RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help?

RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (Full Version)

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Arpig -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:05:51 PM)
What happened to the "master" you referenced a few posts back?

laurell3 -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:06:39 PM)
Ok....if that works for you, go for it, but the "I hope my Master doesn't read this" post implies you might have a problem here. Think about what you're doing. Kink is never more important than respect.

ranja -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:07:14 PM)
hahaha... good luck on you girly... i think it is always nice to be in a position to train your very own 'Dom for the timebeing' in 'the kink'

Glasgow -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:10:26 PM)
I was collared a while ago, but circumstances have dictated that I can't see him at all. In fact, the only communication we have is the occasional e-mail. It'll be a full year or two before I get to see him again.

domiguy -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:41:45 PM)
In your profile it says that you are happy and no one should try and steal you. You are very tiny so stealing you wouldn't be very hard. Can you fit in a Shop-Vac? I have found that even though someone might crave a realtionship that at some point they often find something substantially lacking within their vanilla partners. This is why 'nilla boy suggested that he might attend the Sally Struther's School for Doms to try and meet your needs. Yuck! Anywhoooo, I have found, in my walk through this world, that women are much more likely to read up on and research bdsm before engaging, where men just tend to "do it." Now if a sub was really interested in needle play, I might do some research on the subject or buy a pin cushion before engaging in such an activity. But in reality, I would try and avoid any major arteries, her eyeballs or her heart when gouging her with the needles. I think she would probably be okay and in time would probably learn to live with that new "twitch" in her left eye. I think you are kind of fucked in the choices you are making.

Glasgow -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:51:42 PM)
BJ, most of the time when you talk, I don't know entirely what you're getting at.

LaTigresse -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:52:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow I was collared a while ago, but circumstances have dictated that I can't see him at all. In fact, the only communication we have is the occasional e-mail. It'll be a full year or two before I get to see him again. I gotta ask........military or prison?

Glasgow -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:55:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow I was collared a while ago, but circumstances have dictated that I can't see him at all. In fact, the only communication we have is the occasional e-mail. It'll be a full year or two before I get to see him again. I gotta ask........military or prison? I live at home. Someone is looking at homelessness if they pursue a relationship with their master :(

LaTigresse -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 12:59:29 PM)
Ah ha! Thank you......it was the time frame got me wondering.

Glasgow -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:01:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse Ah ha! Thank you......it was the time frame got me wondering. Well he's already been in the military and I don't know if I would keep pining after him if he was in prison.

laurell3 -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:04:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow BJ, most of the time when you talk, I don't know entirely what you're getting at. He's getting at the fact that you don't have to "teach" them anything. Other than risky edge play type of activities where they should research and preferably learn from another Dom knowlegable in the area, what would YOU teach a Dom other than what your likes and limits are? It's not that difficult. Don't make it rocket science. Tell him what type of dynamic you are interested in, what you need to be safe and secure and let him do his thing. Why would you do otherwise? And why are you calling this guy that you are afraid will disapprove of your posts, but really isn't your Master since you're thinking about other guys...Master? I'd really rethink where you're going here.

domiguy -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:08:50 PM)
So your only choices are to wait for a year or two or date an old boyfriend. Do you have aplastic anaemia or some sort of another Chronic immune deficiency disorder that does not permit you to venture outside? I am not sure, but if you are 5' tall and weigh 96 pounds I would think that there has to be someone out there that might enjoy that kind of a thing. Time to broaden your search beyond the two guys you know.

Glasgow -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:10:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow BJ, most of the time when you talk, I don't know entirely what you're getting at. He's getting at the fact that you don't have to "teach" them anything. Other than risky edge play type of activities where they should research and preferably learn from another Dom knowlegable in the area, what would YOU teach a Dom other than what your likes and limits are? It's not that difficult. Don't make it rocket science. Tell him what type of dynamic you are interested in, what you need to be safe and secure and let him do his thing. Why would you do otherwise? And why are you calling this guy that you are afraid will disapprove of your posts, but really isn't your Master since you're thinking about other guys...Master? I'd really rethink where you're going here. Someone who speaks words I understand! I call him master because that's like his name. Just weird to refer to him otherwise. And I still think he's my master, even though I can't see him. I dunno, do people normally remain abstinent for years when they're waiting to get back together with a specific person?

LaTigresse -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:20:08 PM)
MOST people do not wait years to 'get back together' with someone. We kinda move on to other pastures.

laurell3 -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:21:47 PM)
Some "people" probably do, some "people" probably don't. Why would we care what anonymous "people" do anyway? Those that do probably don't entertain thoughts about getting back together with old boyfriends at the same time. I sure as hell wouldn't have considered that when I was 18. As I understand it, your parent's disapproval centers around the bdsm, so I'm not sure how getting a new Dom would help that issue. Look I'm going to say the same thing I did about the parental issue. WHAT do YOU want? How are you going to go about getting that? What is your plan for your life? What is your plan for relationships? These are the questions you need to answer. No one here can do that for you. I'm sorry. You're not unintelligent, use your head and really be honest about what you want and need.

Glasgow -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:32:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 Some "people" probably do, some "people" probably don't. Why would we care what anonymous "people" do anyway? Those that do probably don't entertain thoughts about getting back together with old boyfriends at the same time. I sure as hell wouldn't have considered that when I was 18. As I understand it, your parent's disapproval centers around the bdsm, so I'm not sure how getting a new Dom would help that issue. Look I'm going to say the same thing I did about the parental issue. WHAT do YOU want? How are you going to go about getting that? What is your plan for your life? What is your plan for relationships? These are the questions you need to answer. No one here can do that for you. I'm sorry. You're not unintelligent, use your head and really be honest about what you want and need. You know I love you laurel, but that is so not the point. The point of the thread is how to introduce someone into being a domly-dom. After being muchly criticized about being a drama whore, I didn't want to bring up the issues between wanting to get back together with the dom I want and settling with an ex. Or about my parents.

leadership527 -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:34:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow You know I love you laurel, but that is so not the point. The point of the thread is how to introduce someone into being a domly-dom. You get them around someone you personally identify as a "domly dom" and you see if any of it sticks. Without knowing more about the exact places he wasn't domly enough (in your eyes) it'd be hard to get any more specific.

laurell3 -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:40:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 Some "people" probably do, some "people" probably don't. Why would we care what anonymous "people" do anyway? Those that do probably don't entertain thoughts about getting back together with old boyfriends at the same time. I sure as hell wouldn't have considered that when I was 18. As I understand it, your parent's disapproval centers around the bdsm, so I'm not sure how getting a new Dom would help that issue. Look I'm going to say the same thing I did about the parental issue. WHAT do YOU want? How are you going to go about getting that? What is your plan for your life? What is your plan for relationships? These are the questions you need to answer. No one here can do that for you. I'm sorry. You're not unintelligent, use your head and really be honest about what you want and need. You know I love you laurel, but that is so not the point. The point of the thread is how to introduce someone into being a domly-dom. After being muchly criticized about being a drama whore, I didn't want to bring up the issues between wanting to get back together with the dom I want and settling with an ex. Or about my parents. I'm not sure who called you a drama whore, but I would disregard those comments. You're 18. You're still finding your way in life. Flipping back and forth and being unsure is what most of us did at 18 as well. Anyone that criticises you for still being in that learning curve is being self-righteous and has forgotten what it was like to be very young. I told you, send him here. There are TONS of threads on various sites, books, meeting places and let him ask his own questions of the posters.

Glasgow -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:43:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leadership527 quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow You know I love you laurel, but that is so not the point. The point of the thread is how to introduce someone into being a domly-dom. You get them around someone you personally identify as a "domly dom" and you see if any of it sticks. Without knowing more about the exact places he wasn't domly enough (in your eyes) it'd be hard to get any more specific. One of the places in which he is not very domly is that he can't imagine himself in an unequally balanced relationship (in terms of power). So we might have a long way to go[8\|] But last night he called and expressed some actual interest, so I figured I should help introduce him.

Glasgow -> RE: My friend wants to be a dom. Help? (8/2/2010 1:45:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 Some "people" probably do, some "people" probably don't. Why would we care what anonymous "people" do anyway? Those that do probably don't entertain thoughts about getting back together with old boyfriends at the same time. I sure as hell wouldn't have considered that when I was 18. As I understand it, your parent's disapproval centers around the bdsm, so I'm not sure how getting a new Dom would help that issue. Look I'm going to say the same thing I did about the parental issue. WHAT do YOU want? How are you going to go about getting that? What is your plan for your life? What is your plan for relationships? These are the questions you need to answer. No one here can do that for you. I'm sorry. You're not unintelligent, use your head and really be honest about what you want and need. You know I love you laurel, but that is so not the point. The point of the thread is how to introduce someone into being a domly-dom. After being muchly criticized about being a drama whore, I didn't want to bring up the issues between wanting to get back together with the dom I want and settling with an ex. Or about my parents. I'm not sure who called you a drama whore, but I would disregard those comments. You're 18. You're still finding your way in life. Flipping back and forth and being unsure is what most of us did at 18 as well. Anyone that criticises you for still being in that learning curve is being self-righteous and has forgotten what it was like to be very young. I told you, send him here. There are TONS of threads on various sites, books, meeting places and let him ask his own questions of the posters. Oh, don't worry. Plenty of people said it, although in different words ;) I'll send him this way and see what comes of it.

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