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Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 6:28:56 PM   
putmetowork


Posts: 8
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Hello all...

Firstly please let me say, a kind and well meaning hello to all the folks on c'me. The people I have met on hear so far have been wonderful... It's amazing to have a place to share and to learn...

Based on that notion, I have a question?

I pride myself on working hard, to be able to offer myself into service and by that I mean "real work". Errands, chores, cleaning for a Dominant woman. Not just being able to do it, but really trying to learn about ironing, or what cleaning agents to use and why. I don't just want to be a houseboy... I want to be a "GREAT" houseboy.

So then my question is this... What could I do, what could I offer... I understand the answer would be different but nothing in my oppinion is wrong... If a Houseboy like me, were to approach You (as I am right now), and respectfully ask. What could I do, that would put a smile on Your face and cause You to experience the pleasure of enjoying a slave/servant.

What, would it be...?

Thanks in advance!

robby.
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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 6:35:50 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		You could be in Portland, Oregon, by 8 pm.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 6:53:55 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I don't tend to start folks out in service to Me by them coming to My home.  I'm more likely to put you to work at a BDSM related event or see how you work out cleaning the local dungeon.  This not only allows Me to see if you're serious about the task, I get to see how well you follow instruction and how thorough you are, before you ever know My home address.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 7:06:19 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz

You could be in Portland, Oregon, by 8 pm.


And pass through Kansas City on your way. 
 
Seriously though, it would really depend on what you already know how to do.  For me, the biggest help at the moment would be someone who is capable of doing household repairs.  For example, I really need my primary bathroom remodeled, including new pipes for the tub and shower.  While that's probably a bit more labor intensive than most women are going to want or need, the versatility and capability to do everything from yardwork, to basic car maintenance, to planning, cooking, and serving supper is always beneficial.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 7:07:00 PM   
putmetowork


Posts: 8
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Thank You both :)

I am guessing that in many way "service" could be the idea of scrubbing floors, errands, or chores.

The fact is that I think that maybe it could mean so much more... I have my idea's, but I don't deny I am definetly interested in a Domme's point of view.
Sometimes, I think just trying to anticipate needs, even simple ones is the direction to go... But then on the other hand is that really so special?

I know that it in some way's is a little like asking how blue is the sky... But dammit (forgive my language), what is so wrong with not wanting to be great at service, if it service I offer.

I guess what I am saying is... I could think to take my owners car in for gas before it even seems to be gettin low (which is good), but what if when I do that I clean the car, detail the inside, leave a custome CD of music in the radio, a gift small gift in the trunk, and new book in the glove box, and some various small gifts in the cup holders, maybe on the dash, under the seat... You get the idea!

That is what I am talking about, :)

robby.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 7:11:36 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		robby,

All of those things are fine and could be quite lovely. However, every woman has her own desires as to what she considers service, and what she wants.

Do keep all those things you just mentioned in mind, they are sweet and many women may find them as such. But, avoid becoming so focused on what YOU consider to be good service that you neglect to ask the person whom you wish to serve what SHE considers to be good service.



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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 7:20:50 PM   
putmetowork


Posts: 8
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Status: offline 		Domin8tingUrDrmz,

Thanks for the feedback...

Your right, I suppose when the time is right perhaps I can simply ask (what can I do to serve You). My hope in the original question was that, one I want to be ready to offer a level of service. I know it sounds silly to say, but I want to be the best servant that some lucky Domme (Well, lucky me) has ever found.

So, I feel like anything in life I want to prepare myself, learning as many skills and getting as many ideas as possible. For example I have spent hours on the TIDE website just thinking about how to be great at doing laundry... Or the fact the I know a bit about fashion, or cooking... I just feel like in some way I can offer up these skills to a Dominant woman, as something that "she" will enjoy...

That was my question... I have appreciated Your responses so far... With thanks.

I don't want it to seem however, all regimented and I hope I don't give that appearance, I can understand why each woman would want and be entitled to her own individual preferences.

That said, You must all want a sparkling toilet bowl and nice meal.

or was it... crisp clean sheets, and movie passes.

I know, I know (both right) :)

robby.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 7:36:19 PM   
Madame4a


Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline 		I tend to keep my service needs tailored to the person I am with.  My boy has enough to do without worrying about my house.  I like when she does my boots, takes me to the store (or other shopping), takes care of everything when we're on the motorcycles.. for a long or short trip.. those things are important to me.  Her service is in very small meaningful ways on a daily basis most of the time.

I had a boy once who was GREAT at doing floors.. when she was in my house, she did all my floors.. to perfection. 

Everyone has their strengths and for me, its best to play to them.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 7:47:44 PM   
Rochsub2009


Posts: 2536
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: putmetowork

I want to be ready to offer a level of service. I know it sounds silly to say, but I want to be the best servant that some lucky Domme (Well, lucky me) has ever found.

So, I feel like anything in life I want to prepare myself, learning as many skills and getting as many ideas as possible. For example I have spent hours on the TIDE website just thinking about how to be great at doing laundry... Or the fact the I know a bit about fashion, or cooking...



Robby,
i think your question was directed at the Mistresses, but i'd like to offer a few thoughts.

First of all, i'd like to reiterate what Domin8tingUrDrmz said.  Don't be so focused on what YOU want to do for them.  Instead, focus your attention on what THEY want done.  i've served a few Dommes who would have gotten very irritated had i done what you suggested.  Specifically, the idea of doing a bunch of "extra" stuff probably wouldn't have gone over very well.  Some Dommes want you to do EXACTLY as you are told.  Doing all of that extra stuff would be seen as an act of disobedience.

Don't get me wrong.  i'm not saying that all Dommes would respond that way.  i'm sure there are many who would appreciate your extra efforts.  But some won't appreciate it.  That's why it is best to focus on what She wants.  If She wants you to exceed her expectations, then do it.  But if She wants you to do exactly as you are told, then do that.

Personally, i think that spending hours on the Tide website is a bit excessive, but that's just me.  In my experience, i've found that spending your time doing exercises to strengthen your tongue will benefit Her a lot more than learning about the cleaning properties of laundry detergent. 

And being a great conversationalist will win you more points in Her eyes than ANY of the above.

< Message edited by Rochsub2009 -- 3/10/2010 7:48:59 PM >

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 8:46:04 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		Personally, if someone filled my cupholders up with little gifts, I'd be annoyed to no end...lol. My cup holders are for my cell phone, my smokes, and my latte dammit! Now, if you were to put those things in the proper cup holders while I was getting ready to head to the car, that would be lovely.

I have a website that needs updating. I have a recipe database that needs updating. Doing things like that would free me to do things I enjoy more. Yeah, don't get me wrong, I like clean floors, but clean floors can be accomplished by anyone who lives here, it doesn't have to be 'just' the submissive/slave's job.

But if you want tips on things to learn, learn how to give a GOOD hot stone massage. Learn how to give a good manicure, pedicure, and facial. Learn how to cook amazing food. Learn how to do things that women spend good money having someone else do for them. Then, after you learn all that stuff...seriously, come to Oregon...lol.. no wait, seriously forget all that you've learned and learn to submit the way that the person who you wish to submit to wants you to submit.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 9:27:14 PM   
LPslittleclip


Posts: 1163
Joined: 9/29/2007
Status: offline 		one of the things that i learned to do for my Mistress was to do pedicure and foot massage both of these are well apreciated and enjoyed. every Mistress wil be diffrent in what is wanted or enjoyed might like a good cheesecake to eat.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/10/2010 9:35:09 PM   
WyldHrt


Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Personally, if someone filled my cupholders up with little gifts, I'd be annoyed to no end...lol. My cup holders are for my cell phone, my smokes, and my latte dammit!

*sneaks into D8UD's vehicle and fills cupholders with little gifts*

Seriously though, OP, you are getting some great advice here. IMO, there's nothing wrong with expanding your knowledge so that you have more to bring to the table. In a way, it's like looking for work (don't flame me just yet, Ladies). The more varied your skills, the more likely it is that you will find someone who is looking for a partner with at least some of those skills.

Cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc are great, but can you organize? Keep track of her appointments? Plan and execute a party if she wishes to throw one? Retain knowledge of her frequent guests preferences in food/ drink/entertainment (search "butler's book" on the forums for great ideas on this kind of thing)? How are you with basic computer programs like Word and Excel? Can you give a killer massage? Build a custom shoe rack? Do basic or advanced sewing? Make custom floggers and other toys? The list of possibilities is endless, so pick the things that interest you and go for it.

The danger is that, once you learn the "right" way of doing something (ie your way), it can be hard to let it go in order to do that thing the way your D wants it done. If you keep it firmly in mind that Her way is always the right way (even if it's wrong ), you'll be just fine.    


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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/11/2010 12:47:24 AM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		The thing that puts the biggest smile on My face is to have a sub do what I asked of him in precisely the way I have instructed him to do it and at the time I wanted it done! As many others have said, skills are great but don't get so hard and fast in "your" way of doing these tasks that you aren't able to adapt to HER way. I frankly don't care what it says on the TIDE website, if you were My sub you would use MY choice of washing liquid, load the machine as I want it loaded, hang the clothes on the line in precisely the way I direct, including using matching pegs on each garment! And you will take them in by folding each at the line, or bringing them in on hangers and putting them away in the place and the sequence I direct (I like to keep colours together in the wardrobe).

That's just one example, but it serves to demonstrate that I don't want a sub's skills or knowledge to override My wishes. I am open to hearing his ideas and point of view, and if I agree his way is better then fine, but otherwise My word is final and I want things done WILLINGLY how I direct. From the other responses here ... I'd say I'm typical!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/11/2010 1:32:34 AM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

quote:

Personally, if someone filled my cupholders up with little gifts, I'd be annoyed to no end...lol. My cup holders are for my cell phone, my smokes, and my latte dammit!

*sneaks into D8UD's vehicle and fills cupholders with little gifts*



Guinea Pig, darling, so long as those gifts are a new cell phone, a fresh latte, and my favorite brand of smokes, I'll be happy to spank you red ;).

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/11/2010 1:54:01 AM   
WyldHrt


Posts: 6412
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quote:

Guinea Pig, darling, so long as those gifts are a new cell phone, a fresh latte, and my favorite brand of smokes, I'll be happy to spank you red ;).

Dang, you ruined the punchline!
*Wha? Someone thought I waz bein' bratty?*


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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/11/2010 2:07:24 AM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		It must suck for you subbly types when we dommly types know what you are trying to get

Smooches and spanks.

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/11/2010 3:13:28 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009
In my experience, i've found that spending your time doing exercises to strengthen your tongue will benefit Her a lot more than learning about the cleaning properties of laundry detergent. 


Really?!

How does one get such exercise?  Front and centre, LadyNTrainer!

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/11/2010 3:45:18 AM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		Canada?  Do you have unicorns up there as well?

*edit*

Actually, I'm talking to a 'no limit' pain slut who wants to clean my dungeon top to bottom.  I'm still looking for the 'catch'.  When something seems to good to be true, there is always a catch.  Or am I just getting to cynical in my old age?


< Message edited by MsStarlett -- 3/11/2010 3:47:01 AM >

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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/11/2010 4:32:50 AM   
putmetowork


Posts: 8
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks Everyone...

Wonderful advice and suggestions :)

I have been taking notes...


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RE: Expanding my defintion of service... - 3/11/2010 4:50:08 AM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline 		robby,

Greetings fellow Canadian. I noticed you've been on Collarme a while, but welcome to this side :-)

You've gotten great advice.

I'm going to comment a bit on what Rochsub wrote here:


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009
First of all, i'd like to reiterate what Domin8tingUrDrmz said.  Don't be so focused on what YOU want to do for them.  Instead, focus your attention on what THEY want done.  i've served a few Dommes who would have gotten very irritated had i done what you suggested.  Specifically, the idea of doing a bunch of "extra" stuff probably wouldn't have gone over very well.  Some Dommes want you to do EXACTLY as you are told.  Doing all of that extra stuff would be seen as an act of disobedience.

Don't get me wrong.  i'm not saying that all Dommes would respond that way.  i'm sure there are many who would appreciate your extra efforts.  But some won't appreciate it.  That's why it is best to focus on what She wants.  If She wants you to exceed her expectations, then do it.  But if She wants you to do exactly as you are told, then do that.

Personally, i think that spending hours on the Tide website is a bit excessive, but that's just me.  In my experience, i've found that spending your time doing exercises to strengthen your tongue will benefit Her a lot more than learning about the cleaning properties of laundry detergent. 

And being a great conversationalist will win you more points in Her eyes than ANY of the above.


I tend to be somewhere in the middle when it comes to having something just so vs. liking initiatives. There are some things that I'm very particular about and there are others that I'm pretty lax about. I'm usually pretty clear on what is what, but of course there is a learning curve for a boy as I don't come with a manual. One thing I pride myself on is being pretty consistent. Then again, sometimes, especially when I'm tired, I'm not.

I wouldn't want a boy taking too much initiative until he has gotten to know me and how I tick.

Oh and yes, tongue exercises... that's for good conversation, right Rochsub? ;-)

- LA

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