RE: 1st post - Depressed (Full Version)

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she100 -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/15/2010 4:12:55 AM)

quote:

Be aware that the treatment for depression can cause some problems with libido and/or the ability to reach orgasm. If this happens, ask the psychiatrist to switch your meds.


I did ask about being worried about losing my libido and he said that it isn't a side effect but may happen, anyway reading the side effects one being depression! It does also mention an increase in sexual appetite bizzarly.

I have realised since posting in here that my Dom is actually controlling me and giving the guidance I need, just not in the preconcieved way I wanted or expectected!!! So maybe He really does know what's best for me.

In answer to RS yes it can be contagious! I am an empath and catch everyones thoughts and emotions and it can be a real bummer! But being empath can also be used to my advantage and theirs ;)



MajesticVertigo -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/15/2010 6:26:10 PM)

Parts of your original post sounds a lot like me. This is my first d/s relationship that's been going on for about 8 months now. My family doesn't even know I'm in any sort of relationship. And I had been the happiest I have been in a long time since being with him. He is one of a handful of people who have ever seen me cry. I've always suppressed my emotions, part of my own upbringing. Right before easter I had been feeling down and I've been going down further since to outright depression to the point where I have a hard time functioning and completely exhausted. Luckily I have a master who is completely supportive and told me flat out I should get therapy and go on meds. I found a therapist who is known in the local d/s community and I will be meeting with her for next week. I am still fighting the meds though master thinks I will need them since this isn't the first time I've suffered from depression, though it is the worst.

I was going to create my own thread, but I didn't think two threads about depression were necessary.

I wish the best of luck to you in getting better.



she100 -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/16/2010 3:11:05 PM)

Hi MV, i can relate to the suppressed emotions and think that has a lot to do with this being my 1st D/s relationship ,and facing my true self and them emotions are all coming out! Been prone to bouts of depression in the past but always been able to get on top till now.

I can't and won't reccomend taking meds cos it has taken me months to come round to the idea , hate the idea of taking some pill that is going to change my neuroligical pattern. but have to say i feel good that i have finally now excepted that maybe this time it won't hurt to take some outside help.

Would love to know how it goes with the therepy as this is something i am considering...

Also have been reading up on sub space and how the 'come down' after can cause depression so i am thinking along the lines that - 1st D/s relationship, hightened state of arousal, facing true emotions, plus past shit is all accountable for present state of mind!

Wish you all the best xxx




thelustfulsub -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/17/2010 1:34:01 AM)

There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking anti-depressants to help supplement/kick-start therapy. The problem with medication is that some people use it as another crutch without getting the help they really need. Depression is usually an emotional response to something going on in your life. Some people are more prone to it because of biological factors (such as having an excess number of serotonin reuptake cells in their brain), and some feel this way as a reaction to long term distress. Please note that SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, and probably what your doctor prescribed for you) take two to three weeks to really work. You will also want to start seeing a therapist or therapy group. Medication can't do it alone forever, if you are truly clinically depressed then you need to learn what your triggers are, how to avoid them, and how to deal with them when you can't avoid them. The most important thing right now is to take the medication you were prescribed (every day at the same time, just like birth control) and seek some kind of support/therapy. Also, once you realize that you are NOT helpless and that you CAN do something about your situation you will begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel and truly start to heal.

Ask your GP for a referral to a psychologist or psychiatrist. (I recommend seeing both, a psychiatrist who can handle your meds and a psychologist who will help you explore the cause of your depression and learn about your triggers). Yes, sometimes anti-depressants will lower your sex drive. If this happens contact your doctor/psychiatrist and talk about trying another kind. People react differently to different anti-depressants. They're not a miracle drug, sometimes you need to try a few before you find the right combination and strength. This is why it is extra important to go to a psychiatrist and not just a GP since most doctors don't learn much about mental illnesses and their treatments.

Please PM me if you ever need to talk. I mean it! There's nothing worse about being depressed than feeling alone.



marsneedswomen -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/18/2010 4:21:32 PM)

BDSM is not a replacement for psychological help or therapy. If you are depressed, get diagnosed as soon as possible. Some forms of depression do not require medication, but depression does need supervision by a professional. BDSM and depression are two separate issues, treat them as such and you will be fine.



domiguy -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/18/2010 4:31:49 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: she100

I am an empath and catch everyones thoughts and emotions and it can be a real bummer! But being empath can also be used to my advantage and theirs ;)


Yeah. that sucks. I am an empath, too.



LookieNoNookie -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/18/2010 4:52:26 PM)

Don't worry, after your second post it gets even more depressing.



marie2 -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/18/2010 5:04:57 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: she100

He feels passion and excitement for me but I do not feel these emotions for Him.

I don't feel I am receiving the Dominance that I need to keep me sane and balanced.


Maybe you're feeling depressed because you are having to come to the realization that you may not be compatible?



sweetnurseBBW -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/18/2010 11:30:13 PM)

As someone that has had issues with depression, get that dealt with first. You cannot deal with relationships until you take care of yourself first. Get into counseling and deal with the depression.



DMFParadox -> RE: 1st post - Depressed (4/19/2010 11:43:03 PM)

Sounds to me like he's not playing the game right.

Even M/s relationships - ESPECIALLY M/s relationships - obey the laws of attraction. You feel safe, warm and cuddly, but the spice is missing? The answer is that he's accepted you without challenging you enough. And proving himself. Then challenging again, going into comfort with you and then taking you out of it (in a good way), making you guess what his next move will be, giving you unexpected hints of compliments without spelling them out and making you work to hear them, etc. No man - well, damn few men - are exempt from this. I'm pretty sure that sub men have to do something along these lines too, though trying to think how it would work breaks my brain. Not in my wiring. Anyway, the dance of attraction is universal, and your man missed a few steps. Not to fret! This can be fixed. Have him pick up 'Magic Bullets' or any RSD books/videotapes, with an eye towards applying the approach to you. Fair warning, RSD self-promotes as a crew of pick up artists, but in my experience the techniques work as well or better with someone you're already in a relationship with.

Cheers, and a toast to reviving the magic.



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