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seekingOwnertoo -> RE: The Difference between Men and Boys (3/29/2010 9:56:28 AM)
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quote:
Actually it sort of missed the point of my OP and of course, the digression that ensued just brought the point further away.
What I'm trying to discuss here really is not pet names. I was hoping we would discuss a difference between men and boys as what they represent in terms of integrity and, with that, to which degree we are subverting the notion of man/boy by calling him a boy.
More and more I am liking the idea of man. In fact, I have this notion in my mind that it's actually hotter to dominate a man than a boy.
Lady A – since I was very much involved in the digression from Your point, let me make an attempt to address my current perception of it; and hopefully, help get this back on track.
To begin with, there are probably as many definitions of the difference between the words man and boy, as there are people who use the words. Some will have similar understanding of the meaning of each, others, will not. That said, I think it is important to understand my definition of the word man.
I believe a man strives for self mastery. With self mastery defined as the perfect synthesis of the classical aristocratic master, and the humble, hard working slave. (This description is descended from Hegal and his philosophy.)
Thus the traits You would see, include, but are not limited to: chivalry, strength, self motivation and hard work, the ability to listen to others and adapt, caring and compassion for others, as well as the ability to use reason to overcome his desires and his ego. (the latter a very Socratic/Hegal concept).
There are many more traits that could be added here … so feel free to add Your own.
To such a man, it is immaterial whether he is called boy, or man, by a Woman. He is not fazed by it. He operates on his own compass … and he has his own measures of his success or failure to live up to his ideal. He charts his own course though the stormy seas of life.
However, I am sure You will agree, that not a lot of males aspire to such lofty defined goals for themselves.
So one aspect of Your post might be suggesting, that when Women refer to males as “boys”, Women might be inadvertently encouraging lessor developed males to be satisfied with themselves as boys; rather than to grow and develop into more mature, capable, self determined beings.
Because boys are clearly influenced by what the Ladies think.
And while I think this may be true in some instances … boys are as much influenced by peer group thinking, (aka frat boy), as they are when Women refer to them as boys.
Although for these types of males, a strong Woman can really influence their minds … over time, too.
So I believe I have addressed two aspects of Your post.
1. Traits You might see in a man;
2. Do Women subvert the notion of man, by calling a male a boy.
My conclusion is … it depends on the individual … their own development in the journey to self actualization (aka Maslow) … as well as their awareness of, and desire to, achieve it.
Hope this post is on topic … because I really tried to understand what You were asking … this time.
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