Burning Calories

Burning Calories (Full Version)

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sub4hire -> Burning Calories (9/17/2004 9:40:40 PM)
After much and extensive research Scientists are pleased to give you the approximate Calorie counts involved in enjoying the worlds most enjoyable form of exercise. REMOVING HER CLOTHES: With her consent.....................................12 Calories Without her consent................................2187 Calories OPENING HER BRA: With both hands.......................................8 Calories With one hand.........................................12 Calories With your teeth.....................................485 Calories Without her consent, in the back seat.......48,288 Calories PUTTING ON A CONDOM: With an erection......................................6 Calories Without an erection................................3315 Calories POSITIONS: Missionary..........................................12 Calories Lying down ......................................69 Calories Standing up......................................812 Calories Wheelbarrow.........................................216 Calories Doggy Style.........................................326 Calories Italian Chandelier.................................2912 Calories ORGASMS: Real...............................................112 Calories Fake...............................................1315 Calories POST ORGASM STUFF: Lying in bed hugging.................................18 Calories Getting up immediately...............................36 Calories Explaining why you got out of bed immediately..816 Calories GETTING A SECOND ROUND STARTED: If you are: 20-29 years..........................................36 Calories 30-39 years..........................................80 Calories 40-49 years.........................................124 Calories 50-59 years........................................1972 Calories 60-69 years........................................7916 Calories 70 and over............................Results are still pending DRESSING AFTERWARDS: Calmly...............................................32 Calories In a hurry...........................................98 Calories With her father knocking at the door...............5218 Calories With your wife knocking at the door..............13,521 Calories [8\|]

theroebabe -> RE: Burning Calories (9/18/2004 8:15:23 AM)
So i guess if we take it to the max the best fat burning calories activities are: finding a 60-69 yr old to have sex with twice while his wife is knocking at the door, while explaining who that is knocking at the door, after you have jumped up right after the second act of sex on the italian chandalier, when trying to get an erection and putting on the condom, after you have removed her clothes in the car without her consent in the back seat. HMm not something i would want to try lolol. thanks for posting this!

smile2cu -> RE: Burning Calories (9/18/2004 8:38:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: theroebabe So i guess if we take it to the max the best fat burning calories activities are: finding a 60-69 yr old to have sex with twice while his wife is knocking at the door, while explaining who that is knocking at the door, after you have jumped up right after the second act of sex on the italian chandalier, when trying to get an erection and putting on the condom, after you have removed her clothes in the car without her consent in the back seat. HMm not something i would want to try lolol. thanks for posting this! OK, OK, I'll try it.[sm=lol.gif] But first I'll have to install an italian chandelier in the back seat of the car. ~smile~ [image]local://upfiles/39715/DB32D103D42E4E7398660E644C817CCF.jpg[/image]

Devra -> RE: Burning Calories (9/23/2004 5:26:05 PM)
re: sub4hire Oh i enjoyed that hmm maybe that will these lbs off faster *smiles

velvettears -> RE: Burning Calories (9/26/2004 5:17:06 AM)
lol i really enjoyed reading this and if i didnt have a kid to burn off my calories, i would print this list a few copies and place them in each room, car...whatever lol. Heck i'm gonna do it anyways LOL

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