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lally2 -> RE: gone to ground (5/2/2010 6:20:48 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rto75
Hey all, would like to get your 2 cents here. I had recently met a great girl on CM. Our interests lined up pretty much perfect and I was very close to giving her a collar, something she also wanted. Would have been a mix of vanilla and bdsm.
One night after quite literally thanking me for her rules and obedience training, telling me how lucky and happy she was, she just dropped off. Days go by with no contact. With all that we shared I have a very hard time believing she was faking everything. I suppose it is worth mentioning that this sort of happened very close to the night I planned to meet up and verbally agree to the collar. She was forced to reschedule due to work.
She had very little experience coming into all this, but took to it instantly and eagerly. Is it common for a new and inexperienced sub/slave to get a little freaked out and take a step back? I have left a message outlining my disappointment and letting her know that after an appropriate punishment she still has a place with me, but I'm not interested in pushing her any harder if she got spooked... or chasing her for that matter (compatibility notwithstanding).
I have met a lot of flaky women, but never anyone that has done so this far in. Anyone have some insight from your own experiences? I can tell you that I did check up on her just a little and she isn't hurt or otherwise unable to re-establish with me.
you mention her inexperience but you mention collaring before even ever meeting. new as she might be to all of this, im sure she's read enough to know that collaring is something for much further down the track (usually). it is for many like a wedding ring, it denotes committment to a committed relationship.
collaring isnt usually something you discuss before youve even met. - personally that would fly up a red flag to me, it would suggest a few things...,
1. that you havent met too many from the internet or youd know that real life chemistry doesnt always hit the mark
2. that youre way too eager before ever really getting to know me
3. that youre using collaring as some sort of psycho anchor rather than allowing the gradual process of Ds to that job for you
4. that you are possibly less experienced than youve said you were
if all of that is true then she has probably been spooked off. new or not she would have certainly read around the whole topic. but - that maybe doesnt explain why she'd dropped off the planet for you.
it maybe something has come up in her life that has taken her away.
it maybe that she's got spooked by the reality suddenly looming up, her inexperience, talk of collaring, big committment rather than slow gradual fun
it maybe that she isnt what she says she is.
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