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RE: A domme look - 8/4/2010 3:47:07 AM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Lockit you've brought up a memory, that sort of ties in. LOOK AT ME WHEN I AM TALKING TO YOU is a biggie with me. But so many subs get "trained" in that downcast eyes thing! Maddening.

I found that people who always prefer the downcast eyes in a sub are actually pretty insecure themselves and they are more worried about the subbie seeing that in their eyes. I find the eye contact absolutely necessary, because they might think that they can take more, but eyes will tell you if they can't.

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RE: A domme look - 8/4/2010 4:37:38 AM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

Is this like when a woman looks at a man like he's a tree and she's the monkey that's gonna climb him?

I know that look. I believe I know it well.

I don't think it's that look, sunshinemiss - but that was a hell of a good way of describing another sort of look women give. Well, if the bloke's in luck, anyway. Excellent!

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RE: A domme look - 8/4/2010 10:59:29 AM

LadyHibiscus

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I call that the licklickchomp look.

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RE: A domme look - 8/4/2010 11:17:58 AM

porcelaine

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

What is a hungry look of superior confidence?

I think the OP might mean where a woman looks at you like you're a big steak that she's going to eat. Confidence is ultimate: it doesn't cross her mind that you might object. Resistance is irrelevant. You're just something she's going to consume.

It's a lioness surveying her prey. There's no question that she'll strike, but merely the matter of when it will occur and the process she uses to disarm him. I don't attribute it to confidence but audacity instead.

~porcelaine

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RE: A domme look - 8/4/2010 11:42:32 AM

PeonForHer

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FR

Brilliant! Keep those 'looks' coming. I'll be paying close attention to them all just before bed tonight. :-)

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RE: A domme look - 8/4/2010 11:59:01 AM

porcelaine

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

FR

Brilliant! Keep those 'looks' coming. I'll be paying close attention to them all just before bed tonight. :-)

Nice to know we're contributing to your bedtime fodder.

~porcelaine

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RE: A domme look - 8/4/2010 12:41:03 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Take careful noes, Peon, or it won't count as "research"!

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RE: A domme look - 8/4/2010 12:58:09 PM

PeonForHer

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No worries, Lady Hib - my hand will be moving vigorously over those sheets of paper.

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RE: A domme look - 8/15/2010 11:20:53 AM

TexasMaam

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It is far too easy to project one's BDSM persona on completely vanilla individuals in vanilla settings. It is a pitfall to be guarded against.

In an imaginary world, it would be lovely to encounter submissives in venues of mutual social or professional interest, to flirt with them or initiate contact in a discreet manner that could result in that 'sub of a lifetime' connection, but the possibility of same is remote, at best. While it can, and does happen, (I'm certain you'll read responses here of tantalizingly tempting encounters that may, or may not be based in fact) in my opinion a potential successful outcome is one in which the ends do not justify the means.

Projecting a BDSM orientation on an individual who merely displays what we consider to be 'submissive' tendencies can wreak havoc in real time.

The subject is better suited to erotic fantasy than it is real life experience.

The risk of impacting a vanilla persona negatively on a deeply psychological or emotional level by erroneously approaching one with an assumption of bdsm interests that are in fact nonexistent carries with it tremendous responsiblity for that innocent party's future and wellbeing.

Stick to munches and/or known bdsm venues.

TM

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RE: A domme look - 8/15/2010 5:38:17 PM

GcupBitch

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I think the OP might mean where a woman looks at you like you're a big steak that she's going to eat. Confidence is ultimate: it doesn't cross her mind that you might object. Resistance is irrelevant. You're just something she's going to consume.

Yes. I don't think about it - I just know when I want something (someone), I'm going to get it (him). I'm quite sure that is reflected in My body language and expression.

< Message edited by GcupBitch -- 8/15/2010 5:40:17 PM >

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RE: A domme look - 8/15/2010 6:51:33 PM

PeonForHer

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Interesting ... :-)

< Message edited by PeonForHer -- 8/15/2010 6:54:16 PM >

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RE: A domme look - 8/16/2010 8:32:49 AM

thatsub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Lockit you've brought up a memory, that sort of ties in. LOOK AT ME WHEN I AM TALKING TO YOU is a biggie with me. But so many subs get "trained" in that downcast eyes thing! Maddening.

I found that people who always prefer the downcast eyes in a sub are actually pretty insecure themselves and they are more worried about the subbie seeing that in their eyes. I find the eye contact absolutely necessary, because they might think that they can take more, but eyes will tell you if they can't.

I always thought that eye contact was sign of respect and honesty. People who can't look you in the eye either are nervous and are trying to hide something or are afraid of you. I'd think that respect and is better than fear, since willful submission beats forced one.

Of course, eye contact can also be interpreted as a sign of confidence and some might be afraid that a sub is challenging Dom/me's authority. I think, LadyConstanze nailed it - those who can't handle eye contact from their subs are just insecure.

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