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johnswoodshed -> Wearing a collar and playmates: (6/25/2010 2:49:44 PM)
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I remember a time when being ask to wear a collar included ritual, and had substance that I don’t see a lot of anymore. I remember when young men and women (in the Seattle/Puget Sound region) who needed something different went to “after hour Lesbian clubs” and worked to get pick by an older Domme to train you to become sub and Dom and Domme. Where you worked at an apprenticeship of sorts before you could play with you first sub/slave. A place where you could make mistakes and be taught the correct way.
It was also a way of life that made you sub for a bit before you were turned loose on someone else, so you would know just what you are asking of someone. I still remember (45+ years later) a whip cracked across the ass for making a big mistake. I remember hating every minuet of some telling me what to do, I still do; though those 6 years in the Navy at war from a hello did mellow some of that. But I also remember how proud I felt when that old Domme said that I could “go forth and Sin all I wanted”.
That was in the very early in the 60’s and I had just got out of high school. There were No BDSM clubs, No BDSM, No munches, No bulletin boards with dial up service and No internet with web sites where anyone with a connection could declare themselves to Dom or sub and definitely no one could use the term Master. Master was something the community declared a person to be, it was very special and only good at that community. It was a title that was bestowed on a person but that person could never use it, the would have been presumptuous.
So now there are no real people/sub’s/ Dom’s/Domme’s any more if you read some of the profiles here on CollarMe and other sites. Is it that most don’t know what real is? Could it be that those same advertisers have never been with what a real ****** is. And could it also be that very few left around have any idea what it means to train someone else. Telling someone what to do and then punishing them is not training. It’s bullying.
So I’m 62 year old/young and stopped training sub’s/slaves about 12 years ago. Over the years I have had several of each. In the past all went on to a permanent owners or marriage with children, not for me. A year ago a lady (Kathy) in her early 40’s came to me with her life in chaos asking for help, and after talking to her for several day’s I agreed; under my terms. Now a year later she is still wearing my training collar and living with me 24/7 in a full time D/s relationship. She has in the past had limited experience with another women, she wishes to continue this exploration. I fully encourage her in this pursuit; keeping in mind this is a D/s’s household. I also know that we My self and Kathy are not perfect for anyone, neither are you perfect for us but time seems to have a way of taking off the ruff edges for all and for making a good match. Not all D/s’s relationships have sex as the central issue, while a person can be trained for great sex and it’s release, it still isn’t all there is, training, service, discipline, security, education, and evolving into the person you want to be are just as important.
SO my question is how much more real do some of you need with all of your canned reply’s and e-mails.
Thanks to all who took the time to read this.
JohnP
I don’t type, so please give me some leeway, I did spell check.
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