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I was stunned to realize that nuns and monks and priests are expected by society to not abstain. 

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

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I was stunned to realize that nuns and monks and priests are expected by society to not abstain. 

Yes they are expected by society to lose their virginity. Many people were faced with strong criticism and rejection even from their own families when they decided to become monks, priests and nuns. In this phase - before actually becoming what they are - they were faced with criticism and rejection by some or by many because of their decision.
Later, when they actually became what they are - they are no longer expected to lose virginity - but before that they were sometimes strongly criticized for their decision.

Many parents try by all means to prevent their children from becoming monks or nuns!!!

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this slave doesn't see how a Master submitting or a slave dominating makes them stronger or more courageous than the those who don't. no better or worse than those who don't, merely different. perhaps they have learned through experience what works best for them and confidently represent it with the "Never!" statement?

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ORIGINAL: DisenchantedLife

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this slave doesn't see how a Master submitting or a slave dominating makes them stronger or more courageous than the those who don't. no better or worse than those who don't, merely different. perhaps they have learned through experience what works best for them and confidently represent it with the "Never!" statement?

and I agree.

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

There are some things that (in my opinion) are not a big deal at all, but some people claim that they will never ever do them.
Never ever. Under no circumstances whatsoever.

As an example I will mention some common claims of some people:

1. I am just a Dom(me) I will NEVER switch.
2. I'm a switch but I will NEVER switch with same person. If I am submissive to him/her, I will always be submissive to him/her. If I am dominating him/her, I will always dominate him/her. But I will NEVER change my role with a single person.
3. I will NEVER top men.
4. My subs will NEVER have sex with me / My subs will NEVER penetrate me. (Yes some lifestyle dommes say this in their profiles, too, not just pro's)

There are more examples, but I can't recall all of them now.

I want to ask, why are these things such a tremendously big deal?

If you are a Dom(me) why you think it is so fucking extremely hard or impossible for you to even try switching or submitting even for just a short time?

If you are a switch  in a good D/s  relationship with one person, why you think that the harmony of the relationship will be destroyed forever if you try switching with him/her, even just for a very little time? Yes you switch, but you are always in the same role with the same person. Why is it so unimaginable to try switching with the same man or woman?

You are a switch and a bisexual woman, but you claim you will NEVER top men, no matter what. Why is that so? You can submit to men, submit to women, top women, but you think it's absolutely impossible for you to top men. Why is that so?

If you are a domme and you say that you'll NEVER have sex with your subs or let them penetrate you, why is that so?

I find this topic very interesting and I am looking forward to interesting answers.

• Allow someone to abuse my wife, family, property or pets.
  
• Allow anyone in my care or under my protection to be harmed.
  
• Allow Disabled people, children, the elderly, Priests & Nuns of any religion to be attacked. 
• Allow some one to walk over me or force their beliefs on me.

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ORIGINAL: leadership527

See.... This EXACTLY why I'm not a big believer in absolutes

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ORIGINAL: porcelaine
Although I've had a few fall by the wayside there are three that still remain. I'm fairly confident it would take an act of epic proportion to make me bend. In the long run it depends on your rigidity and the value assigned to your given stance.

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ORIGINAL: leadership527

But... you know... highly unusual situations happen with depressing regularity.

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As soon as I start contemplating a "yes" answer, my brain populates with all the boundary conditions that might come up... unlikely as some of them may in fact be.

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ORIGINAL: porcelaine
Exceptions are borne out of the unusual I suppose.

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As for absolutes, those are constants I choose to keep in place. That doesn't mean an alternative avenue is never possible. I merely refuse to take it in certain situations.

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ORIGINAL: leadership527

I often wonder if other people's lives are truly as "usual" as they say or are they simply not paying close enough attention

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That can be said because the entire system of mathematics is constructed in a logical, orderly fashion.

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But if I stretch the meaning of the word "absolute" to include "things which are highly unlikely to change" then there are lots of "absolutes" in my life. For instance, I think it's a pretty safe bet that I will absolutely never strike Carol in anger.

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If you are a Dom(me) why you think it is so fucking extremely hard or impossible for you to even try switching or submitting even for just a short time?

To avoid making multiple quote boxes until I go blind or crazy, I'll just type within the quote box in this color.

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

There are some things that (in my opinion) are not a big deal at all, but some people claim that they will never ever do them.  

Never ever. Under no circumstances whatsoever.

As an example I will mention some common claims of some people:

1. I am just a Dom(me) I will NEVER switch. 
2. I'm a switch but I will NEVER switch with same person. If I am submissive to him/her, I will always be submissive to him/her. If I am dominating him/her, I will always dominate him/her. But I will NEVER change my role with a single person.
3. I will NEVER top men.
4. My subs will NEVER have sex with me / My subs will NEVER penetrate me. (Yes some lifestyle dommes say this in their profiles, too, not just pro's)

There are more examples, but I can't recall all of them now.

I want to ask, why are these things such a tremendously big deal?  Because they are my preferences and reflect my needs.  You think "...are not a big deal at all" because your needs are different from my own.  You may as well ask why being in love is a big deal to some and not to others...it just...is.

If you are a Dom(me) why you think it is so fucking extremely hard or impossible for you to even try switching or submitting even for just a short time?  I have been in Domme mode for somewhere around 4 years now, though I am a switch.  I made a choice to stop exploring my own submission further.  I'm also not poly, not bi-curious, arguing with me would be...futile.  It's not impossible for me to try submitting (I've never bottomed), it's a choice.  I won't; I would shut down all communication lines with anyone who even tried, even on someone I considered a dear friend.  
 
If this were only bedroom games to me, I'd see your point.  But each person is different, and with me, the emotional/mental part of power exchange is where I get my fix.  It would lose it's meaning/impact for me, killing the relationship by making it casual.  Some can manage to do this, but so far I'm just not one of those people.

If you are a switch in a good D/s  relationship with one person, why you think that the harmony of the relationship will be destroyed forever if you try switching with him/her, even just for a very little time? Yes you switch, but you are always in the same role with the same person. Why is it so unimaginable to try switching with the same man or woman?  Yes, it's unimaginable for me.  I have never been able to feel both ways about someone, it's either one or the other.  I considered it briefly, but if I can't feel it then what's the point?  For me, I believe I can't change gears and it would wreak emotional havoc. 
 
Maybe you're not talking about switching emotionally "yada yada" with one person, but more along the lines of dominants bottoming, and submissives topping, all in good fun.  I known many who do this.

You are a switch and a bisexual woman, but you claim you will NEVER top men, no matter what. Why is that so? You can submit to men, submit to women, top women, but you think it's absolutely impossible for you to top men. Why is that so?  This question doesn't apply to me, as I'm not bisexual and I love to top men I'm fond of. 

If you are a domme and you say that you'll NEVER have sex with your subs or let them penetrate you, why is that so?  LOL, I've been told that I've been having sex every time I flog or get very invasive/intimate with a sub.  I stay fully clothed though, and I've preferred it that way.  The biggest reason is that...I don't want to have vanilla type sex unless both of us are in love with each other and I feel secure that the relationship will be long term.  I sowed a lot of wild oats in my youth (17-23) and I just don't enjoy casual vanilla type sex anymore.  In other words, I'm not giving oral, vaginal, or anal sex unless someone is crazy in love with me and I'm in love with him too. 

I find this topic very interesting and I am looking forward to interesting answers.
It also sounded like more of a rant than just something you wanted to understand further.  To convince me otherwise, next time you start a thread please leave out the *F*.  You lost some respect points with me there.

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Why would you lose respect for your man if he submitted even just for a short time? Is submission a thing that one should be ashamed of? Is it the thing that automatically causes the loss of reputation and respect of other people? If so why?

It shouldn't be.  Maybe people worry too much about what others think and cringe when they should be walking tall.  I've known new guys who think because they're male that they need to be the dominant, and it's embarrassing for them to have to admit to having submissive feelings...I see this as a matter that needs deprogramming.   Maybe it's just a guy thing, and guys might worry if others assume he's a wimp...pussy whipped, yanno?  As for being outed to vanillas, I could see why a submissive male would be risking a lot.

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I would respect Master who has the balls to submit for a while even more than one who always says - never ever.
I would think the first to be stronger and more brave than the second.

I'm glad you're here at CollarMe, asking a lot of questions and learning as much as you can.  I'll look forward to more of your threads...what ever they are, they're never boring.

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T answer you question SNot, you need to live with and among people and really try to understand them for there is no one answer to your questions, there are as many answer as there are people. Honestly old chap, you urgently need to shut down your computer for a year and a day and go get field experience from real live flesh and blood human beings.

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