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LadyAngelika -> RE: Submissive cues in the real world? (5/10/2010 5:01:57 AM)
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First, welcome to the forums :-)
quote:
ORIGINAL: naturallysub
As a Domme out in the "real world", are there cues that You pick up on that suggest to You that a male is a potential submissive? And if so, do You then choose to test Your theory and give him a subtle test to see how he responds?
And if You are willing to share and go further, what might those cues be that You are picking up on?
I meet submissive men all the time. I tend to get turned off when they act too submissive right away, like there is no challenge at all. For the record, I see a great deal of submissive men in vanilla marriages, what many people refer to as pussy whipped men.
Perhaps I should clarify my answer with the following: I'm not really interested in "submissive men" but rather men who are somewhat socially dominant with strong characters who are unlikely to submit to 99.9% of the people they meet but are willing to submit to a woman they will be taken with, in this case, me. Now pegging one of them (pun intended) is a little trickier, because one has to be adept at teasing apart what are the sweet things that he might be doing to try and seduce me and the sweet things he might be doing because he wants to submit to me.
I'd have to tell you that it happens through conversation and each conversation is different as each man and situation is different. I'll make subtle hints and see what their reaction is. Because I'm rather bubbly in person (I might not come across like that on the boards) I can get away with little jokes such as saying "Good boy" with a wink. His reaction to this is very important: he can say "I'm not a boy sweetheart, I'm a man" and his body stiffens somewhat to indicate I've hit a nerve; or he can just not react which means I'll have to try another approach; or he can totally give himself away at that moment. This has happened to me a few times and I have to say, the huntress in me gets a kick out of that very moment.
The key, no matter what I do is, being subtle, which is absolutely fine by me as I like the little play that comes out of that kind of seduction game.
quote:
Might as well put this next question out there... lol. If a submissive male suspects that a woman he has come across is Dominant, how might he best convey his submissiveness to Her in a way that She is likely
to respond favourably?
I can't speak for all women, but for me, he should not be too eager nor should he demonstrate any of this publicly. Nothing is more embarrassing to me then a man showing public displays of subservience if he barely knows me: it akin to a strange dog coming up to me and humping my leg. Again, subtlety is key. Men wanting to attract Dominant women should remember that a great deal of us who want intimate/romantic relationships with the men have a D/s dynamic with want to be seduced by them.
If I think back to some of the things that men have said to me to let me know they were interested in my dominant nature, it has been things like "you are a very strong, take charge woman and I really like this" or one that was a little less subtle, but was timed just right was "I'm sure you command the attention of most men you meet" and it came with a look.
The looks are so important. You do realise that most of our communication is done through the non-verbal, through body language. That is where you'll find most of your cues.
I hope this was helpful!
- LA
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