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SimplyMichael -> RE: Could someone please explain this term to me. (4/3/2010 4:53:23 PM)
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The following post contains 100% recycled materials
quote:
I love taking care of my women, I love being vulnerable in an emotional sense as well as being touched and pleasured. I do not like meek submissives and tend to pick very opinionated and powerful women as my partners. In trying to be as open as I can be to the possibilities life brings us and not to live the life of a label, I have often wondered if I was submissive or at least wondered how strong those desires were.
Not very as I found out last night. Some friends of mine, a dear couple, are competing for title of Master/slave and we had a community fundraiser for them which was done as a slave auction. Archer suggested that well known dominants bring the biggest money when the offer to bottom and so in the spirit of things I had myself auctioned off both as a top and as a bottom.
I had feared for the worse as there are some women who despise me (shocking I know) and think I am an arrogant bastard and who I figured would do anything for the chance to beat me. They didn’t show but there were still enough that wanted to beat my ass that the bidding was lively. Just as it slowed down and I was about to be sold, a dark horse who hadn’t uttered a peep upped the bid a large amount and won me. OH FUCKING SHIT!!! This woman is a serious submissive who goes back to some darker earlier days and played heavily in San Francisco and who was a serious pain slut. While I adored her, I did so because of that experience but I had no idea what the hell she was going to do to me. In an effort to be bold, I had set my limits as; no sex, no penetration, and no intentional marks figuring I could expand or contract those depending on who it was.
Problem I had was my respect and trust for this woman runs deep and my most primal scene ever had been with her and I had no idea what she wanted to do. I soon found out, WAX PLAY and I thought “piece of cake”. I haven’t done a lot of intense wax play, I have played with it but never done a long serious scene but I know the basics. I didn’t get the basics, they didn’t rub me with mineral oil but at least they were sticking to my back. OH FUCKING SHIT! They poured a long heavy run down the back of my hair leg, then the other. Everyone was laughing as I loudly lamented how fucking bad it was going to hurt coming off.
In my head though, as much as I care for this woman, I realized I had none of the feelings I would expect from a submissive, there wasn’t anything erotic, my mind didn’t want to make the bitch happy or pleased, I was getting nothing out of this. However, “getting nothing” I realized later was a massive gift, it gave me a clarity about myself that I didn’t have prior to bottoming and it has made me a better dominant. I have never been one to say bottoming makes you better but I won’t ever dismiss it again either.
Back to the scene. I am now covered with wax, I am naked and they made sure to get it deeply into my ass crack so I am totally fucked. She shows a bit of mercy and uses a razor sharp knife to cut much of the wax away but the stuff in my ass and on my balls I am just going to have to deal with.
It wasn’t until I went to shower off that I realized it have been a complete mindfuck and it wasn’t wax but hot water. The woman is good, I never clued in. The laughter hadn’t been at me getting covered in wax but the fact that there was NO wax and I was whining about it hurting when it came off.
It was an amazing night. I also got to beat a well known dominant who nobody would ever believe allowed it. Takes a lot of balls and self confidence to do what she did but hers are bigger than many. I also had a couple buy me to mentor them and that was a lot of fun as well.
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