AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE

AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (Full Version)

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bdsmnewbie10 -> AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 7:53:07 AM)
Only been in lifestyle about 6 months and with Master the same amount of time. This past weekend, during our meet, I guess I craved a little more correction than normal and found that the harder I desired him to hit or the more I wanted him to cut off my air or gag me, the less excited he got. I'm new...is this unusual? or do I just have a very caring Master?

Miyani -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 8:05:35 AM)
Maybe he's not a sadist. Not all Masters are into causing pain, and the amount of pain they enjoy causing has nothing (in most cases) to do with how much they care for you. Why not talk to him? See if he views himself as a sadist. See what the disconnect was in his enjoyment of the scene. I will say, for me, that when I'm hurting my boy, what's seen as sexual arousal pretty much goes away, but I'm having the time of my life.

poeticfreak -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 8:08:39 AM)
if it's punishment and not play then yes it's very normal, if it's play well there is no normal or abnormal there is only we're both having fun, or we need to talk about things

dreamerdreaming -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 10:46:53 AM)
I personally would find it tedious. Maybe he does, too. [sm=tired.gif] [sm=sleepy.gif] Sounds like he's up for a little bit of it, but not as much as you'd like. So you might be a mismatch, regarding (both of your) desired/needed frequency, intensity or duration.

lally2 -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 1:24:19 PM)
it could be anything really, you should talk to him. suggestions could be: a) hes very caring b) hes not that much into sadism c) he felt he wasnt the one leading the scene and it turned him off d) he didnt feel in control of youre responses and it bothered him or something else - you do need to discuss this with him really

Mercnbeth -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 2:00:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bdsmnewbie10 Only been in lifestyle about 6 months and with Master the same amount of time. This past weekend, during our meet, I guess I craved a little more correction than normal and found that the harder I desired him to hit or the more I wanted him to cut off my air or gag me, the less excited he got. I'm new...is this unusual? or do I just have a very caring Master? the unusual and strange thing about your post, for this slave, is that you feel "lucky" that your escalating craving and wanting and desiring caused Him to be less and less excited...or that His lack of excitement translates to "caring".

PrimalConsonance -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 4:30:39 PM)
I think your assumption that just because he does not get off on inflicting pain means that he "cares", may be a bit wrong-headed. Your level of masochism and his level of sadism may not be compatible. You relationship might end up working or not, but his not wanting to inflict greater pain on you is not by itself an indication of his degree of caring.

lucylucy -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 4:47:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth the unusual and strange thing about your post, for this slave, is that you feel "lucky" that your escalating craving and wanting and desiring caused Him to be less and less excited...or that His lack of excitement translates to "caring". I agree with beth (as usual). I would feel very unlucky in this situation.

DesFIP -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 5:44:04 PM)
I think she feels lucky to be with him, not for this experience. However my best guess is that he's a sadist and doesn't like it when you enjoy it, only when you don't. Why not ask him and find out?

ricken -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 8:16:27 PM)
You need to talk to him, he could have his reasons. He could also still be wrestling with the concept "it's not OK to hurt people" from time to time if he is still dicovering.

sweetboundesire -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 8:47:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth quote: ORIGINAL: bdsmnewbie10 Only been in lifestyle about 6 months and with Master the same amount of time. This past weekend, during our meet, I guess I craved a little more correction than normal and found that the harder I desired him to hit or the more I wanted him to cut off my air or gag me, the less excited he got. I'm new...is this unusual? or do I just have a very caring Master? the unusual and strange thing about your post, for this slave, is that you feel "lucky" that your escalating craving and wanting and desiring caused Him to be less and less excited...or that His lack of excitement translates to "caring". good points.

LPslittleclip -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/19/2010 9:23:36 PM)
have a discussion with Him and explain how you are feeling and how He is feeling and find out what works

bdsmnewbie10 -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/20/2010 6:40:56 AM)
To clarify my level of pain, I thought he wanted me to want more, but guess not. I have discussed it now with Master and have found it's a combination apparently not into inflicting alot of pain and caringfor me.

sweetboundesire -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/20/2010 8:08:37 AM)
as a masochist, i would feel a bit sad[:(]

leadership527 -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/20/2010 8:27:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LPslittleclip have a discussion with Him and explain how you are feeling and how He is feeling and find out what works laughs This could be the answer to about 95% of the posts on collarme. perfect.

PrimalConsonance -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/20/2010 6:02:57 PM)
I don't know if this is the case with your situation, your master simply may not be very sadistic. But one of my big red flags when I was looking for a Dominant was even getting the inkling of a notion that the man was sadistic with women he did not know well and had no real attachment to, but after he began to care for them, he didn't want to "hurt" them anymore. This just screams to me "I don't like women in general and like to hurt them but when I care for one specifically I don't want to hurt her." No thank you. I've no desire to have the hatred of all woman kind taken out on me. Just give me an old fashioned sadist who, whether he loves them or not, likes to make girls go "Ow!!"

swtnsparkling -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/23/2010 2:54:58 PM)
Only been in the lifestyle six months? Just curious- was this the first meeting between you two or have you seen each other and played a number of times in the last six months?

bdsmnewbie10 -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/27/2010 7:31:09 AM)
If your asking me seen several times

Aynne88 -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (4/27/2010 10:23:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bdsmnewbie10 To clarify my level of pain, I thought he wanted me to want more, but guess not. I have discussed it now with Master and have found it's a combination apparently not into inflicting alot of pain and caringfor me. I would wager it's more of his not being a sadist because my Man loves me madly, and loves to make me scream too. Many masochists have very loving Masters, Owners, Doms, whatever you want to call them, that love them incredibly and have no problem at all being wickedly delicously painfully sadistic. Or not so delicious, depending on his mood. If you are already craving more pain etc., I have a feeling that this may not be the guy for you because generally as time goes on, those cravings of yours will intensify and you will be unsatisfied with a relationship where such a primal need is not being fed. I know I would be.

bdsmnewbie10 -> RE: AM I LUCKY, OR IS IT STRANGE (5/13/2010 8:40:52 AM)
swtnsparkling, we meet twice a month and this was on about the 11th meeting

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