RE: What is wrong with the world? (Full Version)

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Jeffff -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/18/2010 6:44:24 PM)

I forgive you



Level -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/18/2010 6:56:14 PM)

[8D]

Now, that Bo Jackson, he could do the two sport thing...



cloudboy -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/18/2010 8:38:26 PM)


Compounded by how he then traded Richard Hamilton away for Jerry Stackhouse. A bad omen for Charlotte.



Rule -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/18/2010 10:54:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterK13
Are people too proud or crazy to say "Ok I fucked up I'm sorry." why do they always try shifting blame on to other people

A former friend of mine is not able to admit he did wrong. That is because he cannot live with the realization that he did wrong, for such a realization hurts him very much. Instead he evades the issue by rewriting his reality so he can feel good again. He is able to rewrite his reality because he cannot distinguish truth from lie - which is also the reason why he does wrong so often. As a result he forever lives in his own fantasy reality in which he is the hero and never to blame and where anything that goes wrong is always to be blamed on someone else. He is conning and fooling himself every second of his life.



myotherself -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/18/2010 11:18:09 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterK13

All I'm asking is why if you forgive someone if they do something wrong and they refuse to take responsibility but you still forgive and they dont forgive you even though you are owning up to it?


This is difficult without specifics (which I don't want...truly..), but I'll have a go using what you've given us.

You think this person has done something wrong, despite their denial. You insist they have done something wrong and, ignoring their denial, you forgive them anyway.

Then you screw up, and come clean. So this person, who is still smarting from your lack of trust and high-handed condescension over the earlier incident, chooses not to forgive you.

To be honest, I can see their point. There's a lot of accusation and moral-high-ground-grabbing going on here, and it's all coming from you.

I'm sure there's a lot more tedious detail and drama going on behind the scenes, and to be honest I doubt any of us care enough to wade through it.

But IMHO it boils down to trust. You don't trust them, they resent it, it blows up in your face.

Learn, deal, move on.



Icarys -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/19/2010 6:51:49 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterK13

Are people too proud or crazy to say "Ok I fucked up I'm sorry." why do they always try shifting blame on to other people and when you forgive them and make the same mistake and own up to it they say "I'll never forgive you!" I just dont understand it.

Yes it would be nice if people had compassion and took responsibility for their actions. It would be nice if they were more forgiving and understanding but they aren't. You can choose to tear up, get mad, move on and a number of other reactions. Your choice.


I choose to move on if they don't show what I consider to be good traits in a human being. At the very least I won't let them close to me.



Icarys -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/19/2010 6:54:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself


quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterK13

All I'm asking is why if you forgive someone if they do something wrong and they refuse to take responsibility but you still forgive and they dont forgive you even though you are owning up to it?


This is difficult without specifics (which I don't want...truly..), but I'll have a go using what you've given us.

You think this person has done something wrong, despite their denial. You insist they have done something wrong and, ignoring their denial, you forgive them anyway.

Then you screw up, and come clean. So this person, who is still smarting from your lack of trust and high-handed condescension over the earlier incident, chooses not to forgive you.

To be honest, I can see their point. There's a lot of accusation and moral-high-ground-grabbing going on here, and it's all coming from you.

I'm sure there's a lot more tedious detail and drama going on behind the scenes, and to be honest I doubt any of us care enough to wade through it.

But IMHO it boils down to trust. You don't trust them, they resent it, it blows up in your face.

Learn, deal, move on.


One problem with that...You jump to conclusions even after you said there isn't any specifics.



Marc2b -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/19/2010 7:25:32 AM)

Here's a good read on the subject.



Jinger -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/19/2010 7:39:06 AM)

quote:

Are people too proud or crazy to say "Ok I fucked up I'm sorry." why do they always try shifting blame on to other people and when you forgive them and make the same mistake and own up to it they say "I'll never forgive you!" I just dont understand it.


I tend to forgive everyone that apologizes to me.
It releases me of the negative energy I have toward that person.

But then there are people who have hurt me too deeply, or done things too terrible...and though I can forgive them, I can never truly get over what they've done or said. I think of them differently, I behave differently when I'm around them.

So the question is then, have I truly forgiven them?
Is absolute forgiveness even possible?

One thing is for sure. Absolute regret is.

There will never be a perfect world.




ResidentSadist -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/19/2010 8:26:04 AM)

You are full of shit. My people don't “always try shifting blame on to other people”. When my friends or family make mistakes, they stand accountable saying they are “sorry” and also say, “how can I fix it?”

It must suck to be you and surround by no-account lowlifes. People judge you by the company you keep. I suggest you are due for an upgrade in friends department.



Termyn8or -> RE: What is wrong with the world? (4/25/2010 7:34:00 PM)

FR

Is an apology accepted implied forgiveness ? You are talking to a MF here that could shoot his own Mother right between the eyes, not that I will. I don't even need the appointed words, anything that sounds true and to the effect "it was wrong and I shouldn't have done it" will do. But without that they remain in the crosshairs. A truefelt admission of guilt, an expression of same and the desire to make it up are essential. Without that they will remain sanctioned (ousted that is) and an enemy. And nobody born two thousand fucking years ago is going to change my mind.

They will seek forgiveness when they decide to, and I will not prod them. If I exact regenge from them, remember that I like it served cold. After revenge is extracted I cannot be sure if anything in the way of an apology is real, and uncoerced. It will be alot more difficult to get me to accept it.

I am a hard Man ? You should see some of the people I've dealt with. Some of them simply do not forgive, ever. But that is their perogative.

T



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