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domiguy -> RE: Financially supporting your dom? Advice? (4/20/2010 10:40:27 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ownedbyPF
quote:
ORIGINAL: NervousGrrl
I have a structured annuity which is not funded by my father but was basically.. arranged by my father (long story) for the purpose of paying for me to go to college. It turns out I'm not the college type, but my partner and dom is, and my father wants the money to go to him to pay for his college. (lets call my dom Eric)
To the OP~
I think if you look at this portion underlined you might see that while the money may not have come from your father, he is the one who controlls it. You may have given it to him, but at that point it was his to control. He decided it should be used for college. He decided he wanted the money to go for Eric's school when you didn't want to go to school. Maybe you had to ask him, but still, you had to ask, you didn't just say... "Dad, this is what we are doing instead." It became a college fund... no longer yours to say... "nah I'm gonna buy a way cool car instead." It isn't your money anymore. Regardless of how you came about the money, it was turned into a college fund for your father to manage, not you. So, look at it from that perspective.... it isn't yours anymore, it's your Dad's and it's Eric's.
As to the college thing itself... I'm not a college kinda person either. Despite almost everyone in my family, including my Master, holding everything from a couple of BA's to a PHD. What can I say? I'm not cut out for it and at 39 that hasn't changed. That doesn't mean however that I'm not cut out for a structured life. In fact I need a huge amount of structure in my life. It's way too much of a leap to say that one has to do with another.
~s
Since you are not overly educated it would be wise to understand that which you are talking about.
Here is the dealio kids....You probably might want to leave this one to people that might have some knowledge in this area. Ya know some of that thar learnin shit.
An Annuity is a lump sum of money or a reward that has been converted for a series of future payments. The annuity in this case appears that it has been "structured" which would lead one to believe that the op is currently receiving these funds regardless of whether she goes to school or not.. Once the payments have been turned "on" the terms cannot be usually altered.
She repeatedly stated that it is "her" money and that is where she feels a bit of the sting....Her dad "wants" the money to be utilized to help pay for "eric's" education but the op has the final say.
I can understand her dad's sentiments in that by helping out Eric, his future job and income potential might benefit the op as well.
Here is the dealio NervousGrrl...You need to do some serious soul searching about what it is that makes you happy...Pursue this as an occupation. However, it should be noted that eating and fucking are not usually the skills that are in very high demand.
There are reputable trade schools, that skip some of the "fluff" of college and will deliver hands on experience from the culinary arts to working with Art, under the hood of a car.
Then again, the world always could use more waitresses, fast food workers and pro dommes.
Get your ass into something that might fulfill you financially, emotionally as well as give you the sense of pride that you are not forced to be dependent but choose to be dependent and acquiesce to the needs of another.
Now that is some mothah fuckin' groovy shit.....Hollah!
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