RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (Full Version)

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lally2 -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 12:59:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Well so am i glad its not an issue in my life. Im just intrigued by the bizarre thats all
kevin



i dont see it as bizarre at all.  but then i dont tend to leap to any extreme ideas regarding what  goes on between the average Ms or Ds couple.  i would say that most Ds and Ms relationships are firmly based in reality - youre going to get people who take things too far but in the end its personal choice isnt it. 

so long as you drink water you can go without actual solid food for quite a while - if theyre given food supplemental drinks they can go on indefinitely for years - i know a lady who hasnt eaten solid foods for nearly 30 years and she's a good weight and perfectly fine in that regard.





porcelaine -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 1:59:09 PM)

leadership527,

quote:

Why on earth would you think I know that? You talk to ME for crying out loud *laughs*


I have a penchant for the peculiar or so I'm told. *pokes*

quote:

For instance, I totally get that some people liked getting put in cages. No issue there, no questions. But when the statement is, "locked in a cage 24/7" that is life, not fantasy. By definition, it is ALL of life.


I follow you. For the most part I agree. I doubt he really means 24/7. The guy harboring that idea usually doesn't advertise it. Notice I said idea not a fantasy. Whether it's something he can put in play is another question. There's the feasibility factor that we're both aware of.

In terms of this thread we're talking about specific personality types in relation to the op's question. We agree a meal or two won't kill you. Starvation is a different thing and we never factored in the time frame. I can only see three types enjoying it:

Someone that's fully surrendered her body without question
A person with a distorted body image (real or imagined)
Closet anorexic (assuming he's not pro-ana)

I don't assume any desire long term harm. Just an omission of food for a predetermined period. We have feeder fetishes. This one isn't that hard to envision in all honesty.

~porcelaine




leadership527 -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 2:13:03 PM)

Well, as I said, I long ago came to conclude that ANYTHING can be eroticized. I think that the word "starving" sent me off on the different path. Also, I shouldn't really have responded at all since the whole "punishment" thing is outside my ken.




HeathenMa1am -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 2:26:14 PM)

Personally I don't do punishments. If my sub doesn't want to do what I tell them, I let them go and find another one. I want a sub who WANTS to serve. I don't like "bratting" and would never encourage it.




porcelaine -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 4:25:44 PM)

leadership527,

quote:

Also, I shouldn't really have responded at all since the whole "punishment" thing is outside my ken.


That stance would have had me begging for adoption years ago. :)

~porcelaine




leadership527 -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 4:40:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
That stance would have had me begging for adoption years ago. :)
Well damn, I'm only a few years late. :(

Honestly, I don't have the patience for the whole punishment thing. The way I figure it, if I'm going to give a command, then she disobeys, then I punish her, then she obeys, why not just cut to the chase and get right to the "she obeys" part... sans any nastiness? If I were more true and real, I'd TAKE my girl. But seeing as I'm not, I kind of just expect her to give herself to me. This is what comes of submitting to a lazy master. Carol manages to put up with it though *chuckles*

Actually, the more I read and interact with long-term couples, what I've come to understand is that punishment (as distinguished from funishment), is seldom a significant part of the dynamic (significant oft-times equating to "it never happens.. the last time was... uh... I can't remember...a long time ago.")




kiwisub12 -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 5:19:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527


Actually, the more I read and interact with long-term couples, what I've come to understand is that punishment (as distinguished from funishment), is seldom a significant part of the dynamic (significant oft-times equating to "it never happens.. the last time was... uh... I can't remember...a long time ago.")



I agree with this- I've been with my Sir for five years, and he has punished me ..... drum roll.... once! and I don't remember for what.
If a couple is happy and together then punishment really is a mote point - usually consisting of "I'm disappointed in you" or variations on that theme.

This thread would seem to be a fantasy or a role play thing.

edited and re-edited for spelling




lovingpet -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 5:41:00 PM)

I'm with the both of you.  In two years, there has been exactly one instance of punishment and it was not even remotely like some of this stuff we read on the boards here.  I was terrified of it just because I know how deeply sadistic my partner is, but in the end, it wasn't the actual punishment that hurt.  It was his disappointment and deep concern which was written all over his every expression and movement.  He was worried about me and how I was treating myself.  That was a wake up call and one he need not ever repeat.  A simple look or saying my name is really all it takes for most things and I will correct myself or skip the previously considered disobedience.  I guess extreme disobedience could call for extreme measures, but by and large, from both sides of the equation, I think I'd just as soon end a relationship in which there was such a lack of respect one for the other.  It simply wouldn't be worth it.

lovingpet 




Wolf2Bear -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 6:36:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

This came from another thread. Ladies im wondering about your views on this one. A new poster remarked that some in the lifestyle go for more extreme practices like starving a slave or sub or denying a slave or sub food or have a slave beg for food. One or two remarked that this was bonkers, the general consenus though was that one Woman's fish is another one's poison, what is acceptable to one Mistress may not be acceptable to another. Do you think starving a slave is acceptable if done within certain time periods and no more? Are people like this certfiable? Or is it ok if its between consenting adults?
kevin



In the context of using food as a motivator for training - no I will not go down this route.

If a sub asked for help to alter his eating habits for the sake of a healthier way of eating and for health reasons, yes I would assit yet would not deny food. There are better ways to motivate a sub to change inappropriate behavior and denying another person food I feel is not a wise choice on my part.




PeonForHer -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 7:04:03 PM)

FR

This thread is in danger of falling prey to Peon's Law. This is CollarMe's own equivalent of Godwin's Law (That law which states as an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches.)

Peon's Law states that as a CM discussion about a particular kink progresses, the risks and dangers of that kink are emphasised to the point where everyone eventually agrees that death is the likely result of partaking in it. Therefore, no-one should partake in that kink.

This consensus will bring the thread to a close.

[;)]




porcelaine -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/23/2010 8:05:35 PM)

leadership527,

quote:

Well damn, I'm only a few years late. :(


Maybe we can work out a lease agreement. *laughs*

quote:

Honestly, I don't have the patience for the whole punishment thing.


Punishment was very difficult for me in the past. I'd often punish myself as well and it was a real ugly scene. I think it's become the go to for some unfortunately.

quote:

why not just cut to the chase and get right to the "she obeys" part... sans any nastiness?


You couldn't be Mr. Uber Domly Sir. *grins*

quote:

If I were more true and real, I'd TAKE my girl. But seeing as I'm not, I kind of just expect her to give herself to me. This is what comes of submitting to a lazy master. Carol manages to put up with it though *chuckles*


I don't believe a lot of the tales spun. It's the stuff that legends are made of.

quote:

Actually, the more I read and interact with long-term couples, what I've come to understand is that punishment (as distinguished from funishment), is seldom a significant part of the dynamic (significant oft-times equating to "it never happens.. the last time was... uh... I can't remember...a long time ago.")


In the four years I spent with my Lady she never did it. Ever. Corrective measures are meant to instill accountability and change. That happened. I didn't need the theatrics.

But then again I was very well behaved with her. She compelled my obedience. I saw little reason to act differently.

~porcelaine




DesFIP -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 5:04:45 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527
Actually, the more I read and interact with long-term couples, what I've come to understand is that punishment (as distinguished from funishment), is seldom a significant part of the dynamic (significant oft-times equating to "it never happens.. the last time was... uh... I can't remember...a long time ago.")


Once, a couple of months in, 8 years ago. And it was proforma, 4 light spanks, to help me release some guilt. In the time since then we've learned that every damned instance where he could have punished was actually caused by miscommunication. Should you punish someone when you were unclear?

Re the starvation thing, he could but he'd be starving too. I do the cooking.




IronBear -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 5:13:16 AM)

Would I starve or deny a slave food for punishment? Aye I would in the same way as I's send a child to bed without supper if their behaviour was inappropriate. I'll add to this in that for punishment I would restrict a slave's diet to the foods necessary to sustain life and well being without the added treats or savoury dishes. In the training phase I expect a slave to beg for his or her food just as they are expected to beg to be permitted to wear clothing. Such things, I have found are excellent in the early training period to help reinforce the slave's position in the relationship and home by ensuring that it is implanted in their psyche that whilst they wear my or my home's collar, such things are earned and not a right. 




porcelaine -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 7:43:50 AM)

DesFIP,

quote:

In the time since then we've learned that every damned instance where he could have punished was actually caused by miscommunication.


Miscommunication is often a factor or she had something more compelling than his directive that she chose to follow.

quote:

Should you punish someone when you were unclear?


A leader wouldn't. Napoleon types are apt to do so.

~porcelaine




daddysprop247 -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 9:36:51 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
That stance would have had me begging for adoption years ago. :)
Well damn, I'm only a few years late. :(

Honestly, I don't have the patience for the whole punishment thing. The way I figure it, if I'm going to give a command, then she disobeys, then I punish her, then she obeys, why not just cut to the chase and get right to the "she obeys" part... sans any nastiness? If I were more true and real, I'd TAKE my girl. But seeing as I'm not, I kind of just expect her to give herself to me. This is what comes of submitting to a lazy master. Carol manages to put up with it though *chuckles*

Actually, the more I read and interact with long-term couples, what I've come to understand is that punishment (as distinguished from funishment), is seldom a significant part of the dynamic (significant oft-times equating to "it never happens.. the last time was... uh... I can't remember...a long time ago.")


i agree that punishment is usually a rare (and always very sad for both parties) occurrence in serious, committed long-term D/s relationships. although i cannot say that i do not remember the last time i was punished (it was last april btw)...with every year that goes by punishments are needed less and less. but despite my hopes otherwise, i cannot envision a day when they are wholly a thing of the past, as i will never be perfect. there will always be mistakes, or those times when i fail to reach the bar, and in this household those human errors will always merit punishment.

willful disobedience is something else altogether, and an offense i have committed only once in 10 years.

the OP doesn't read to my eyes like anything remotely this serious or real, however. it sounds more like some kind of kink/game, with some erotic undercurrent. and if that is one's kink, well go for it i guess?

but there are some legitimate reasons why an Owner may decide to deny their property food...this is something my own Master has done (not with me). for him it is a useful disciplinary tool, a way to remind one who needs the wake-up call just who is in control and how deep that control runs. this is very different from a punishment.




NuevaVida -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 9:42:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

I think that the word "starving" sent me off on the different path.


I think the word was misused, as the OP went on to say "for a few hours" or a skipped meal or two.  That's not "starving", that's just feeling hungry for awhile.

Yes, I've been sent to bed without dinner, when I screwed up my schedule and failed to go to the gym as required.  It wasn't "punishment", it was just a consequence of not being mindful of my schedule and not doing what I promised.  By the time I got home from work and errands, it was well after 8PM and he decided I could have a couple of bites of a snack but that was it.  I didn't "starve".  I drank a bunch of water, had a few Triscuits, and went to bed by 10.

But he wouldn't do that if it would put me at risk (mental/physical health).

At the MAST meeting I've attended a few times, I don't think anyone would have found being sent to bed without dinner a big deal.  I do think you got stuck on the word "starve".




leadership527 -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 10:04:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247
with every year that goes by punishments are needed less and less. but despite my hopes otherwise, i cannot envision a day when they are wholly a thing of the past, as i will never be perfect.

And that statement there, I suspect, sums up why we don't need it in our relationship. Carol is no more perfect than the next person. But there are a lot of commands that just plain aren't that important to me. Sure, I want them obeyed, but issuing a reminder or two just doesn't seem like that big of a deal. If I ask Carol to get me a glass of water and she loses track of that todo, I honestly don't care. I just ask again. Other people, obviously, feel different about this. But I've always been way more of a big picture guy than a detail oriented one.

quote:

willful disobedience is something else altogether, and an offense i have committed only once in 10 years.

Coupled with this statement. Willful disobedience is, in fact, a whole different kettle of fish and I have no interest in playing that game... at all. Conveniently, neither does Carol so that all works out well too. Honestly, if Carol didn't actually and deeply desire following my lead, then I wouldn't think of her as a slave and our marriage wouldn't be structured this way to start with. I'd structure it in some other way that was more suited to our personalities. In fact, it is beyond rare that Carol even forgets any command that I have placed any stress on. As I noted, a lot of commands are trivial in my mind and she knows that. The ones which are not I try to communicate clearly on and they don't got misplaced, or forgotten. I cannot really imagine her remembering a command yet choosing to blow it off. That's just not how her head works.

quote:

but there are some legitimate reasons why an Owner may decide to deny their property food...this is something my own Master has done (not with me). for him it is a useful disciplinary tool, a way to remind one who needs the wake-up call just who is in control and how deep that control runs. this is very different from a punishment.
No disagreement there. I'm currently "withholding food" from Carol because.. you know... I want her slimmer. My literal engineer's brain got sidetracked on the word "starve" because that word goes well beyond "withholding food". When I think of "starve" I'm thinking "starve". i would not consider placing her on a diet or sending her to bed without supper or any number of smaller actions as "starving" her. I got so hung up on that word that I missed the second part.. "or deny them food".

EDITED to add:
In a nod to Peon... When I'm in doubt, I simply ask myself, "What would Hitler do?"




ResidentSadist -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 10:17:45 AM)

You really don't need my remarks about how a couple days fasting never hurt anyone . . . now here come the SSC flag wavers saying, what about hypoglycemia. diabetics, etc etc ... kiss my safe, sane and consensual ass. In fact, ask the target of your punishment if they believe in SSC, if they say yes, starve the little fucker until they pass out! When they wake up, make them suck cock, drink piss and eat shit for what little mutrition they will get out of it. Then take a pic of their cum splattered, shit stained face as they gargle your piss . . . now they can become the new poster subbie for the SSC flyers.




LadyPact -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 10:19:21 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
That stance would have had me begging for adoption years ago. :)
Well damn, I'm only a few years late. :(

Honestly, I don't have the patience for the whole punishment thing. The way I figure it, if I'm going to give a command, then she disobeys, then I punish her, then she obeys, why not just cut to the chase and get right to the "she obeys" part... sans any nastiness? If I were more true and real, I'd TAKE my girl. But seeing as I'm not, I kind of just expect her to give herself to me. This is what comes of submitting to a lazy master. Carol manages to put up with it though *chuckles*

Actually, the more I read and interact with long-term couples, what I've come to understand is that punishment (as distinguished from funishment), is seldom a significant part of the dynamic (significant oft-times equating to "it never happens.. the last time was... uh... I can't remember...a long time ago.")

This is actually a more interesting point.

Even though it has been quite some time ago that I last punished clip, I still consider this a dynamic that includes punishment.  The fact that I have punished him specifically makes it so.  Even if I wouldn't have already done so, the premise that I would potentially involve punishment should I find it necessary or warranted being absolutely one of the methods I might use in this dynamic makes it one.




kiwisub12 -> RE: Would you starve a slave or deny them food for a period as punishment? (5/24/2010 10:23:31 AM)

Damn - must have been a rough night at Resident Sadists' house last night.




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