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Burn out - 7/27/2010 7:00:23 PM

Nehemiah

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Every so often I experience burn-out from BDSM and fetish play. I used to experience the same thing with vanilla sex when I was younger and actually quit for about 7 years.

Anyone else ever get BDSM burn-out?

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RE: Burn out - 7/27/2010 7:03:21 PM

sexyred1

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I am burned out on everything there is to be burned out on.

It is exhausting.

(in reply to Nehemiah)

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RE: Burn out - 7/27/2010 7:07:40 PM

BitaTruble

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I've never experienced BDSM burn out, never had the desire to stop indulging/engaging and when circumstances have forced it, I have not been a happy camper at all.

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RE: Burn out - 7/27/2010 7:26:44 PM

blueicing

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I've been burned out twice and decided to quit everything bdsm related. Once was after I had been going to too many weekend long, out of state/out of country fetish events, sometimes more than one weekend a month. The second time was after I ended a long D/s relationship. I just went celibate for a year or two, and then came back when I was ready.

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RE: Burn out - 7/27/2010 7:29:33 PM

Maculate

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I have never had BDSM burn out, but my life does not allow for very frequent sessions. So I suppose the extreme moderation of it is what keeps it exciting and fresh for me. As for other things, I never feel really "spent" on activities and such, I just sort of replace them with other things and pick them back up later when I feel like I miss it enough.

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RE: Burn out - 7/27/2010 7:36:15 PM

MagiksSlave

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I get burn out usually after the end of a long term relationship. At that point I always seem to need to step back and take stock, usually resulting in months if not a year or more of time away from BDSM.

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RE: Burn out - 7/27/2010 7:47:54 PM

femasoslave

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No.......but I did with vanilla sex a long while ago but that was caused by depression

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RE: Burn out - 7/27/2010 8:14:37 PM

dreamerdreaming

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Fast reply:

No, but I do have vanilla phases that are quite lovely. They aren't due to D/s burnout, though. They're just me doing what feels good and right for me, at the time.

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RE: Burn out - 7/27/2010 9:25:18 PM

Chrisincuffs

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quote:

No, but I do have vanilla phases that are quite lovely. They aren't due to D/s burnout, though. They're just me doing what feels good and right for me, at the time

Kinda like that here, I think I do it just to remind myself where I really like to be

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RE: Burn out - 8/4/2010 11:36:36 AM

Nehemiah

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I've gone the celibate route when I've had sexual burnout. The longest celibate phase I've had was 7 years from 1987-1994. I probably would have broken my celibacy earlier but the Magic Johnson situation came along and I figured it was better to just continue the celibacy. I had offers but I turned them down for a long time. When I finally came out of the celibacy for what I thought might be regular vanilla it suddenly transitioned into BDSM.

Now I'm back to overindulging again but with BDSM instead of regular vanilla. I guess if I just learned to say "no" all of this could be avoided.

(in reply to blueicing)

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RE: Burn out - 8/4/2010 12:40:44 PM

kdsub

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I believe you should just forget thinking in terms of classifications. Otherwise be yourself at all times and if you are lucky you will find someone that on occasion matches your moods, wants, and needs…Or… cares enough about you to change their mood to match yours… or you theirs.

People spend too much time analyzing their feelings instead of acting on them.

Butch

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RE: Burn out - 8/4/2010 1:46:36 PM

CynthiaWVirginia

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Since I have had plain vanilla burnout for over seventeen years, it is hardly unexpected when I have burnout from D/s, too.

I need to take a big step backward...kind of like giving dead hopes/possibilities a funeral and mourning period.

When I know I won't be rebounding, that's when I'm ready again.

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RE: Burn out - 8/4/2010 1:56:06 PM

ResidentSadist

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I've never had burn out but I usually have a poly collective fueling the passions. If one person's energy drops, the majority refuels them. Unlike mono situations where if one persons passion fades, you lose half the interested parties and there is none left to play with. When there are 3 or more, it's easier to keep the momentum and creativity.

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RE: Burn out - 8/4/2010 8:00:54 PM

hereyesruponyou

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I have waxing and waning interests at times. There are some things that are always fun and get my interest up, but then there are others I can kind of take or leave anyhow, so leaving them for a bit is not hard. I have my husband to explore any specific fetishes I have and we can always scratch any itches that pop up for each other. The only area I really feel periodically overly interested, then inevitably burned out on is pursuing a separate D/s relationship. The hubby is a great bottom, but not overly submissive, especially in non-sexual areas. He tries as he knows that I have a part of me that is unfulfilled in this area, but he is so much more sexually oriented that he doesn't really get the power exchange part if it is not sexual. I am much more interested in the mental aspects and enjoy using the sexual aspects to enhance that. So periodically I get the itch to look for that special someone who "gets it". I typically put alot of time into getting to know a few people and have even taken on someone for as long as a year, but eventually life wins out and i feel stressed trying to do everything i want, and the D/s is the easiest thing to let go and or feel is not worth my time.

Sorry for the ramble...

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