No Limits ??? (Full Version)

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lesliee -> No Limits ??? (4/17/2006 9:32:15 PM)

I always wondered about this. I mean doesn't everybody have a limit? i am not judging anyone but when i see a profile stating they want a no limits slave it makes me wonder and bothers me to a point. I mean i have limits, things like no kids, no dead people, nothing illegal etc. So does this mean a no limits slave would do these things if their Master asked them to? Maybe i misunderstand profiles like these, maybe what they mean is that the slave will have their limits but still these things are a limit regardless of that. I am interested to see your responses to this. Thanks.

Always,
lesliee




Lordandmaster -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/17/2006 9:37:05 PM)

We just had a long thread about this.  It starts here:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_305935/mpage_1/tm.htm#305935




RiotGirl -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 12:08:18 AM)

uuuuh i'm complaining that this is in the wrong thread.  There is a complaints thread!

and uh, yeah i do think they think that everything is not off limits.  Even illegal things are okay and i dould definetly most likely steer clear of them as its most likely where they want to head.  Otherwise it wouldnt really be that important, something that could wait after time and trust is built.




FangsNfeet -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 3:57:24 AM)

No Limits? Well, let's remember that there are subs and slaves who will do things weither they like the commands or not. Everyone has limits in what they like and then they'll tolerate everything else. However, I've always found limits in everyone I've meet. It's a bold claim very very few can actually stick to.  




Proprietrix -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 6:37:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lesliee
I mean i have limits, things like no kids, no dead people, nothing illegal etc. So does this mean a no limits slave would do these things if their Master asked them to?


I never understood the concept of throwing pedophilia into a list of limits.

If I started adding stuff like that, I'd also have to add:
treason,
embezzelment,
sticking hot turkey skewers in my eyes,
removing the hindlegs from poodles,
eating hair,
sucking the dirty mop water out of the mop,
dressing up invalids as clowns,
arson,
motor-vehicle theft,
.....

I tend to view hard limits as "I've seen a trend in the lifestyle of people doing XYZ. I want it to be clear that I will not engage in XYZ."
Since I have NOT witnessed any kind of trend whatsoever of pedophilia in the lifestyle, I really feel no need to add it to my hard limits. I'm ASSUMING the issue won't come up. If it did, I'd deal with it similarly to how I'd deal with the issue coming up of someone wanting to remove the hindlegs from poodles.

** editted because my damn cat stepped on the enter key before I was done typing the full post. **




PlayfulOne -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 8:06:44 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

quote:

ORIGINAL: lesliee
I mean i have limits, things like no kids, no dead people, nothing illegal etc. So does this mean a no limits slave would do these things if their Master asked them to?


I never understood the concept of throwing pedophilia into a list of limits.

If I started adding stuff like that, I'd also have to add:
treason,
embezzelment,
sticking hot turkey skewers in my eyes,
removing the hindlegs from poodles,
eating hair,
sucking the dirty mop water out of the mop,
dressing up invalids as clowns,
arson,
motor-vehicle theft,
.....

I tend to view hard limits as "I've seen a trend in the lifestyle of people doing XYZ. I want it to be clear that I will not engage in XYZ."
Since I have NOT witnessed any kind of trend whatsoever of pedophilia in the lifestyle, I really feel no need to add it to my hard limits. I'm ASSUMING the issue won't come up. If it did, I'd deal with it similarly to how I'd deal with the issue coming up of someone wanting to remove the hindlegs from poodles.

** editted because my damn cat stepped on the enter key before I was done typing the full post. **


Try not to make too many assumptions.   There are underage people on this site, so I don't see it as too bold to say one is not intersted.  I know personally of somone who was well under age, I met with them and talked with them for an ongoing period of months.  I detered her from the sharks and helped keep her out of trouble for that time.  Finally in the end when I wouldn't cross that line she found others who would.  I also know of another situation where a parent was tryng to obtain experience for their short person who was not of legal age. 
Be careful when you jump in with assumptions.

K




jamesthehumanrug -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 11:45:02 AM)

dearest lessliee,
no limits is a sign that you use to attract a certain type;
one who allows anything of the top without opinion or judgement ,and if you have something to say; its understood, in the beginning you are ,probably out....
i ,understand no limits
i ,rather have someone who wants no limits ,so i can trust them ;no matter what decision they have to make,
if someone is killed ....do you think the president doesnt ,also make those types of executive- decisions?,and,
do you know better?
no limits is a fact;
it is asked for;
take it or leave it;
you'll find out, if you have limits or,not ,with this type of person,
to me:  it's the top of tops ,and the bottom of bottoms, that has no limits ,and, that's o.k. ,for me!,
unless,OF COURSE: i DO know better....




Slavebitch11 -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 2:01:27 PM)

I'm rented out by my Master but I still have limits, albeit ones that he decides. He knows me, I think, better than I know myself as regards limits and I'm happy for him to set them.  Everyone has limits of one kind or another. Those who say they dont have limits are deluding themselves...and others.



quote:

ORIGINAL: lesliee

I always wondered about this. I mean doesn't everybody have a limit? i am not judging anyone but when i see a profile stating they want a no limits slave it makes me wonder and bothers me to a point. I mean i have limits, things like no kids, no dead people, nothing illegal etc. So does this mean a no limits slave would do these things if their Master asked them to? Maybe i misunderstand profiles like these, maybe what they mean is that the slave will have their limits but still these things are a limit regardless of that. I am interested to see your responses to this. Thanks.

Always,
lesliee




windchymes -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 4:13:39 PM)

IMO, and mine only, the only reason someone would want a "no limits" relationship is because they have some fucked-up shit on their mind that they want to do....just to say that they did it.  And this would be the only way they could find someone stupid enough to agree to it.

If they didn't, they wouldn't be so obsessed with the idea.  It wouldn't matter.




LadyRoseNThorns -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 4:26:38 PM)

Someone with no limits?  Run do not walk, do not pass go, do not collect $200.
 
Everyone, has limits.  Dominate or submissive, those who say they don't?
 
RUN FOREST RUN!




starymists -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/18/2006 4:54:54 PM)

Perhaps, and just perhaps, a 'no limits slave' isn't a place where he/she is willing to start, but rather the place where he/she would like to end up. Speaking for myself, I don't have to set the limits. I know what my Dominant will do and won't do. I know there are places that he will never go, because they are areas that just don't float his boat. As those areas happen to encompass areas that I'm not likely to want to go, it becomes a non-issue. That being said, I have not ever billed myself as a no limit slave. I do point out in my profile that I would like to have a relationship in which I would no longer need a safe word, and at this point, I have that relationship, but its not for lack of limits.
 
Generally, I only need to ask one question of a no-limit slave...and that question is "Are you willing to die if you Master deems it so?" A question designed to really think about the consequences of advertising something that you can not deliver. While many on this site recognize that there are just certain things and ethical Master wouldn't ask you to do, there are just as many abusive people who can and will ask you to do things that you have no business doing. And in my world, having a Dominant is NOT an excuse for breaking the law, amongst other things. But that's just my point of view.




feastie -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 1:32:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jamesthehumanrug

dearest lessliee,
no limits is a sign that you use to attract a certain type;
one who allows anything of the top without opinion or judgement ,and if you have something to say; its understood, in the beginning you are ,probably out....
i ,understand no limits
i ,rather have someone who wants no limits ,so i can trust them ;no matter what decision they have to make,
if someone is killed ....do you think the president doesnt ,also make those types of executive- decisions?,and,
do you know better?
no limits is a fact;
it is asked for;
take it or leave it;
you'll find out, if you have limits or,not ,with this type of person,
to me:  it's the top of tops ,and the bottom of bottoms, that has no limits ,and, that's o.k. ,for me!,
unless,OF COURSE: i DO know better....


So, if the top decides that you should kill your children and eat them...do you plan to barbeque them or will the top make that decision too?  If the top decides that your left nipple is offensive and cuts it off...that's ok?  Suppose you have to go to traffic court and your top decides that you must go naked, except for your diamond studded cock ring, you gonna do that?  Let's go further...let's apply this concept only in the sense of a scene.  The top, who, btw, is a stranger to you, plans to insert a light bulb in your ass before he canes you to orgasm or near orgasm.  Do you really want to spend four hours in surgery, having the glass picked out of your rectum and lower colon to satisfy him? 




twicehappy -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 8:25:36 AM)

I question the no limits statement myself, everybody has limits. Think the show Fear Factor, i see them do stuff i would not consider for a million dollars.

Personally i feel these folks need to consider the infinite possibilities of what they can be asked to do or have done to them before they state no limits in their profiles.

I for one pass by any Dom/Domme profile stating they are looking for a no limits slave.




pissdoll -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 9:09:22 AM)

i think we all know that the term "no limits" when it comes to bdsm is a figurative statement.
any master or slave who truly has NO LIMITS is so severely mentally ill, he or she should not be in the general population.
How many slaves would sit there while their Master began to chop their arm off slowly from the fingers to the shoulder?
For the most part, when the catch phrase "no limits" is used, it is under the assumption of "hurt but not harm."
However, there was the case in Germany a few years back where a man posted online that he was looking for someone who he could kill as a sexual act and he received numerous responses.  He videotaped the session of the man he killed and the man was begging for it. He obliged.
There is always the problem that if you say no limits, someone might indeed take you seriously....




bandit25 -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 9:12:46 AM)



When some people say "no limits", they mean it.  Of course, they are referring to someone else...




swellslave -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 10:45:28 AM)

Even a snuff slave will have limits of some sort. i would want to know about how it would all happen, rather than just being randomly run down by a car or something.

"No limits" is about an attitude, destination, and destiny.




HayaSierra -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 12:05:26 PM)

Greetings everyone,

This is something that always seems to bring up discussion, and an area where I would like to comment. No limits to me means no limits within reason and within the frame of the Law. This means, that even though I am a Dominant, I am still bound by my Spiritual ground rules and by Human/Mainstream Law in my behavior and orders towards my slaves and those who completely put themselves into my hands.  But it also means, anything that does not break these things, no matter how uncomfortable the thought for a slave, they are required to carry out any action I order. Silly stuff. Stupid stuff, useless stuff, tedious stuff, things that they just don't want to do for whatever reason. I never break health issues -- such as make one who is allergic to milk drink milk -- but if a slave simply does not like something -- it is fair game. Not for everyday use mind you, but there can be occasions when there will be tests.

It is also about trust. There was the time right after Rokarr begged for my Collar, and within about an hour of it, that I took out the following: a bag of cat-treats, and a small piece of chocolate that he did not see. He was kneeling, and thus not able to see my actions -- I was very obvious about the cat-treats, opened them, took one out, told him to close his eyes. Then I let him smell it again, before putting it aside and inserting the small piece of chocolate into his mouth. No protest. No hesitation. That is what I was trying to see. That to me is a sign of no limits. He knows his place in comparison to me, and he knows I will not harm him willfully, and that is all I need to know on an occasional level. Does this mean I will never make him eat a Cat-treat? No. It just means that when I tested his willingness he didn't do anything that would have been considered anything less than complete obedience.

This level of obedience and trust is also not something that I would expect from anyone right from the beginning, but something that would be worked towards slowly and with training. It basically to me means that when I say something that you simply don't want to do (but which is safe and not illegal) you would obey and do so without protesting or whining. These things should never be as bad as to cut off a body part, or to break the law, they could be as simple as -- hold still in this pose while I tease you after 37 days of chastity and no noises of whimpering even! Or about keeping to strict protocol of behavior even if you don't like it, or even about simply eating your food with a little dog-food sprinkled on top, something many would find distasteful. It is not only about willingness to do things you would otherwise not do -- but also about having the discipline to follow through on harder items that before your training might have been impossible for you to do.  That is where Hanian discipline comes into play. As for the teasing in the pose, Rokarr did that as well. No noises, no movement. Perrfect!

In life it gets a lot harder than random tests of obedience. A slave of mine has to prove that they are truly mine as time goes on, and this touches into various aspects of life -- not just things such as following protocols and minding their duties -- it meants that they live by protocol and their laws even when not at my house, also that they are required to get along with others within my house even if they don't like them, to respect the Authority of those I appoint above them as Overseers and supervisors, to treat free people with a certain amount of respect even if those are ones that they don't like, and otherwise place their whole lives and everything thereof before my feet. I don't have to tell any of them to get a surgery or anything else silly or useless -- but I might tell them that they will cross train into another profession, or will form bonds of friendship with another of my household, or even the most common form -- to adopt the culture and traditions of my house into their own lives. It may come in the form of chastity, it may come in the form of quitting a bad habit, it may even come in the form of taking something seriously in study that one would have never considered before. This does not even scratch the surface, but that is where true no-limits come in handy, because I can use that willingness as a tool not only to increase trust between us, and the slave's trust in the "system" pe say, but also to enable him or her to find an avenue for growth and eventual happiness.

As for limits, I'm sure many would consider it a hard limit to truly give up your freedom. No only in words, but in actions and in thoughts -- and move out to the middle of nowhere Kansas. To change what you wear, what you eat, how you sleep, the language you speak, the festivals you celebrate, perhaps even changes in professions and how you treat others around you. It is a big step, and unless I aim for no-limits in many of mine, these steps cannot be taken in confidence in due time.

Will those in my household have a safeword after a while? No. Does my Beloved have a safeword? No. Is he to tell me when he feels pain, discomfort, or if there is any chance something might not be planned result -- yes. Do I push him in his Growth? You bet!

Would one of them do something bad/immoral/etc for me? Likely. Would I ask or order it of them? NEVER, because I am myself held to higher standards. Would one willingly suffer for me, even long term? Yes. Does this willingness make one of my household crazy, ill, or a bad person? No, it just means that they truly have given up their freedom. 

Haya Sierra ---

PS: Yes, I have YET to meet one slave of mine that does not have a slight degree of fear in their hearts when they realize just how lifechanging and serious the prospect of real Ownership is and when they realize that being owned by me is different from most modern expectations.  That is why I go slow, and proove myself over time. Then that little initial fear and nervousness turns into fierce loyalty and a level of discipline and obedience that I do not seen in many places.  




Dustyn -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 12:15:44 PM)

I've always thought that the phrase "no limits" meant that they are willing to at least consider, if not try, something once before making up their minds about it one way or another.

But that's just me.

- Dustyn




Lordandmaster -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 1:19:45 PM)

I don't "know" any such thing.  Neither can you "know" this unless you've met everyone in the world who has ever used the term, and also have determined that they all intended it figuratively.

But I've already said everything I have to say about "no limits" on the other thread.

quote:

ORIGINAL: pissdoll

i think we all know that the term "no limits" when it comes to bdsm is a figurative statement.




dorsaisgirl1 -> RE: No Limits ??? (4/19/2006 3:06:35 PM)

i agree with lesliee however will not make any further coment then that becouse people have bilt there whole life around this concept and tend to get pissed off when there dream world is threatend .this is a good thread to start how do you react when your ideas and concepts are chalenged may it be in bdsm or religon?




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