I wouldn't submit, only bottom. *shrugs* I don't play well with femdoms anyway, probably because they want submission which ain't happening, while male doms don't seem to mind if I bottom. I only submit to my SO.



Sitch -> RE: A few switch questions... (6/7/2010 9:54:29 PM)

For me the variation is dependent upon whom I'm with.



Aine -> RE: A few switch questions... (6/28/2010 12:31:46 AM)

These are just a few basic questions.  Just to get a clearer picture of who currently identifies as a switch on these boards.  There may have been some great threads in the past about this but I think it's time for a fresh start...what with so many new people coming around CM.

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 

Because I am both.  I am no more one than the other.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave

Yes.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 

I see it as an extremely vague and broad term that can mean many things.  I don't assume anything when I see someone that identifies as switch.  It is merely an opening to a more detailed discussion.

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?

Nope.  When I chose switch, I was damned sure what I was.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 

Varied.  Both acceptance and intolerance due to lack of information, both unintentional and intentional ignorance.







Ligeia72 -> RE: A few switch questions... (6/29/2010 10:11:05 PM)

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 

Because that's the word that describes what I do/am into the best. Apart from roleplaying within a scene, I don't really get into the whole Dominant/Submissive aspect of BDSM, I'm more into the S&M side of things. Sometimes I like to give, sometimes I like to receive. I do have a preference for Topping, but that's not set in stone, hence - I'm a switch

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave

No. If I'm talking with someone who is not familiar with BDSM terms I will say that I'm a Switch who prefers to Domme, rather than use the word 'Top', but I don't identify as Dominant.

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 

Depends on the view point of the person doing the switching. For me it's Top/Bottom, for someone else it might be Dominant/Submissive

*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?

No.

*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community? 

Not involved in the offline BDSM community so can't render an opinion.




HowdoyouPurr -> RE: A few switch questions... (6/30/2010 6:58:14 PM)

*Why do you choose to identify as a switch instead of dominant or submissive? 
I was raised heavily in the church so was raised under christianity hard core a system of beliefs that involve in short loving others more then yourself. I have always been a natural teacher just like my father I naturally lead but I also since im male and straight I see woman as love God on earth. Its hard not to worship woman when thats how you were raised by your grandparents. So I am a Dominant but I'm not as well I am always fully both no matter how I with the person doesn't matter which side of the D/s fetish they are Top or bottom. Its not simply how I see myself but how I see You thats right the person reading this. Never met you but when raised to see you a specific way from birth hard to change it no matter what role I'm in as a Master or as a submissive.

*Do you identify as switch in conjunction with dominant/submissive/slave
Yes and no I am a Switch its literally that simple but when I with another make the choice for me to be in one role as Master or slave you can't switch back and forth when you feel like it. If your a slave you need a Dominants permission to otherwise your not really a Switch in my opinion unless your in a relationship where your role is not locked in a specific meeting/session with the person. If you catch my meaning its not absolute since there is so many different types of D/s relationships even with one governing another. This is just my opinion only

*Do you see switching as top/bottom or dominant/submissive in nature? 
No I see switching as simply two ways to express yourself to a person you love.
I believe that everyone is in truth a Switch I know I'm biased that way since I am one and people identify with what they see themselves as. We choose a role that is most comfortable with us so we as humans tend to go black and white but its not always needed so Most simply go Dom and others subs its different ways to use your will with another person.
*Did you choose switch because you're still undecided?
No I chose Switch because I can do either completely comfortably to fulfill the needs wants and desires of who I am with and is around me and yes I see that if I'm a Master or if I'm a slave or submissive. I entered this world since I was engaged in real to a chinese lady that was raised traditionally she was raised in a very D/s environment even if it isn't sexual at all So I knew if I was to have any chance to marry her in real I HAD to learn how to Dominate effectively so I entered this world as a sub learned what it was to love to another completely in submissive and then got released and trained as a Master all online of course so far at present which may make a few people reading this go ow god not another one. Well I'll simply say to that if you had the thought besides me mentioning it. I agree with the thought in most degrees.
*What has been your impression of switches and their acceptance in the offline bdsm community?
From all that I have seen and heard not offline I have seen a few assumptions especially if the switch is male and that is they simply want sex and they don't care if they are asking for it or have to sit for a few minutes for a Mistress to warm up. Many that claim to be Switchs are just sex junkies if you catch my meaning. I.E. people not realizing this is a world of service not sex even if ...............  hehe Thought that pause might give a few people a smile from their naughty thoughts if any. Anyways hope that awnsers the questions. Laters



Nehemiah -> RE: A few switch questions... (7/2/2010 4:56:53 PM)

An easy question to answer.

I am a switch because I believe in "Life without limits."



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