RE: All complaints go here! (Full Version)

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BitaTruble -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:30:51 AM)

ENOUGH! This has gotten WAY out of hand! First, we need to establish the ROOLZ of complaining. Then we will have to hire the Complaint Police to make sure those roolz are followed. Then we will have to come up with appropriate punishment for the breaking of the roolz which will be established otherwise chaos will ensue! That just can't be allowed to happen. So, we have a job to do here people. It's serious. It's deadly. So, put away the TIC's right NOW and let's get to work.

ROOLZ

#1. You cannot complain about something which has already been complained about.

#2. All complaints must be quality complaints. Quality is NOT subjective. I will determine if something is quality or not because I'm a grandma and I know a quality complaint when I see one.

#3. All complaints must be submitted in writing. There is NO exception to this rule. No fair calling up the complaint department. Everyone knows the customer service sucks and we will be inundated with plausible deniability. This is unacceptable, people!

#4. Each complaint must be backed by empirical and/or scientific data to ensure it's an actual, factual complaint and not something that is being complained about on a supposition or a whim. Only TRUE complaints will be allowed.

#5. Each complaint must be paid for at the cost of $.02. If you don't drop at least $.02 into the bucket, your complaint will not be taken seriously. Failure to pay will result in forfeiture of said complaint. We need to get the bills paid. You think this department runs for free?

#6. Each complaint must go into one of the established categories reserved for complaints. Any complaint which falls outside these category's will be considered a whine and not a complaint and will be dealt with by the Federal branch of alcohol and cheese consumption.

#7. All complaints must be submitted on their own complaint forms. No more multiple complaining. It screws up the paper work then no one knows where to file anything.

#8. All suggestions for improving these roolz should be sent, in triplicate to Benji on the other side. IN TRIPLICATE people. We need copies for the file, the head office .. and we're running out of toilet paper in the men's room.

Please note, these roolz are subject to change without notice and you will be expected to adhere, retroactively, to any new roolz established before you know them.

Ok.. chop, chop. Let's go.



CERCKL -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:34:36 AM)

I want to complain that Riot is picking on me and that this is still in 'General BDSM' and not "Polls and Other Random Stupidity" and that as entertaining as this has been that Riot and I aren't getting paid to entertain all those who are reading this thread and not actually complaining themselves and that I have to go to bed so I can get up in five hours to go to work and that...

C



BitaTruble -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:38:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CERCKL

I want to complain that Riot is picking on me and that this is still in 'General BDSM' and not "Polls and Other Random Stupidity" and that as entertaining as this has been that Riot and I aren't getting paid to entertain all those who are reading this thread and not actually complaining themselves and that I have to go to bed so I can get up in five hours to go to work and that...

C



You have been found in violation of roolz 5, 6 and 7. Please report to the principals office for disciplinary action.

Sincerely,

Bita S. Truble
Acting Head of Complaint Police Department



CERCKL -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:40:12 AM)

My complaint is that I complained before your roolz were posted...phhhtttt.

C



BitaTruble -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:41:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CERCKL

My complaint is that I complained before your roolz were posted...phhhtttt.

C



"Please note, these roolz are subject to change without notice and you will be expected to adhere, retroactively, to any new roolz established before you know them."



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:43:50 AM)

i want to complain that i some how missed the 3rd page of this thread and now have to catch up to all the ppl that complain too much



HCWT1 -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:46:15 AM)

I want to complain about the fact that ,i have to leave my very nice fluffy cloud,Climb on down at great risk to myself to point out the fact that,very few here dont even know how to complain with any conviction,people who actually think that complaining will change anything.
Come up and have a coffee with me on my cloud,and yual see what i mean.Noisie,dirty,egotistical,self destructive mortals,Pisssssssss.



BitaTruble -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:49:56 AM)

Riot and HCWT, you are both in direct violation of Rool #5. Please report to the principals office for fine assessment. You can pay the fine at the main desk.

With regards,

Bita S. Truble
Acting Head of Finance



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:50:22 AM)

i want to complain about C complaining about me.  And i WANT to complain about the fact that he thinks other ppl are actually entertained.  Yes, i will shrivel up and DIE, if i cant complain about the fact that he thinks we're funny! 

Ooooooh god i need to complain about Bita and her nazi rules.  i want to complain about the fact that she thinks anarchy and riots arent the same and there are NO roolz in anarchy!!  i want to complain about the fact that she thinks i or anyone else will follow any sort of rules as anarchy is already reining!

pft

and i want to complain about the fact that there is so much to complain about that i'm too overloaded to complain properly!  i want to complain about each and every usuage of every word and setence, along with sentence structure of her sentences. 

i also on my last complaint for this post.. need to complain that C is going to bed and isnt going to tough it out and complain like a responsible person would!  i want to complain that bita will also probably be leaving and the responsiblity of complaining will be left up to me and thats just not funny.  i want to complain on the fact that i'll just end up talking to myself



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:53:20 AM)

quote:

Riot and HCWT, you are both in direct violation of Rool #5. Please report to the principals office for fine assessment. You can pay the fine at the main desk.

With regards,

Bita S. Truble
Acting Head of Finance


oooooo i want to seriously lodge a complaint.  i'm complaining that Bita promoted herself

that she thinks i'd go anywhere with HCWT whose a cloud humping hippy

that i'd actually go to the principals office and not hang out in the hall ways complaining to everyone else about all the complainers.

and i want to complain about the fact that she thinks the principals office worries me in anyway = )  i'll just lodge a complaint!



BitaTruble -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:54:49 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl

i want to complain about C complaining about me.  And i WANT to complain about the fact that he thinks other ppl are actually entertained.  Yes, i will shrivel up and DIE, if i cant complain about the fact that he thinks we're funny! 

Ooooooh god i need to complain about Bita and her nazi rules.  i want to complain about the fact that she thinks anarchy and riots arent the same and there are NO roolz in anarchy!!  i want to complain about the fact that she thinks i or anyone else will follow any sort of rules as anarchy is already reining!

pft

and i want to complain about the fact that there is so much to complain about that i'm too overloaded to complain properly!  i want to complain about each and every usuage of every word and setence, along with sentence structure of her sentences. 

i also on my last complaint for this post.. need to complain that C is going to bed and isnt going to tough it out and complain like a responsible person would!  i want to complain that bita will also probably be leaving and the responsiblity of complaining will be left up to me and thats just not funny.  i want to complain on the fact that i'll just end up talking to myself



This is an extreme case. Since we can't mold you or beat you into compliance, there's only one thing left to do.

Hire you.

Congratulations. You are the new Vice-President in Charge of Mergers/Acquisitions/Purple Elephants/Mermaids and Auditory functionality.

Welcome to the team!



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 12:56:47 AM)

and i seriously have to complain again.  Every time i read "cloud humping hippy" i about die laughing, which of course means i have to report to Himself to explain and Himself did another "ooooooooh my" to me!



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 1:00:14 AM)

quote:

This is an extreme case. Since we can't mold you or beat you into compliance, there's only one thing left to do.

Hire you.

Congratulations. You are the new Vice-President in Charge of Mergers/Acquisitions/Purple Elephants/Mermaids and Auditory functionality.

Welcome to the team!


i want to complain about you thinking i'm extreme.  Or that i'd work for you nazis poor english company of creating a civilized complaining society instead of the continuation of my anarchic complaining society.  Plus, i want to complain about the fact that you already hired me with out me being agreed to be hired, and i want to know what the pay is <wicked grin>

on top of that! i want to complain about the fact that you actually remebered my fascination with turning Dominant ment into mermaids and that i consider myself a purple elephant.  BECAUSE, it makes me feel bad about my poor memory and i think thats highly inconsiderate of you

pppfffffft

double pfffffffft to your hiring (whats the pay?)

edit to add.. i havent another complaint at this moment to complain about



HCWT1 -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 1:01:27 AM)

Complaint,the finds officer will have to collect in person for this to work,thank you.



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 1:08:10 AM)

And i must warn you nazi person - that i'm going to complain so much yer gonna quit your job and my anarchic society will rien

HCWT - thats it, your suspended from being able to do anything other then turning into a mermaid.  i will NOT put up with complaints or posts that i cant understand!  Just for you, to fit your crime, you are now a purple mermaid.  Be wearing proper mermaid attire and present yourself directly to me so i can start discovering first hand about milking a man's prostate.  AND no complaining while i do it as it WILL hurt as i WILL enjoy making it hurt.  No complaining about the fact i'm going to enjoy painfully finding your prostate.  Mermaids dont complain!  If you progress and continue to do so, i will be forced to make you a purple mermaid with no mouth, which will force me to complain about the fact that i cant shove odd objects into it. 

i need to lodge another personal complain.  Himself has changed his mind and is not going directly to bed and i'm complaining about the fact that he shouldnt be allowed to change his mind and not bow down to any previous words he's said!

hrrrrrrump



BitaTruble -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 1:16:27 AM)

quote:

Plus, i want to complain about the fact that you already hired me with out me being agreed to be hired, and i want to know what the pay is <wicked grin>


You are confusing consensual BDSM with being drafted into the complaint department. Silly girl. Ok, truth. The pay sucks and the bennies are amazing. That should be enough for anyone.

There are some stale donuts around here somewhere and there is usually a pot of Turkish coffee brewing. Now, go sit down in your nice, big corner office and get to work. As an employee, you get special bitching rights which are reserved only for staff members.

Carry on!



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 1:22:02 AM)

quote:


You are confusing consensual BDSM with being drafted into the complaint department. Silly girl. Ok, truth. The pay sucks and the bennies are amazing. That should be enough for anyone.

There are some stale donuts around here somewhere and there is usually a pot of Turkish coffee brewing. Now, go sit down in your nice, big corner office and get to work. As an employee, you get special bitching rights which are reserved only for staff members.

Carry on!


LOL.  i want to complain that you ppl are wearing me out doing my civil duty to complain and i just yawned.  i want to complain that we have turkish coffie and C is always hollaring about wanting OUR coffee!  i will carry on, until i am forced to force you to quit your job so i can go back to my anarchic society.  i want to complain that i think this nazis realm and being a nazi might have some entertaining efects that you might actually convert me. 



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 1:24:36 AM)

quote:

LOL i love it, but i think your lifespan is optimistic!!! Why have one spot when we can spread the love, so to speak?!

Great effort, though


Owned you're in direct violation of article 15 in section 34543.45  It is not okay to NOT complain.  Nor is okay to thinly hide pessimism with an optimistic post! 



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 1:27:22 AM)

quote:

Ladies and Gentlemen, Masters, Mistresses, True Masters, True Mistresses, Subs, slaves, true subs, true slaves, Switches, and the undefineable,

After starting to read a whole whack of threads bitching and complaining about certain things, I have taken it upon myself to create a thread devoted ENTIRELY to bitching, complaining, whining, ranting, and, of course, people who post 1400 lines, but aren't ranting.


i'm going to have to let you know, that if you dont come back and claim and take responsibility of your thread i am going to continue hijacking it to the point of no return, effectively eventually closing it down.  DO you HEAR me?  If you dont cease and desist in this irresponsible behavior i will either turn you into a purple mutant elephant or a mermaid, depending on your gender.

NOW i will complain about being to lazy to figure out your gender.  So i might just have to make you a purple mutant mermaid cow effectively turning you into neither gender



RiotGirl -> RE: All complaints go here! (4/18/2006 1:35:30 AM)

i'm complaining that i already seem to be talking to myself.  i'm complaining that i knew it would get to this point and i'm also complaing about the fact that i'm going to bed.  Since i cant effectively complain over here.



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