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CallaFirestormBW -> RE: would you live ion a bdsm co-op (7/2/2010 9:25:36 AM)
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I've been living in the Bladewing cooperative for 15 years... I'm actually going out on my own this fall, for the first time in 15 years, with -contact- with the House, but as a separate sub-household of my own (up until now, I've shared a sub-household with one or more other Keepers, non-participants, and servants).
In terms of the comments about offspring -- we've raised multiple offspring from toddlerhood to adulthood within the Bladewing cooperative, in healthy, safe, and productive ways that have been beneficial for everyone and haven't exposed the offspring to anything more complicated than learning how to deal with a large household, how to treat those individuals who choose service-style lives rather than the management track, or how to survive on the service-style track and choose individuals who know how to manage well if one prefers yielding authority to wielding authority. I am glad that I will not have to worry over-much about whether our offspring know how to properly care for those that they manage -- or know how to avoid the individuals who would abuse the authority yielded to them.
This doesn't mean that nothing funky ever happened at our house, but it is less complicated to assure privacy and make sure that individuals (regardless of age) who do not want to participate in or see certain behaviors are sheltered than most people think. Walking through our household, even when it was packed with people, including guests, one would never know that we were anything other than a perhaps-a-bit-archaic-because-we-have-servants kind of household, regardless of the rather intense fetishes that many of our members enjoy. Heck, I've had my father, in his 80's and very judgmental, visiting at our household and his only comment when everything was over was "It was so nice to have someone paying attention to when I needed a refill on my drink or a pillow under my feet -- was it just me, or are you always so lucky to have people around you who are so willing to help out with your guests without a single complaint? Even your mother wouldn't do that!"
I have to say that living cooperatively takes a LOT of coordination, and everyone has to be committed to it, or it becomes -really- old, -really- fast. I've lived in co-housing, poly households, and the House for my entire adult life -- 30 years, to be exact -- and I can tell you that the -idea- of living cooperatively is great, but the reality is a lot of hard work, and most people just aren't that invested in these kinds of ventures, once the ongoing routine necessary to keep things running settles in.
Calla
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