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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 3/22/2010 8:53:55 PM   
Andalusite


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I wouldn't get involved with a teacher whose class I was taking, even if not for a grade. I think it can get into some weird power dynamics that have nothing to do with D/s. Also, dance communities tend to be a bit gossipy.

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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 3/22/2010 9:13:17 PM   
SailingBum


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ya know life before internet people had no clue to the others kink factor.  I have only dated girls without knowing their kink factor even after the internet.  And never had a problem using them for my pleasure.  Much ado about nothing.

BadOne


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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 3/22/2010 9:25:05 PM   
MasterXMagnum


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One of the things I like to do to gauge a date's responsiveness to possible kink is to say something along the lines of "well, then, YOU need a spanking!" in that off-the-cuff you-can-take-it-as-a-jest manner, with maybe a little lift of the eyebrow if she gives me a smile. I'm never out to scare the straights, though I usually leave them be after a date or two. Ultimately I just can't be interested, and there's little use in prolonging the thing if it's not leading to something satisfying for both of us, Hmm? IMHO of course.

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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 3/23/2010 7:02:41 AM   
slavekal


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There are ways to gradually bring up the subject.  There are movies with kink scenes you can conveniently happen across.  You can also contrive games that turn into kinky situations.  

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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 3/23/2010 10:39:00 PM   
LadyOddsworth


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quote:

ORIGINAL: beej

quote:

I find that if I posture as dominant (if they read between the lines) men respond in a couple of different ways. They posture back as dominant, to establish power.  Or, they respond like a kinky puppy, bubbly and excited (these are the "tie me up and give me a blow job" types).  Or, they fall right into line, politely, sweetly, it's as if they found a home.


this is a bit of what i'm experiencing, not just with the dance instructor but with other dudes as well. i dunno if i'm giving off a scent, but between the instructor (and the difference between before i came into kink and after), and then another dude who wrote down his address and advised that i come by for a cleaning sometime, i see a difference in how men respond to which muscle i flex, especially if it's a dominant one. i just wonder, is it okay for me to do that? especially when i know that most of the time, it would just be for my own satisfaction and not for a relationship?


I say, you want um, then take um. Have a good time.



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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 3/23/2010 10:40:11 PM   
LadyOddsworth


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Seems to me all men, yes even vanilla like some degree of bondage.. That opens the door.

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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 3/26/2010 4:41:59 AM   
DesFIP


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From: Apple County NY
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Beej, how do you know he's vanilla? Unless the two of you have discussed it, he may be just as afraid of telling you what he's into as you are of telling him. Somebody has to be the one to mention it and ask if the other has any interest in this. 

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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 3/26/2010 4:32:57 PM   
RealSub58


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FR w/o reading thread..................

One of my mother's caregivers and I have become good friends and we share a lot of different things.
We had a discussion about what "kink" was? 
I began to ask of her ~ is getting fucked in the ass kink?  ~ is sucking cock kink?
Yes to both questions came from her mind and mouth.

Kink is in the mind of what experiences people have, IMHO
                                                                                     

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RE: Proposing Kinky Sex To A Vanilla Date - 4/21/2010 5:04:21 PM   
SlaveSubtoserve


Posts: 282
Joined: 6/21/2006
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I have enjoyed some success with vanilla women channeling kink into a very strong 'worshipful' dynamic for them......this can usually be tested out a priori via email teases to see if there is any potential receptiveness .....enveloping things like bondage, light discipline, light obedience into worshipping her seems to open the door especially with some who are fatigued with their vanilla dates, recently divorced, etc. ....while its helped make some dates quite fun, it has yet to 'convert' any for more than a short period unfort.

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