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Feelings about switches? - 6/7/2010 2:30:29 AM

AvaJLee

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Joined: 5/30/2010
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Do most Domme's here(lesbian in this case) avoid getting involved with women who
can and do switch and/or if they think of themselves as switches but if desired and the
relationship feels right can remain submissive only. Do or have you tested the waters
or do you run like the wind? Why?

AJL

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/7/2010 2:50:12 AM

MsLadySue

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http://www.collarchat.com/m_3114689/mpage_1/key_switches/tm.htm#3114689

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/7/2010 7:10:28 AM

allthatjaz

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I am a dominant female that enjoys dominating other females. I switch with my male partner. I would never and I mean absolutely never allow a female to dominate me.
I have had a female sub that would only submit to a female but happily dominate males.
I have had a female sub that would switch with both male and female.

When I am with a submissive female who is not a switch, I accept that all of her personality is not submissive. At work she could be the boss who delegates to her staff. With her children she is a leader that guides them into adulthood. She is not a doormat that allows the entire world to wipe their feet on her but she is submissive to one person and very likely one person alone. What is the difference between her and a switch? Why would a switch be of any less value? The switch may enjoy dominating someone but for one particular person she gives 100 % submission.

Some people have a problem with a female switch as if she has an impurity or something! It kind of ruins the sexual fantasy and they don't see beyond that.
Dominance and submission is much more than just a sexual fantasy to me. A female switch who's can reveal a deep submission to me is only a submissive to me. Whatever else she is has no bearing on the relationship I form with her.
Perhaps I have spent too many years in this lifestyle

but the longer I am here, the more I feel intolerant of the fantasists that really believe that a submissive can only be a submissive if she doesn't switch!

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/7/2010 9:46:06 AM

LadyNTrainer

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I'm partnered with a male pansexual switch, though I think the technical term for this orientation is "greedy". LOL He is collared to me, and he makes an excellent co-top for hot scenes where we get to share a subby boy. Works for us, and it creates positive opportunities rather than issues in the relationship.

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/7/2010 11:07:20 AM

LaTigresse

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Joined: 1/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AvaJLee

Do most Domme's here(lesbian in this case) avoid getting involved with women who
can and do switch and/or if they think of themselves as switches but if desired and the
relationship feels right can remain submissive only. Do or have you tested the waters
or do you run like the wind? Why?

AJL

I have absolutely zero problem with the idea of having a switch..........as long as she never forgets who the boss is (ME) and keeps the lines of communication open. No sneaking around and no lies.

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/7/2010 11:13:28 AM

VaguelyCurious

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From: United Kingdom
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Things that matter to me about a theoretical sub:

How she makes me feel.
How I make her feel.

Things I couldn't give a flying banana about:

How she labels herself.

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/7/2010 11:19:08 AM

LadyHibiscus

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Who cares if someone is a switch? If we like each other, it's all good.

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/7/2010 12:51:08 PM

SylvereApLeanan

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~FR~

I would consider a woman who identified as a switch, if she wanted to live as my slave, but she wouldn't be my first choice. My experience has been that switches aren't submissive enough for my tastes. They want to challenge my authority too often and in un-fun ways. Alternately, they want to dominate someone else without negotiating with me first. None of this is my idea of a good time or a healthy relationship.

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/8/2010 2:37:45 AM

AvaJLee

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Thank you all for your most enlightening answers.It gives me thought of how I
view my outlook and helps in my own reflection and my insecurities..Sometimes
I think that a lot of people scoff at someone who feels their heart and demeanor
can switch, as though it is uncontrollable. I think it is something that can be recessed
or brought out depending on the relationship with the other individual involved.

Thanks again,

AJL

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RE: Feelings about switches? - 6/9/2010 8:26:42 AM

Andalusite

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I'm a switch, and currently have a female submissive playpartner (she is service oriented with me, but had only been a bottom in her previous interactions). She's interested in learning to top men, although she doesn't consider herself to be Dominant. I don't have any problem with her budding interest in switching, and let her top me briefly in the context of a class, to pick up a new skill. We don't switch when we are just playing together. I've played with a couple of other women before, but only as half of a poly couple, and both were top/bottom switches rather than having a D/s or M/s dynamic at all.

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