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lally2 -> RE: letting go (6/13/2010 12:50:54 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Icarys
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That's the nature of people to a degree though. A willingness to look over things in all aspects of life rather than facing things for head on. If people spent time focused on fixing themselves instead of expecting others to find those issues for them(or just plain looking the other way entirely because they can't or don't want to look inside), they might be further along, rather than taking years after the relationship has began to get to a "sweet" spot.
to be honest though, i dont think generally that people are that good at looking at them selves. they dont see the common denominator as themselves, not because they consider themselves perfect at all, just that they see themselves from the skewed perspectives that got them to who they are right now. most people feel justified that they are a certain way because of life and things happening to them. the next step of course is to deal with those certain ways if they keep proving to be the common denominator in every relationship they end up leaving. but the trick is recognising that, not many people do.
part of my letting go curve was recognising my mistakes in the past and owning up to them and realising my part in things going wrong. once you start on that path it gets easier and you get kinder to youreself, but i do remember a time when i blamed everyone else and did not want to see how my mindset and views on love, life and the universe had affected people who loved me. it was all theyre fault and none of mine.
it was liberating to realise this in the end because i then had the insight to avoid the problems that had occurred before. not easy, barriers and blocks are built up for a reason, but at least recognising them meant that i had a better chance of making my partner happy.
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