RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission

RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (Full Version)

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wisdomtogive -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 8:05:56 AM)
In the beginning of our relationship, Sir had me read a lot of BDSM material, and the 9 degrees of submission was included. He wanted my opinion on the things i read, so we could discuss them. These degrees to me might work for the person who wrote them, but for me it seemed to give guidelines that could hinder more then aid a submissive. Submission is not true or fake, because someone else sees it that way. For the person who is submissive it is true to them. Imo, there is not a better one; submissive or slave, nor the degree one can actively live as one. When i first came to cm. and realized there were variety of different submissives here who were happy, i began to realize that no book version, or listing of what is true/real verses wannabee can be held accountable in this girl's life. i am who i am and that makes me not any better then another. Perhaps one day we may embrace all the varieties of human beings, in this case submissives, without saying oh you aren't real because you haven't yet inspired to submit to the degree i have, or you don't submit to the degree i do.

lally2 -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 8:07:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl quote: ORIGINAL: crazyml Secondly what is the purpose of doing the classification? - Is it about hierarchy - "the higher your number the more 'real' your submission"? It's to weed out the ones that aren't TWUE submissives. sorry - but the only time any idea of heirachy here is created is when it gets injected into a discussion. i didnt see it that way at all. its more about levels of submission or as the title says 'degrees' - i get alot of flack from people because i have quite a posh accent - people assume im a toffy nosed snob and that because of my accent i see myself as better than others - its so annoying and so not true. just because one person enjoys the occasional play situation and another person enjoys TPE Ms doesnt make them any truer or more than anyone else, it just makes them differently orientated.

lally2 -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 8:09:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wisdomtogive In the beginning of our relationship, Sir had me read a lot of BDSM material, and the 9 degrees of submission was included. He wanted my opinion on the things i read, so we could discuss them. These degrees to me might work for the person who wrote them, but for me it seemed to give guidelines that could hinder more then aid a submissive. Submission is not true or fake, because someone else sees it that way. For the person who is submissive it is true to them. Imo, there is not a better one; submissive or slave, nor the degree one can actively live as one. When i first came to cm. and realized there were variety of different submissives here who were happy, i began to realize that no book version, or listing of what is true/real verses wannabee can be held accountable in this girl's life. i am who i am and that makes me not any better then another. Perhaps one day we may embrace all the varieties of human beings, in this case submissives, without saying oh you aren't real because you haven't yet inspired to submit to the degree i have, or you don't submit to the degree i do. well said. xx

MasterXMagnum -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 10:23:57 AM)
quote: ETA: how many degrees of domming are there, OP?? Lively discussion here, I like that. No one wants to be "pigeon holed" I can see, but then, as noted, everyone DOES have their own individual level of... what, "involvement" or "immersion" into this lifestyle, and maybe some broad labels are helpful for some. But then the moment you try to nail down what is essentially a very individual engagement with their personal desires, then others can quibble with it's accuracy. As to the question there, doubtless it's the same as submission. There's as many levels of responsibility one person is willing to take for another as there are levels of surrender to that notion. Labels don't hurt, per se, just making them count too much does.

vagabonddom -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 10:46:43 AM)
One good word to describe the Nine Degrees of Submissive. POPPYCOCK

SimplyMichael -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 10:48:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterXMagnum That noted, does categorization have a value? This sort of list is very important to a certain group of dominants, mainly those who can't inspire but are talented at the creative uses of manipulation and guilt. Note how almost all the levels below "obeys whatever dumpass ideas I come up with" are derogatory? This list is a tool for manipulating gullible people into obeying things they would otherwise laugh at out of fear of being a "pseudo" whatever... The list is hogwash and it would have been nice if it had died with Castlerealm which is where I think this crap spawned from.

heartcream -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 11:04:47 AM)
I like grocery lists, they help me remember what I need when I get there otherwise I get home and I am like, "Oh darn, I needed... and I didnt get it!"

Nslavu -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 11:19:48 AM)
I like self adhesive labels myself. The labels some people try to throw at you in some psycho mounting exercise, they just fall to the ground with all the other shit. What good are they?

lally2 -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 12:31:32 PM)
what i want to know is, who hid The Nine Degrees of Dominance - cos some of us subs are truely confused on who to submit to - i realise that to keep us confused works on oh so many levels, but its a tad unfair!

RavenMuse -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 12:54:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lally2 what i want to know is, who hid The Nine Degrees of Dominance - Doms are like Spinal Tap... We go AAAAALLLLLL the way to 11 [:D]

Jeffff -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 12:57:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RavenMuse quote: ORIGINAL: lally2 what i want to know is, who hid The Nine Degrees of Dominance - Doms are like Spinal Tap... We go AAAAALLLLLL the way to 11 [:D] It's one more! Nigel

Justme696 -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 1:09:16 PM)
I don't like lists with numbers since I left school

afkarr -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 1:20:49 PM)
That list is nothning more than a long winded psuedo academic sounding re-hash of the timeless discussion of "real" vs. "fake" submissives, most likely created by the one and only weal twue MasterWannabe as a means of coercing somebody into doing something they didn't want to just to prove they were "real". My submission being nothing more than someone elses playdate is irrelevant if we aren't playing together. Dynamics and degrees are as unique as the people involved, and as long as they are both getting their needs met, that's all that really matters.

MasterXMagnum -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 1:39:49 PM)
quote: Castlerealm which is where I think this crap spawned from. Actually it does predate Castle Realm, although in this current iteration it probably does closely match what was on there. It actually began as 7 degrees and grew from there. It was once attributed to a lady I even met and quasi interviewed for a bit of BBS style journalism back in the early 90's whose name escapes me now, Nancy something I think but I wouldn't go to Vegas on it. And SHE even said she'd heard it attributed to her before but it wasn't hers. She was in her 50's back then and I couldn't find a hint of her online <shrug> She was semi-famous in the early community for appearing "out" on a few TV shows back when it was oh so very shocking. This was before the WWW by some years, although the original newnets allowed some of us BBS'ers into the lifestyle to get to know one another across time zones. There were a lot of things that were supposed to be vitally important back then that I've been pulling out of boxes I've had stored for a few years since my wife passed. Contracts, checklists, you name it. Ultimately, no, these can't define a relationship in any details as everyone finds their own balance and who their other is in a detail that transcends such broad categorizations. For the uninitiated, it was helpful, to try and envision a place their desires might take them. But actually doing it is all that really reveals the inner beast. It may not be useful for you, though. And that's understandable. It's more of a historical artifact to me as well, but I'm glad we had this talk ::grin:: Magnum

SimplyMichael -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 1:54:21 PM)
Sorry but this sort of crap wasn't around before the internet...and bragging about how early you were on bulletin boards doesn't carry much weight around here as many here did this at real bars back when sex was new and we had to kill dinosaurs to get our leathers.

Jeffff -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 1:57:08 PM)
The Old Gourd kept a list. if they find someone claiming to be them or know them, they creep in and kill them at night. Just a heads up

SimplyMichael -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 2:06:46 PM)
As a member of that most ancient house, the 12th Order, the Old Gourd knows better than to question me.

LadyAngelika -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 3:27:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael ..we had to kill dinosaurs to get our leathers. Uh huh. And the best floggers were made from the brunt-o-sor-ass ;-) - LA

Jeffff -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 3:34:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael ..we had to kill dinosaurs to get our leathers. Uh huh. And the best floggers were made from the brunt-o-sor-ass ;-) - LA Ouch

cloudboy -> RE: The Nine Degrees of Submission (3/23/2010 4:14:54 PM)
I've been working on a thesis that will describe "do-me" Domme's and Doms. What got me thinking about this was a femdom commenting on how she doesn't want to do "D/s" in a restaurant when she's eating out. She did not want to be saddled with "Mistress 'responsibilities'" there. Instead of telling her sub what to eat and engaging in power exchange at the dinner table, she just wanted to have dinner with man who'd be polite, considerate, and conscientious (to make the meal go well.) When subs show similar inclinations, though, its often cast in a derogatory light -- aka not being really a slave or a submissive. In the end, you enter a relationship for the other person -- not a set of BDSM codes. So for me, if I'm out to dinner, I mostly want good conversation, even it its just with a "do-me" Domme who only wants to do D/s or BDSM when "she's in the mood."

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