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lizi -> RE: Slaves and their toys (3/14/2010 7:43:46 PM)
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My Dom has an extensive toy selection he uses on me but will tell me if there is something personal he wants me to have - like a gag. He asked me to get whatever I preferred, he felt it was up to me that I have something I found comfortable. I did my research and chose what I thought would be the best. It didn't make me feel that he was less Dom-like because I made the end choice of what to get....after all I'm the one with the gag in my mouth, not him. And he was right...it was a good move on his part that he asked me to get what i thought was best. My mouth is very small, I know that maybe more than he does...I also preferred having something I could bite so I got a smaller sized ball and post design out of soft rubber. Because he asked me for my input we ended up with something that worked better for us both in the end. Also, before I ordered it I asked him for his approval - so it was still something we worked together on even till the end. As for the loss of respect...as I said I'm the one with the gag in my mouth and he decides when it goes in...no loss of respect there toward the man who is deciding when and where to gag me.
We make some joint decisions on other things. Another example...he brought up the subject of a remote controlled vibrator egg and I did some research and sent him a few recommendations on what I thought would work best. He further narrowed it down by looking at what I presented and adding some insight of his own.
If you're new and looking to build up a collection a good rule of thumb to use is that if it's something you want to keep and it won't necessarily be involved with intimate bodily fluids then you pay for it and you choose what you want to use. Floggers, restraints, whatever 'tools' suit you. If it's an insertable and will come in contact with her in that manner then she should get what is preferable to her and that way it is hers if you choose to part ways. Gags, dildos, vibrators, butt plugs...etc.
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