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Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 12:34:23 PM   
eager2servenc2


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If this has been covered before, i apologize, and ask to be pointed to that discussion. 

i was thinking the other day, it seems gay marriage legality (here in the states) is but a matter of time, and i was having a discussion with someone the other day and they said something to the effect of: What's next? What other kind of strange marriages might you see after this?  That raised a thought in my head: Unbalanced marriages, where One partner is not held to the same standards as the other, or where One partner is in charge of all finances, and owns all property, etc?  Has anyone thought of this before?  The example of a cuckolding Mistress comes to mind but in this case She wouldn't even be cheating in the eyes of the law.  i wonder if this type of thing will ever come to pass?  And is something others would be interested in signing up for? 
Thoughts?
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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 1:15:11 PM   
ChampagneMojito


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Personally, no.

I like my boy to have all the rights, financial stability and legal status that he is entitled to as a free citizen so that at all times, no matter what kind of a phase we're in, he has the means and ability to walk out the door as free as a bird.

Because that makes the fact that he stays and submits every day a million times more meaningful to me.

I'm not crazy about anyone signing away their rights on a permanent basis because of what they feel today. We all change. Why, is this something that appeals to you?

E x



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I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naïve or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman. ~Anaïs Nin

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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 1:19:41 PM   
AquaticSub


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This seems like a common thing actually. Certainly it's traditional in cases of male-female relationships. There was a time when women couldn't even own property for the most part after all.

Edited to add: This isn't something I'm particularly interested in, going either way. However, sometimes it just makes more sense for certain things to be in one partner's name. I'm more for having things in my partner's name because it's practical (lower car insurance or something) than because of our relationship roles. I do know that other people do follow the practice of having the dominant legally own everything.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 7/22/2010 1:41:12 PM >


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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 2:30:53 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


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A lot of power dynamics  even if the two are married are un equal,  unequal in a marriage isn't usual or un heard of. Or sometimes just plain relationships.

I'm not married but we have been together for 3 years in real life, and our relationship is un even, I am absolutely not held to the same standards he is. As his baby girl, there are somethings he just doesn't expect from me, that is absolutely expected of him. He's the bread winner, he's the provider for this family, I am not expected to go out and work and bring home the bacon. I am not expected to shoulder a lot of burdens, and he, as the man and the head of the house hold, and the provider, feels it's his job to shoulder the burdens.

But I also set the budget, somewhat. And I keep him up to date on what's coming down the bend we need to save for, or take care of.  When he forgets that a bill is coming due I remind him, and when he forgot to pay the bill I am the first one telling him so.

There's  in equality in every relationship to some degree I think.

There's certainly area's in life he's better at, more proficient at, and that I am un equal to keeping up at.

And vice versus, area's I excel in and am very competent in that he's unequal to keeping up to.



quote:

ORIGINAL: eager2servenc2

If this has been covered before, i apologize, and ask to be pointed to that discussion. 

i was thinking the other day, it seems gay marriage legality (here in the states) is but a matter of time, and i was having a discussion with someone the other day and they said something to the effect of: What's next? What other kind of strange marriages might you see after this?  That raised a thought in my head: Unbalanced marriages, where One partner is not held to the same standards as the other, or where One partner is in charge of all finances, and owns all property, etc?  Has anyone thought of this before?  The example of a cuckolding Mistress comes to mind but in this case She wouldn't even be cheating in the eyes of the law.  i wonder if this type of thing will ever come to pass?  And is something others would be interested in signing up for? 
Thoughts?



< Message edited by Toppingfrmbottom -- 7/22/2010 2:34:39 PM >

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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 2:47:31 PM   
BlaiddDrwg


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Obviously, you've never applied for a marriage license in North Carolina. There are many pages of paperwork, some requiring pages initialing and signing multiple times. Of all of these, the prospective bride writes and signs her name ONE time...to affirm that she submits her will and her property to her future husband. Technically, according to the law, I'd call that a fairly unequal marriage.

Thank God I got married in Florida.

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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 2:48:04 PM   
VaguelyCurious


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quote:

ORIGINAL: eager2servenc2

What other kind of strange marriages might you see after this?
So gay marriage is 'strange'?

Nice, OP.

If people want unbalanced marriages they can sort out their dynamics themselves-why have the law do it for them? The specifics of each marriage would be so varied that legislation would be difficult. And also pointless.


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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 5:41:36 PM   
eager2servenc2


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Didn't mean to call gay marriages strange. Poor choice of words.  My personal opinion is each their own. 

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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 5:46:07 PM   
littlewonder


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Where I come from that's pretty typical...it's the traditional marriage...husband owns the property, bank accounts, etc...It's pretty normal to me.

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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 6:12:30 PM   
eager2servenc2


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No, never married here and i suppose it shows huh. 

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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 6:25:30 PM   
blmtrsne


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We've got that kind of relation: I own everything and he brings home rthe money he earns. I take the decisions, he has a small amount of money so I can call him to do shopping. And if he gets some money (like an heritage or so), he'll transfer it to me. I even have a signature on his account and a permanent order to transfer his money above a certain amount on my account.
Problem is that it's all not legal: if there would be a problem, my husband/slave might go to court to get some (not all of course) back. We just don't live in such a society;

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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/22/2010 6:33:58 PM   
AquaticSub


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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlaiddDrwg

Obviously, you've never applied for a marriage license in North Carolina. There are many pages of paperwork, some requiring pages initialing and signing multiple times. Of all of these, the prospective bride writes and signs her name ONE time...to affirm that she submits her will and her property to her future husband. Technically, according to the law, I'd call that a fairly unequal marriage.

Thank God I got married in Florida.


As someone who got married in North Carolina less than a year ago...

WTF? That is not at ALL what we had to do. We filled out a form on the computer that was exactly the same for both of us and then we both signed some papers. There was nothing he had to sign that I didn't have to nor - for that matter - did ANY of our paperwork say that I submitted my will and property to my husband.

I think you are working from some very old information.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 7/22/2010 6:36:06 PM >


_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

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RE: Unbalanced Marriage (legally speaking) - 7/23/2010 7:30:38 AM   
BlaiddDrwg


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I'm glad to be corrected, then (and, that the state has finally caught up to this century).

Some friends of mine got married in 2000; and, I was basing my comment on the paperwork that they completed at that time. I used up a quarter- to a half-tank of gas circling the court house, while they were doing the forms.

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