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Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 3:30:14 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		When I think of growth, I tend to think in terms of 'gain' in some area. Whether that's a new experience or a new discovery, perverting a new toy :)  .. whatever it is, it's a new flavor to add into the BDSM vat that is my life.  But, of course, gaining knowledge of self is also finding new limits or finding out that something you used to enjoy is no longer enjoyable, especially when you've gone into burn out mode from over indulgence or something even more common -  the fantasy you've always had which should have stayed a fantasy for you because the reality was nothing like you thought it was going to be.

Which sort of growth do you find more beneficial? Gaining a new experience or gaining new insight into self even if that means you're limiting future experiences? Any other thoughts on the subject of growth?

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 3:39:32 PM   
CERCKL


Posts: 1039
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline 		I embrace ALL growth. Experiential as well as intellectual/spiritual/emotional as I don't see them as seperate...nor do I define My growth as 'BDSM' per se. Self awareness, though painful at times is what I tend towards...burning away the Maya in My life and seeking that which is true...as for expectations not living up to the actual experiences, letting go of My expectations is also important as the attachment is usually the root of a lot of dissapointment. Just as the fear of something is usually larger than experiencing it...
Namaste,
C

_____________________________

AND I AM TOO AN ASSHOLE, I HAVE REFERENCES!!!

"Please, please, please believe me, I really am an asshole. All that Enlightenment and Higher Learning shit was all a ruse."

(in reply to BitaTruble)
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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 3:50:28 PM   
slaveladyj


Posts: 161
Joined: 2/7/2006
Status: offline 		Every experience we have during the days of our life can and should be a learning experience. There is always more in life to learn, see and do. We should never stop growing in an intellectual way. Never been intolerant of things we don't understand, but look at those things as a way to learn more about the world we live in.

(in reply to BitaTruble)
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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 3:51:00 PM   
LadiesBladewing


Posts: 944
Joined: 8/31/2005
Status: offline 		Growth just -is-. Sometimes it moves us forward, and sometimes it causes us to step away from something we've thought we wanted to approach. All of it is important, and while there are lessons that serve us greatly in the immediacy and may not serve much purpose down the road, the lessons learned are always valuable. In the same way, some lessons we learn seem to bear no real value now (or we don't even recognize them as having been learned), until some situation arises in which our newly obtained understanding is put to the test, and we find ourselves able to thrive in a situation that might have decimated us just a year before.

The most important part about growth is to dismiss none of it, and to consider it an ongoing process that will never end. It is all about self-knowledge, whether that knowledge be about specific aspects of our lives, or about the generalities of how we perceive ourselves and our world.

Here's to expansion of our growth.

Lady Zephyr

_____________________________


"Should have", "could have", "would have" and "can't" may be the most dangerous phrases in the English language.
Bladewing Enclave

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 4:17:46 PM   
MsIncognito


Posts: 742
Joined: 5/24/2005
Status: offline 		I don't think one is more beneficial than the other. Rather I think they are two sides of the same coin. Sometimes being able to move forward means sloughing off some of the past - either good or bad - in order to do so.  It's kind of like a snake shedding it's skin - even though that skin was very useful it has outlived it's usefulness and needs to be shed in order for growth to continue. 

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 4:25:22 PM   
truesub4u


Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		Growth is learning... when I stop learning... will be the day I draw my last breath. 

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 5:31:18 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

Which sort of growth do you find more beneficial? Gaining a new experience or gaining new insight into self even if that means you're limiting future experiences? Any other thoughts on the subject of growth?

Celeste


i used to be afraid of growth and change.  i was afraid of new experiences and afraid to look inside myself.  Since Master came into my life, my life has been all about new experiences and self awareness/self analysis.  i believe both of what you said - experience and insight are important.  However, while gaining new insight into self might limit experiences, that new insight is its own experience, is it not?  Ultimately for me, my new experiences cause me to gain strength, insight, awareness, knowledge and even courage, which assists me in my ultimate goal - to be the best person i can be, and the best slave for Him that i can be. 

(in reply to BitaTruble)
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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 5:53:14 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		Growth comes in many different ways... some ways are better than others at any given situation.  Sometimes the hard way is the only way to learn... sometimes we learn it the easy way.

But, in the end  "Growth is Achieved and I am happy for that and find that beneficial."

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 5:58:59 PM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline 		I see growth as gaining new insights into self, anything and everything in life (experiences) can be used to that end.

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/2/2006 7:46:13 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble
Which sort of growth do you find more beneficial? Gaining a new experience or gaining new insight into self even if that means you're limiting future experiences? Any other thoughts on the subject of growth?

Celeste

The two are so connected that I don't think I'd separate them.  To borrow a bad example- one can only stay locked in a cave looking at puppet shadows for so long.  I'm just the type of person who needs to break out.  There's a time for doing and there's a time to reflect on what you do.

Growth to me is when I become more of myself-this happens through both being and doing.


_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/5/2006 9:16:39 PM   
acctonthelook


Posts: 245
Joined: 3/28/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

Which sort of growth do you find more beneficial? Gaining a new experience or gaining new insight into self even if that means you're limiting future experiences? Any other thoughts on the subject of growth?

Celeste


If we are potty trained before learning to walk, how would we get there? 
 
Growth in any way shape of form is important to molding and shaping our lives for the better. 
 
Every person we meet, every article or literature we read, every emotional & physical experience we discover, every post here allows for growth.
 
As long as we search or discover anything new, we find growth.
 
 

(in reply to BitaTruble)
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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/5/2006 10:34:39 PM   
ArtCatDom


Posts: 478
Joined: 1/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

When I think of growth, I tend to think in terms of 'gain' in some area. Whether that's a new experience or a new discovery, perverting a new toy :)  .. whatever it is, it's a new flavor to add into the BDSM vat that is my life.  But, of course, gaining knowledge of self is also finding new limits or finding out that something you used to enjoy is no longer enjoyable, especially when you've gone into burn out mode from over indulgence or something even more common -  the fantasy you've always had which should have stayed a fantasy for you because the reality was nothing like you thought it was going to be.

Which sort of growth do you find more beneficial? Gaining a new experience or gaining new insight into self even if that means you're limiting future experiences? Any other thoughts on the subject of growth?

Celeste


I think you've touched on something essential. Growth is not simply an accumulation, nor is it just a collection of positive gains. We often hear how bad experiences have made someone grow, yet I think few give much consideration to the idea in depth.

I think the most beneficial growth is anything that improves us as a person, clarifies our view of the world or increases our self-awareness. Some of the most negative and painful experiences in my life have been the foundation for the growth of positive aspects of my personality and have revealed to me eseential bits of myself.

I think the gaining of experiences and the growth of self-awareness are intrinsically linked. The more we experience, the more context we have to understand ourselves and the world around us.

Just some brief unorganized thoughts.

*meow*

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/5/2006 10:35:56 PM   
ArtCatDom


Posts: 478
Joined: 1/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble
Which sort of growth do you find more beneficial? Gaining a new experience or gaining new insight into self even if that means you're limiting future experiences? Any other thoughts on the subject of growth?

Celeste

The two are so connected that I don't think I'd separate them.  To borrow a bad example- one can only stay locked in a cave looking at puppet shadows for so long.  I'm just the type of person who needs to break out.  There's a time for doing and there's a time to reflect on what you do.

Growth to me is when I become more of myself-this happens through both being and doing.



Not a bad example at all!! But then again, I love Plato's allegories. :)

*meow*

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/5/2006 10:40:59 PM   
PrinceSitri


Posts: 99
Joined: 3/28/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ArtCatDom


quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

When I think of growth, I tend to think in terms of 'gain' in some area. Whether that's a new experience or a new discovery, perverting a new toy :)  .. whatever it is, it's a new flavor to add into the BDSM vat that is my life.  But, of course, gaining knowledge of self is also finding new limits or finding out that something you used to enjoy is no longer enjoyable, especially when you've gone into burn out mode from over indulgence or something even more common -  the fantasy you've always had which should have stayed a fantasy for you because the reality was nothing like you thought it was going to be.

Which sort of growth do you find more beneficial? Gaining a new experience or gaining new insight into self even if that means you're limiting future experiences? Any other thoughts on the subject of growth?

Celeste


I think you've touched on something essential. Growth is not simply an accumulation, nor is it just a collection of positive gains. We often hear how bad experiences have made someone grow, yet I think few give much consideration to the idea in depth.

I think the most beneficial growth is anything that improves us as a person, clarifies our view of the world or increases our self-awareness. Some of the most negative and painful experiences in my life have been the foundation for the growth of positive aspects of my personality and have revealed to me eseential bits of myself.

I think the gaining of experiences and the growth of self-awareness are intrinsically linked. The more we experience, the more context we have to understand ourselves and the world around us.

Just some brief unorganized thoughts.

*meow*


I couldn't agree more. Bravo!


_____________________________

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
Albert Einstein

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/6/2006 12:15:27 AM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Two thoughts came to mind when reading this post.  The concept in Paganism of Duality and the Hindu Trinity of Deities that represent creation, preservation and destruction.
 
Duality is a concept of two sides that are interconnected and cyclical in Nature.
Light and darkness, female and male, action and reaction. In relation to your question, external experience or internal introspection...hmm...
 
The Hindu Trinity also mirrors the Cycles of Life, birth, life and death.
And from the ashes and seeds of death comes the next cycle of life.
 
I think that both types of growth are beneficial.  And it is an appropriate
question for springtime, Celeste. 
 
Time for sleep, I am rambling here.
 
Be well A/all,
 
-Vendaval-
 
 
 
 
 
 

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

Which sort of growth do you find more beneficial? Gaining a new experience or gaining new insight into self even if that means you're limiting future experiences? Any other thoughts on the subject of growth?

Celeste


_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/6/2006 1:04:05 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		First, I'd like thank you all for the wonderful responses. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy a passionate debate on a variety of issues, but it's nice to have a feel good thread on occasion as well and that's what this one has done for me.

I think it's only fair that I answer my own question. :)

I find that while I gain some growth from experience, what I gain from insight into self is leaps and bounds above it. Learning the history of piercing, how it relates to the Indian half of my ancestry, the spiritual connection which opened up to me ... well, suffice to say that the actual experience of being pierced was incomparable to what came afterwards. The experience itself was vital to my growth because without it I wouldn't have undertaken the journey I did to learn more, but measure for measure, it was only the first step. I've found that many experiences for me are like that.. they are first steps to something more and it's generally the 'more' which improves my knowledge base of self, even when the 'more' somehow limits me. Well, there's my 2 cents. :)

Thank you all again,

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to BitaTruble)
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RE: Two sides of growth - 4/6/2006 8:41:58 AM   
scratchingpost


Posts: 231
Joined: 11/16/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: truesub4u

Growth is learning... when I stop learning... will be the day I draw my last breath. 


I tend to agree. The only time we stop learning is the time we stop experiencing life...

_____________________________

be safe and smile
purrrs kitty
(=^.^=)
www.misskittys-scratchingpost.com

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