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ElanSubdued -> RE: Didn't think finding a woman to fuck me with a strapon would be so hard (6/6/2010 9:41:40 AM)
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tylerb,
quote:
im looking for a woman lol not just the kink there is more to it than that i want to serve and please the woman that eventually fucks me.
I haven't looked at your profile, however, the above isn't likely to attract many women. Vulgar language. Sloppy writing and poor grammar. Desperation. That's what comes across and it isn't any more attractive in the BDSM world than in the vanilla one. The words "kinky" and "domme" do not make a woman any less selective than other women who don't necessarily identify in BDSM. You're still speaking with a human being of the female persuasion and all the same rules apply. Presenting yourself with courtesy, intelligence, grace, empathy, a sense of balance and humour... I've yet to meet any woman (or human being, for that matter) for whom these aren't the entry points for conversation. Throw away any notion that simply because a woman is kinky you can now say things like "I'd like you to fuck me with your strap-on" as an opening. How well does this kind of line work if you walk up to a random woman on the street and say this? You'd get yourself slapped and possibly reported to a police officer. It's no different here, except the police officer is more likely a forum moderator. I suggest you drop the vulgar language and BDSM focus, and join in the conversations here in a graceful, intelligent way. Much more than your profile, this is a great way to make an impression (although, if your profile is kink/fuck focused, I'd clean that up too).
--- Her pleasure is more important to me than my own.
I'm guessing the dominant women on here will read through this in a millisecond and call B.S. on it. I'd be surprised if you don't enjoy being pleasured and I'd also be surprised if you're looking for a partner and don't wish to derive any pleasure from sharing with her. Unfortunately, on the Internet, lot of posts and, for that matter, profiles from dominant women, perpetuate the one-sided myth... "it's all about her pleasure" and on and on. How many vanilla relationships last if one of the partner's isn't getting their needs met? Not too many, in my experience.
Do you see a theme here? Until otherwise negotiated with a kinky person with whom you have rapport, all rules of the vanilla world apply and, even then, most rules of the vanilla world still apply. If a dominant is consistently rude and abrupt with their partner, do you think the partner is going to stick around? Not bloody likely mate! :-)
I hope something I've written here is helpful in your next approach on this forum. Welcome aboard and good luck,
Elan.
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