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puella -> Boys... (7/25/2010 3:24:32 PM)
Have you ever sent a message to a female who proclaimed herself submissive, begging, cajoling or wheedling her to dominate you? What I wonder is this... what do you expect from this? If she 'submits' are you not domming her into your own fantasy? And what does that make you?

stef -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 3:32:54 PM)
Yes, about 5 minutes ago from someone in Pennsylvania. Is someone spamming everyone in the active list again? ~stef

puella -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 3:36:28 PM)
Who doesn't love stef? (not me!) But really... there are so many masses of 'subs' (male) who are so desperate as to mail submissive women, effectively attempting to 'Dom' them into topping them... I just wonder if any one of them is honest enought to explain the phenomenon? Ho hum... the mind wanderings of a spinster, etc etc.... Jen

kiwisub12 -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 3:44:00 PM)
I think you nailed it - desperation. The disparity between submissive men numbers and domme numbers ensure that there are a large pool of men with no way of "scratching their itch", thereby ensuring random emails to females on cm, regardless of orientation, begging for domination. After all, there might be some that would try domming and like it. Having been masterless for a short while, i sympathize with their plight. And to have the expectation that there isn't someone out there for them would be very depressing. edited to add - i received a cmail today from a dom in Dallas asking to talk, having not perused my profile. Unless there is some way for him to read my profile that doesn't show up , then he was randomly cmailing submissives, looking for an answer. Sounds like the same methodology as your submissives pleas.

puella -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 3:51:41 PM)
Your compassion is .... real beauty, kiwisub. Thank you for the temperance.

UniqueRaven -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 4:22:24 PM)
What i find endlessly fascinating is how when i check my "who's viewing me?" page i'll see a profile of a submissive man, and then shortly after when he writes me suddenly - Ta Dah! He's Dominant. Hmmm, quick shift of a status change? Or, on FetLife when a Dom will write me saying he's a Master looking for a slave - and when i check his profile i'll see he checked off the "is looking for: a slave" box not 5 minutes before. Interesting when a site keeps history like that. Honestly though, i just really feel sorry for these guys - it's so obvious that they're just looking for someone, anyone, to fulfill their needs - and not finding that other person out there. Unfortunately i'm not the one to fulfill them, though.

lizi -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 4:27:01 PM)
It happens fairly often that I get cmail from male submissives and I've always wondered about that. It'll range from them asking me to do a specific act like tying them up and beating them, to just general relationship questions. I've actually written back sometimes to ask why they think we would be a match since I am also a submissive, but I haven't gotten any answers. I believe that they are just playing a numbers game and hoping that maybe if a woman is interested in BDSM in general they'll scratch their itch for them. Desperation was mentioned, I'd say that's a fairly good summary much of the time.

hlen5 -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 4:58:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kiwisub12 ..........edited to add - i received a cmail today from a dom in Dallas asking to talk, having not perused my profile. Unless there is some way for him to read my profile that doesn't show up ,.......... Maybe your profile came up on his homepage when he logged in, and he saw you that way??

puella -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 5:09:52 PM)
Look I have to add that yeah, I can be (seemingly) bitchy.. but my post was not meant as a subbpy fem pile on for their woes as to male subs asking them to Domme them.. Honestly... I want to know the motivation. Trust me, I have gone to places within myself I wish I never have... not that that is where these boys have gone.....

sweetsub1957 -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 5:42:11 PM)
~FR~ I'm thinking that the Dommes outnumber the male subs to such a degree that only the cream of the crop manages to become Owned. Then some, not all, of the less-impressive submissive guys probably don't impress a Domme enough, so they go after the femsubs & try to change them. The sub men that have actually emailed begging and whining me to Domme them are mostly do-me's and I'm not impressed. I've also had "Dom" men cmail me and get all submissive in their letters. When I tell them they sound submissive, then they answer me back again and magically their profile says "submissive." Maybe it's desperation for Domination?? ~sweetsub~

DesFIP -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 5:42:56 PM)
It makes them someone who doesn't read profile. You've been on recently and you're female so you get a Please Mistress letter.

puella -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 5:49:52 PM)
WTF do I know... I am just another failure here. Was just wondering.....

porcelaine -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 5:52:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP It makes them someone who doesn't read profile. You've been on recently and you're female so you get a Please Mistress letter. This. ~porcelaine

sweetsub1957 -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 6:20:02 PM)
~FR~ Are the guys not going to answer.....? There're 14 posts already, counting this one, and no guys have said anything yet..... ~sweetsub~

DarkSteven -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 6:48:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957 ~FR~ I'm thinking that the Dommes outnumber the male subs to such a degree that only the cream of the crop manages to become Owned. Then some, not all, of the less-impressive submissive guys probably don't impress a Domme enough, so they go after the femsubs & try to change them. The sub men that have actually emailed begging and whining me to Domme them are mostly do-me's and I'm not impressed. I've also had "Dom" men cmail me and get all submissive in their letters. When I tell them they sound submissive, then they answer me back again and magically their profile says "submissive." Maybe it's desperation for Domination?? ~sweetsub~ This mystifies me. I find Dommes extremely easy to talk with. Just treat 'em like people. All a sub man has to do is to tell them a joke or two, and listen to them and talk to them. I get the feeling they don't encounter that much. Then again, since most of the sub men aren't sub men at all, and simply want a kitten with a whip to Top them... They send mail to sub women because they really don't give a damn about the recipient of the email except as a fantasy fulfillment system. They've likely been turned down by enough Dommes that they figure they might as well broaden their search...

juliaoceania -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 7:32:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: puella Have you ever sent a message to a female who proclaimed herself submissive, begging, cajoling or wheedling her to dominate you? What I wonder is this... what do you expect from this? If she 'submits' are you not domming her into your own fantasy? And what does that make you? I know this wasn't for us "girls" but just a couple of days ago I had this sub dude attempt to send me cock shots so I could humiliate him and tell him his dick was ugly. I didn't need to scroll down and look at the photo to know what he wanted. I didn't even look at it

WestBaySlave -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 7:36:04 PM)
I would never do this, though I've occasionally received messages like this. If a sub of either gender or a female dominant writes me seeking something other than conversation or advice, I'm assuming they can't read a profile. Actually, I'm not seeking at all just now, so this applies to dominant men, too.

juliaoceania -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 7:39:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WestBaySlave I would never do this, though I've occasionally received messages like this. If a sub of either gender or a female dominant writes me seeking something other than conversation or advice, I'm assuming they can't read a profile. Actually, I'm not seeking at all just now, so this applies to dominant men, too. This is because you are so damn cute!

GambitLeBeau -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 7:44:06 PM)
Sub male here. Never done this, and it's pretty damn easy to tell a sub from a switch or a domme on here... so I have no excuses for them. Yes, it's desperation.

sublizzie -> RE: Boys... (7/25/2010 7:44:27 PM)
It's sad that the literacy rate seems to plummet on this site, particularly in the summer. I've gotten emails from submissive men AND women looking for me to be their "dom". Um...Nope. Not going to happen. Frankly I doubt that many of the requests I get are real. I know a few are but not many. Most are just looking for some kinky sex, which is not my search, so they aren't close to what I'm looking for.

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