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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 3:05:14 AM

reynardfox

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LittleBroken

I'd be in a relationship with a Cross dresser in a heartbeat but then I have a very liberal attitude.
I'm attracted to whom I'm attracted to and I don't see gender as a limiting factor.

Damn right!

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Post #: 21

RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 3:06:01 AM

sweetsub1957

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~Fast Reply~
Well, i'm not sure why SocratesNot was talking about who he despises and thinks are idiots, but the reason i'm not into cross dressers isn't that i'm not into women. i am into women as well as men, but real women. i can appreciate that sometimes cross dressers can be very attractive as women, evenlook like a woman i'd be interested in, but if i know they're really not a woman i'd still not be interested, and if i found out "later" at a more close-to-intimate point i'd feel lied to and not interested.

~sweetsub~

edited for punctuation

< Message edited by sweetsub1957 -- 6/6/2010 3:08:12 AM >

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In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 3:13:43 AM

LittleBroken

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quote:

ORIGINAL: reynardfox

quote:

ORIGINAL: LittleBroken

I'd be in a relationship with a Cross dresser in a heartbeat but then I have a very liberal attitude.
I'm attracted to whom I'm attracted to and I don't see gender as a limiting factor.

Damn right!

Thank you Reynardfox.

(in reply to reynardfox)

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Post #: 23

RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 6:01:49 AM

IronBear

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No problems Lass, you have mail on 'tother side.

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 6:08:40 AM

crazyml

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LittleBroken

Someone go check the thermostat in Hell because I really enjoyed reading this post from S.Not.

Well done, Sweetheart.

Same here.

Cripes SNot... that's the second rocking post in 24 hours!

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 6:22:15 AM

LittleBroken

Posts: 207
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quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

No problems Lass, you have mail on 'tother side.

Thank you Lovely..a reciprocal pm is awaiting you.

Regards,
~LB

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 6:44:29 AM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DommeKeliDallas

I am interested in knowing how REAL women feel about Domming crossdressers and having personal relationships with them.

I must not be a Real woman because I don't dom anyone.
If I was dominant, I wouldn't have any interest at all in crossdressers. They are a turn off for me.

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 8:05:53 AM

DommeKeliDallas

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I sincerely appreciate everyone's voices.
Thanks so MUCH!

A BIG KISS FROM BIG D!

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 8:10:19 AM

DommeKeliDallas

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

quote:

ORIGINAL: DommeKeliDallas

I am interested in knowing how REAL women feel about Domming crossdressers and having personal relationships with them.

I must not be a Real woman because I don't dom anyone.
If I was dominant, I wouldn't have any interest at all in crossdressers. They are a turn off for me.
[/quote
By "real women", I meant BORN FEMALE...GENETIC WOMAN.
Some MEN I have met think that when they put a dress on, they ARE "female."]

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 8:20:33 AM

ourmsbetty

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

It's a fascinating topic how females are still not comfortable giving the power to wear womens clothing to men.

It's not a matter of power or not. It's a matter of who I am attracted to or not.

I happen to be attracted to men, submissive men, but men who are still clearly masculine. I have had fun helping friends dress. I had no problem giving them the "power" to wear womens' clothing I just didn't get turned on by it.

Maybe it's a hang up, maybe it's just who I am. I don't see that it much matters as there are plenty of other Dommes who do indeed enjoy it.

Ms. Betty

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

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Post #: 30

RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 8:36:15 AM

sweetsub1957

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oops.

< Message edited by sweetsub1957 -- 6/6/2010 8:38:42 AM >

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In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

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Post #: 31

RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 9:00:32 AM

LadyNTrainer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer
Most vanillas aren't comfortable with gender transgressive acts; that's why they're vanillas.

As if kinky peeps are any better, because they are not.

I don't know about better or worse in an abstract sense, but I do know that I can bring a not-yet-passing transgendered buddy to a kink event and get a friendly welcome. But when we go to the shopping mall or a restaurant or other vanilla venue, I've had to exchange sharp looks, words, and occasionally threats of violence with random passersby whose business my friend's gender is not.

So yeah, kinky peeps are better in the sense that I've never had to tell anyone that I'd cut their liver out and eat it if they decided they wanted to get physical about harassing my girlfriend. I've had to do that a few times in vanilla venues, and it's not really my first choice of entertainment.

< Message edited by LadyNTrainer -- 6/6/2010 9:02:00 AM >

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 9:03:15 AM

cloudboy

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Sometimes its a matter of finding work.

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 9:18:58 AM

LadyAngelika

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quote:

By "real women", I meant BORN FEMALE...GENETIC WOMAN.
Some MEN I have met think that when they put a dress on, they ARE "female."

And what's wrong with that? I always figure that you are what you identify with. The transgendered people I know often use the terminology G-girls (genetic girls) and T-girls (transgendered girls), which is just fine with me.

If they feel like a woman, it is no threat to you being a woman. I don't need to own the patent on being real.

- LA

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 9:29:04 AM

LadyAngelika

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ourmsbetty

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

It's a fascinating topic how females are still not comfortable giving the power to wear womens clothing to men.

It's not a matter of power or not. It's a matter of who I am attracted to or not.

I happen to be attracted to men, submissive men, but men who are still clearly masculine. I have had fun helping friends dress. I had no problem giving them the "power" to wear womens' clothing I just didn't get turned on by it.

Maybe it's a hang up, maybe it's just who I am. I don't see that it much matters as there are plenty of other Dommes who do indeed enjoy it.

Ms. Betty

That is an important point you bring up Betty. I, like you, am not drawn to crossdressers. That said, I've played little games in the past with partners and I may do it again if the mood strikes me.

The unfortunate thing is that often, when I state that they aren't my main attraction, the backlash is unwarranted. I get accused of being close minded. And much like you Betty, I have a long history of close acquaintances and friends who have been transgendered and they've always had my full support.

- LA

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 9:36:48 AM

LadyNTrainer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DommeKeliDallas
By "real women", I meant BORN FEMALE...GENETIC WOMAN.
Some MEN I have met think that when they put a dress on, they ARE "female."]

And what makes a woman, or a man? It's more than just outward physiology. Recent studies have shown that there are two distinct hormonal cascades in fetal development that influence the neural architecture versus outward physical development. If something gets interrupted in between, it is very possible to have the brain of one gender and the body of another. That's basically what being transgender is, in a somewhat overly simplified nutshell.

It's not a choice. It's not a lifestyle. It's neurobiology. I'm talking about actual transgendered people here, not folks who cross dress exclusively for erotic pleasure but do not self-identify as the opposite gender outside of scene space.

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 9:37:44 AM

Andalusite

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I think the "real women" bit is a mean to MTF transgendered people, and unnecessary. Just saying women, or even genetic women, would be preferable. On to your question, I once playfully crossdressed a vanilla boyfriend, before I discovered that I could include BDSM or D/s in my relationships. Since then, I dated a switch for a year and a half, and a submissive for 2 or 3 months, and both were crossdressers before we met. They did occasionally cross-dress during play or other things. For me, I can still get turned on by someone who is crossdressed, but they'd still have to put in at least as much effort as if they were wearing masculine clothes, or naked. Cross-dressing doesn't actively arouse me, but it doesn't prevent me from getting turned on. Usually, it gives more of a slumber party/helping a female friend get ready for a bit event kind of vibe. I feel thrilled when I can help them pick out just the right outfit, or the perfect shoes, or if a makeup tip makes a big difference for them. If they needed it the majority of the time, we probably wouldn't have been compatible.

I've also helped out a few drag queens - loaning clothes, working with them on hair, makeup, walking, dancing, and stuff. Since they were gay, we obviously weren't going to be sexually intimate or romantically involved, although I have done some S/M and bondage with one of them. I feel that the ones who want to be degraded are misogynist and sexist, and that makes me uncomfortable. One guy wrote that he expected me to orgasm just from watching him parade around in panties, because he would be humiliated. I suspect that he's never been with a woman before, since he was so clueless and unrealistic. Here in the Bay Area, someone who is cross-dressed doesn't tend to draw a lot of negative attention anywhere. If I were dating someone who wanted to be crossdressed in public, we'd probably start with kink events and/or the Castro district.

< Message edited by Andalusite -- 6/6/2010 9:58:10 AM >

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 9:38:49 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Betty no I'm not talking about personal attraction at all- that's completely valid and should be encouraged to know what turns you on and what doesn't and not compromise on that.

I was talking in a more global sense that men are still not free to wear skirts or hosiery or make up without extra negative comment or outcasting by society.

Not that women don't have their own issues, as someone who rarely shaves her body hair I've dealt with the "weird borderline gross" reaction in and out of the kink scene myself.

LNT- it really depends on the degree and places you go. There are still plenty of kink spaces where sub males do not feel comfortable because they get a serious "males are supposed to be in charge and females are supposed to be in the kitchen and serving so you're not really a male" vibe including from the other SUBS.

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RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 10:02:30 AM

IronBear

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I am having difficulty LA with your reference to:

quote:

I was talking in a more global sense that men are still not free to wear skirts or hosiery

Formal dress for at least some of the Greek guards sees them wearing a short dress and hosiery. Of course you'll never see a Scotsman traditionally attired, wearing a dress like piece of apparel.

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Post #: 39

RE: Crossdressers and REAL women and LTR. - 6/6/2010 10:12:57 AM

LadyNTrainer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
Not that women don't have their own issues, as someone who rarely shaves her body hair I've dealt with the "weird borderline gross" reaction in and out of the kink scene myself.

When I didn't, I never had an issue with it in the kink community. I'm sure some individuals might have found me less attractive, but that would have been their problem. I find it makes a good asshole filter.

quote:

LNT- it really depends on the degree and places you go. There are still plenty of kink spaces where sub males do not feel comfortable because they get a serious "males are supposed to be in charge and females are supposed to be in the kitchen and serving so you're not really a male" vibe including from the other SUBS.

Too true. I've run into some supposedly pansexual groups that were so heavily male dominant, male-sub-phobic and homophobic that they made me feel extremely uncomfortable. I have no problem at all with people whose orientation is different from mine, but when they have a problem with me and they make that clear with "joking" or not so joking remarks, that's not cool at all. You'd think that anyone in the BDSM community would have learned to be ashamed of bigotry and intolerance, but apparently some folks never got that particular memo.

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