Spanking, playing rough, but not really 'feelin' it

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All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> Spanking, playing rough, but not really 'feelin' it

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Spanking, playing rough, but not really 'feelin' it - 4/16/2010 4:42:44 AM

SomethingCatchy

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Joined: 7/29/2008
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I switch in my relationship with Tink every now and then, but it's usually restricted to the bedroom. There's just something really hot about my big muscly guy picking me up, throwing me around, and having his way with me.

Back story -

We've been reconstructing our relationship after a 6 month deployment on his end, and some emotional and physical problems on my end before the deployment (BC shot messed me up pretty bad). We agreed that we'd take it easy on sex and just let it happen as it would, and I've been able to relax and enjoy my time with him instead of feeling that I need to use sex as a glue to hold our relationship together.

The other day I really wanted an emotional connection with him that I usually get with sex, so I told him I'd like work towards having sex with him that evening. Things were going very well, despite him being very stressed over work, and I was very relaxed. We ended up talking about my butt and how we both like it, that lead to me on the bed being spanked. I love being spanked, I really love the burn from the pain, and he brought out my favorite toy to use on him - a riding crop - and used it on me a few times.

The thing is, throughout all of this, some how I ended up getting wet and was able to have sex with him, but I was devoid of any desire. If I hadn't of checked for myself, I wouldn't have known I was wet! I enjoyed the sex with him even though I was nervous after some pain, and I got the emotional connection I'd been craving, but I'm kind of baffled by my 'meh' attitude towards it.

Despite my personal problems, has anyone experienced anything like this?

On the plus side... today is VACATION DAY! A solid week of me and my favorite person and our three dogs crammed into hotel rooms and enjoying my home town! I plan on coming home with some tan lines!

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RE: Spanking, playing rough, but not really 'feelin' it - 4/16/2010 4:46:54 AM

DesFIP

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Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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Stress. That and the fact that women usually need the emotional intimacy first in order to enjoy sex whereas men usually need sex first to then achieve emotional intimacy.

Next time cuddle first.

And enjoy your week off.

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RE: Spanking, playing rough, but not really 'feelin' it - 4/16/2010 5:30:46 AM

DarkSteven

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Joined: 5/2/2008
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What DesFIP said, plus the fact that your emotions were still out of whack after a long dry period. And possibly residual effects from the shot.

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RE: Spanking, playing rough, but not really 'feelin' it - 4/16/2010 5:53:37 AM

GraciousLady

Posts: 529
Joined: 7/7/2009
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I think this is a good opertunity for the two of you to be romantic, get reaquainted and enjoy each others company in all ways. Once you two get back in the swing of things it will all fall into place. You've already gotten off to a good start by making that emotional cponnection. Enjoy!

(in reply to SomethingCatchy)

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