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ORIGINAL: BoiJen

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ORIGINAL: Wolf2Bear

Quite interesting when women bitch and complain that they are always the one who has to suffer morning sickness, stretch marks, intense labor pains and men don't. Yet when a male does have the ability to carry a fetus to term, women bitch and complain that he isn't a "true" male.  No wonder there will never be gender equality. By all accounts Beatie and his wife are happy decent parents and too damn bad many can't give them credit for that.

I'm really not trying to bitch (and I don't identify as a woman) I'm stating an opinion on a personal exploitation this person has chosen to take. This person purposefully put themself in the news over this issue. This person repeatedly makes large, national announcements about the state of this person's pregnancies.

I will say, I understand a transman helping his wife by having one child if his wife couldn't have them. I *get* that. That is an act of love of trying to create a fulfilling situation for his wife. Repeatedly having kids is a female act. Period. It's not a male act at all. To go further and to make a public spectacle every time this person gets pregnant is an even bigger issue that's gonna lead to this person's kids being tormented. Which bothers me on a whole 'nother level.

If they make great parents, good! Great! Fabulous! I am happy as hell about it. However, I doubt their ability to maintain their are "good parents" because of what this public exposure is going to put their kids through.

Anyways, parenting and the kids aren't actually the focus of the topic, gender is.

Thanks for commenting though, I'll be interested in how this situation develops for the kids cuz something tells me, this purposeful exposure by the parents isn't going to change.

As a boi, you're never gonna find me pregnant. I have no desire. And that you can take to the bank. *Wanting* to be pregnant is a gender oriented act.

boi

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ORIGINAL: BoiJen

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ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

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ORIGINAL: BoiJen

Even as a gender queer individual, it's hard for me to swallow a person declaring they are male and then doing the one thing men can't do. I'm just under the personal impression that men don't *have* kids and *women* do. Therefor, to me, he must be female.

That's my opinion.

boi

This is what happens with the polarization of gender. There are only 2 boxes to tick so you ultimately have to pick one gender or another even if the gender description doesn't describe you completely. As Kate Bornstein would say, ze is what ze is :-)

- LA

I think there's a difference between sex and gender as well, though. There really are only two sexes within the human species, this is dictated by anatomy. Gender is how we identify ourselves based on how we feel. To declare one's self a man as a gender identity, then there's certain things that go along with that. Getting pregnant isn't one of them.

Does that make sense?

boi

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ORIGINAL: BoiJen
Most Americans who are gonna see this issue aren't going to see it as a gay issue. Most Americans actually have a big line distinction in their head from gay and trans issues.

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ORIGINAL: BoiJen
To add to that, a large portion of the trans community (at least those whom I associate with) don't consider this person part of their community because this person is not acting within the traditional confines of "man", which is what this person professes to want to be.

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ORIGINAL: BoiJen
Your jump in consequences has little to do with how the majority of individuals in the US are gonna see this issue. And because of that, I would say the jump is not appropriate, rather, it's purposefully inflammatory.

Just sayin...

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Most Americans who are gonna see this issue aren't going to see it as a gay issue. Most Americans actually have a big line distinction in their head from gay and trans issues.

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ORIGINAL: Wolf2Bear

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ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

A question, Wolf...

Would a decent parent make a mockery of their child? Imagine what these poor kids will have to go through later in life.

The thing is, I read the article in that link and I didn't read anything where they were making a mockery of their children. The only mockery that I've seen is people making a mockery of the  desire for Beatie and his partner wanting to have children biologically. We alos can't forget that it is us parenbts who have the responsibility to teach our offspring the necessary tools they need to cope with life when they are full grown adults. It's up to Beatie and his partner to reach their children to deal with the harsh cruelties they will face in life....same way our parents done with us when we were being raised.

I am the first to admit that in the past 10 years, my definition of what is male and what is female has been challenged more then I had ever imagined. It is a tough thing to comprehend that genitalia dos not define outr gender. I have to give a lot of credit to many people in mhy circle of friends who do not fit the standard definition of male or female also a few people on these boards also helped to educate me and broaden my concept of male, female and all the places in between.

I just have a tough time trying to understand how people who are open minded enough to engage in many forms of kink and even consent to allow another control all aspects of their life yet these same people are quick to ridcule and judge a person like Beatie for bearing children. I had hoped that we as a loose collective woulfd be more understanding give another the benefit of a doubt. Obviously I am deluding myself as that hasn't happened.