Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher?

Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (Full Version)

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lobodomslavery -> Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 9:42:29 AM)
Morning Ladies. Just want your thoughts on this please. Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? Is judicial caning a punishment too far? Or do some masochists really love this kevin

leadership527 -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 9:46:34 AM)
Carol just likes to please me. She'd be thrilled if she could do that with zero effort on her part. Ideally, she'd probably love it if I wasn't grooving on the whole total obedience thing so much. She certainly has no desire to be punished.

hejira92 -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 9:57:23 AM)
Sometimes I wish He were more lenient, but I know that it's best for me in the long run for Him to be harsh. I mean, if He actually listened to my begging and back-tracking, I would probably respect Him less than I do now for being un-manipulatable (if that's a word, you know what I mean). The cane is only used as punishment for me because it is so horrible for me (I am not very masochistic). Most of the time, just knowing I've disappointed Him in any way is the worst punishment because I can keep punishing myself long after He is done with the cane. He actually has had to make a rule - once a punishment is done- it's DONE. No more going over the offense or dwelling on it.

Daddysredhead -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 10:03:18 AM)
Yanno, I'm gonna answer this with all seriousness. (which is a stretch for me as I am the class clown) As a switch in a Dominant role, I have had the occasional person say that they could take more than what I gave at that moment. So, to answer your question, yes, I have had someone ask me to be more harsh. As a switch in a submissive role, I have had times where I have begged for a caning or a really intense scene. I have gotten them. I think sometimes people just need what they need, and if lucky, they get what they ask for. ~ Red

Daddysredhead -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 10:05:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hejira92 Most of the time, just knowing I've disappointed Him in any way is the worst punishment because I can keep punishing myself long after He is done with the cane. He actually has had to make a rule - once a punishment is done- it's DONE. No more going over the offense or dwelling on it. DB has the same rule. hugs to my beautiful hejira, and please give one to Cuffkinks for me [:)]

LadyPact -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 10:09:42 AM)
Considering that My sub isn't lenient or harsh with Me (since I'm the one doing the topping and making the decisions) the question makes no sense.

LadyAngelika -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 10:16:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact Considering that My sub isn't lenient or harsh with Me (since I'm the one doing the topping and making the decisions) the question makes no sense. Kevin wrote: "Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher". I think he's asking if your sub would like you to be more lenient or harsh with him. Can I offer you a little more coffee, LP :-) Edited to add: To the OP, I think that when you are a good match with someone, this isn't an issue. I have always been aware of my submissive partner's needs and I will adjust myself to these needs, but in the end, I am the one making the decision on the degree of harshness. And though I love caning a boy, for me, judicial caning is way too harsh. It causes permanent damage and scaring, something I'm not into. I like a boy with a cute looking bottom, not one all scared ;-) - LA

LadyPact -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 10:38:15 AM)
I appreciate the offer, LadyA. More caffeine is certainly in order this morning. Very late night and all. I'm sure you understand. [;)] I apologize for misreading the original. If we're talking about play, I'm sure there have been times that it has gone back and forth, especially in the first getting to know of a play partner. When I'm still getting used to a person, how much pain they can take and so forth, I may go a bit on the easier side, just to be sure. As time goes by and I'm more familiar with them, I know how far I can take them, where I can push them a little more, etc. In the established dynamic, at just about three years in, I know clip pretty well. Sure, there have been times that I've been harsh on him, but he knows what it means to be wearing My collar and all that entails. I'm sure he would tell you that, the few times I've punished him, he wished at the time that I would have been easier. However, it's also the very reason that I never have to punish him for the same thing twice. I am rather rigid, but clip thrives in well structured situations. I tend to think we are very compatible in this area.

Scheherazade -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 11:05:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact Considering that My sub isn't lenient or harsh with Me (since I'm the one doing the topping and making the decisions) the question makes no sense. Yes, your comment makes no sense of this post ? The question is: does your sub want *you* to be more lenient or harsh. BTW, my daddy is just about perfect.

LadyEllen -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 11:14:30 AM)
Whatever has come over you Kevin? This question is dangerously close to being reasonable (for here anyway), well expressed and on topic.... good for you. So I will answer it in the spirit in which it was apparently put. Despite me being a sadist and very much into humiliation too, I also have good self control such that I dont take it further than I think is enough, and it is always my decision as to what is enough. This can vary from person to person but as far as the thrashing side goes my ground rules are that I dont intend to draw running blood (deep red welts on the verge of breaking are OK) and wont go that far - I regard it as a failure if I do. Nevertheless, the capacity and desire for substantial levels of pain from some guys I have indulged myself with has been such that they beg for more even when I feel the limit has been achieved. But it remains my decision that the thrashing is over, simple as that. And yes, I have given what you might imagine to be a judicial caning as seen on TV from Malaysia. No warm up as he wanted it straight, what with being the most slutty of pain sluts I have ever come across. For the sake of not wishing to provide wank fodder, lets just say it was completed but that he has never again since asked for the same, even though the end result was not exactly alike to that suffered in the real thing. E

littlewonder -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 11:19:54 AM)
He's perfect just the way he is. I wouldn't be with him otherwise.

LadyPact -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 11:33:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Scheherazade Yes, your comment makes no sense of this post ? The question is: does your sub want *you* to be more lenient or harsh. BTW, my daddy is just about perfect. Had you read the following remarks, you would see that I corrected that and apologized for misreading the original.

StrongSpirit -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 11:42:37 AM)
Subs want their Doms to be more realistic or more dramatic. Masochists on the other hand want their Sadists to be more in tune with what the sub's body is ready for / can handle (lenient/harsh).

DesFIP -> RE: Would your sub like you to be more lenient or harsher? (5/22/2010 12:14:25 PM)
It isn't up to me to decide when he needs to be harsh or lenient. If it were, then I would be the one in charge. By the time I'm in such shape that I just want to be beaten until I cry, he always thinks I'm past the point that would be helpful. Instead I get put to bed with a couple of Advil and my back rubbed till I'm calm. It's his decision, not mine. However if overall I wanted a lot more pain than he is comfortable handing out, then we would be incompatible in this area and need to decide how best to solve this problem. Which could be by playing with others or by finding someone more compatible. But just as you have the right to seek someone harsher than her, she has the right to seek someone who is more in tune with her. Both of you deserve to be happy, but not necessarily with each other.

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