RE: Mistress Unfair or no?

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/12/2010 3:38:52 PM

MercilessMarcy

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This relationship is doomed. Remember you can always walk out the door and not come back. She considers everything just perfect. You don't. End of story.

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/12/2010 3:58:12 PM

PeonForHer

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Why does the OP need to walk, MM? It seems to me that he needs most of all to learn how to be assertive, so that she, in turn, will learn that she - like most people in the world - can't get everything that she wants.

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/12/2010 4:38:37 PM

DarkSteven

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Why does the OP need to walk, MM? It seems to me that he needs most of all to learn how to be assertive, so that she, in turn, will learn that she - like most people in the world - can't get everything that she wants.

Agreed. They're 18 and 20,and likely new to relationships. Working through issues like this could save the relationship, which I think is doomed otherwise, and it will also be a great learning experience.

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/12/2010 4:39:45 PM

Politesub53

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Why does the OP need to walk, MM? It seems to me that he needs most of all to learn how to be assertive, so that she, in turn, will learn that she - like most people in the world - can't get everything that she wants.

She can though, just not with him. If she wants X, all she has to do is wait for the guy who is looking for the same thing.

The OP was silly to sign a contract and can always walk away, but dominant women can get all they want, even if it takes a little time finding Mr right.

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/12/2010 5:23:48 PM

Nineveh

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I'd agree with polite sub here. As far as I can tell there is an overabundance of men willing to suffer for a dominant woman.

She doesn't need to stoop to manipulative and deceptive behavior to get this, I just don't think she's realized that yet.

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/12/2010 5:30:02 PM

PeonForHer

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Then everything depends on what she feels for him beyond her kink. If she only cares for him in terms of how he satisfies her kink - then, fuck her. He should walk.

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/13/2010 3:45:39 AM

Politesub53

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Then everything depends on what she feels for him beyond her kink. If she only cares for him in terms of how he satisfies her kink - then, fuck her. He should walk.

So surely the time for him to speak up, would have been before taking the relationship in a D/s direction ?

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/13/2010 4:26:02 AM

PeonForHer

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True - but that's spilt milk, now. Whenever the problem started, whatever chance it's got of being solved, the solution still seems to me to be that the OP needs to assert himself.

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/15/2010 3:04:55 PM

January

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Hi Ambition,

I'm hoping you've been able to read some of the responses. Please post and tell us how you're doing.

My feeling is you and your GF are experimenting with BDSM, and you've gotten the short end of the stick. Her whipping you doesn't concern me nearly as much as her refusing to listen to you. Her inability to allow you to communicate is, in my opinion, bullying. In my life, it would be a relationship breaker.

How long were you living together before she sprung the contract on you? Was she always mean to you? What are you getting out of the relationship now? Back before slavery? How experienced is she in BDSM? My feeling is she's using your slavery an excuse to be a full-on, selfish and immature bitch.

Since she refuses to communicate, and won't listen to your calm arguments attempting to insure your safety, I think talking to her is futile. You've tried already and it hasn't worked. I agree with the other posters who say tear up the contract and walk. Perhaps you'll be walking away from her rigid brand of slavery only--and not her.

Good luck.

January

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/15/2010 4:15:43 PM

sensubmaybe

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To me anyway, here is the operative sentence: "We'll my girlfriend has got me to join this little "Slave, and mistress" relationship about two month ago." Nowhere in this does it sound like you have any interest in this trip whatsoever. Maybe you are doing this to have girlfriend or get laid, but it sounds like you are putting up with the overall trip at best. You're 18 years old. If there's nothing in this for you, just leave and tell her to forget it.

Don't be surprised if she comes running after you. If she does, then you can decide if you want to be a part of this and she can decide if you are someone she has feelings for and could grow to really care about and love, or if what's important to her is playing out what she thinks is the mistress or domme role, in which case anyone willing to comply will do. Chances are, if you don't want to play she won't stick around. In that case count yourself lucky since she really didn't care about you.

If she doesn't come running after you, you still win and get to count yourself as lucky; you'll know that she and her trip aren't going to do you any good anyway. You're 18, go meet women, tons of them. Go fall in love and get your heart broken. Love and learn and see what's best for you. Trust your instincts and remember, don't stick around and put up with bullshit for the sex. And especially don't do it if the sex is used as either a reward (getting to have it) or punishment (not getting to have it). Some of the choices you make now and the dynamics you play out in relationships now could impact the relationships you get involved in and your role in them, for the rest of your life.

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RE: Mistress Unfair or no? - 6/17/2010 12:23:46 PM

rob425

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First and foremost that "contract" is legally void cause you can't contract that. So really that contract is nothing. and maybe if she was alittle older she would know that

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