RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7?

RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (Full Version)

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lusciouslips19 -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 7:53:47 AM)
Sounds to me like the "Dominant" in question didnt like the fact that the submissive wasnt sucumbing to online orders from a virtual stranger.

UniqueRaven -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 7:55:27 AM)
For me, the best relationship is one where i'm able to be uniquely myself - which is "me" as a slave, and includes the fact that at times i can be deeply submissive. At other times i can be funny, strong, outgoing, thoughtful, many other things. For me being submissive is an action, not a state of being. But getting to know someone? Some of the men i've been most interested in are the ones i've fought the hardest. i think it's that need to "feel the boundaries", like when you bring a dog home for the first time and they need to learn where the fence is in the backyard. And then men who work through that resistance of mine with patience and deliberate intent are the ones i bond with the most. So just be yourself - and if that means you're not a "fit" for a man on Yahoo, so be it. And OP - ditto to what Lockit said. i love your posts, i empathize with you and hope you slow down at some point. [:)]

Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 8:00:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow I don't care what he thinks, but I'm just curious as to whether or not this is usual. Usual for some, unusual for others. I don't think this guy is being very realistic with his expectations that you failed to live up to. Then again, if this guy knows precisely what he wants more power to him. He didn't have to go there with comments about you not being "real" that was just outta line and uncalled for.

sexyred1 -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 8:02:38 AM)
I wish everyone would remember that when a man says you are not "real" it simply means you are either not what he is looking for, you are not acting as he expects or desires or you have rejected him. Oh, and the same goes for subs who say Doms are not "real". It really simplifies things to know why that word "real" is being thrown about.

AQuietSimpleMan -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 8:15:30 AM)
I expect my partner to know that she IS submissive 24/7. This means that no matter what is going on... If I expect something of her, she knows it is her responsibility to Obey. This has nothing to do with how she talks or how she ACTS. because if her submission was an ACT I would relieve her of it as soon as I caught on. QSM

jujubeeMB -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 9:11:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 I wish everyone would remember that when a man says you are not "real" it simply means you are either not what he is looking for, you are not acting as he expects or desires or you have rejected him. This. I kind of think of it as a gift when someone tells me I'm not real, because then I can write them off quickly. And as for "acting submissive" all the time, yeah right [;)]

porcelaine -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 9:21:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow I was just talking to someone on Yahoo, who told me a frank goodbye because he believed I wasn't acting submissive enough to be 'real'. I never thought that acting like a normal person meant I was a fakey McFake-Fake :/ Maybe you stumbled upon Miss Cleo's long lost sibling. The idea that anyone can ascertain someone's submissiveness through pixels is stupefyingly funny. But it makes a lot of little people feel good to suggest it. And some 'practitioners' are looking for fictional recreations and dismiss anything outside of that. [;)] ~porcelaine

crazyml -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 10:11:51 AM)
Ello Glasgow, The short answer for me is - Hell, fucking no! I would be extremely bored if a sub acted in a submissive way 24/7. But, I imagine there are some D-types for whom 24/7 submissiveness is essential (and some S-types who would love to be in that kind of relationship).

leadership527 -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 10:18:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow I was just talking to someone on Yahoo, who told me a frank goodbye because he believed I wasn't acting submissive enough to be 'real'. I never thought that acting like a normal person meant I was a fakey McFake-Fake :/ I don't expect someone to "act" anything. I expect the people in my life to be their authentic selves and then I decide whether I like that or not. Insofar as Carol responds to the whole world submissively so yes, I expect her to react in submissive ways to most things.

porcelaine -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 10:47:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 I wish everyone would remember that when a man says you are not "real" it simply means you are either not what he is looking for, you are not acting as he expects or desires or you have rejected him. Or he could simply be an adult and thank you for your time and wish you well in your pursuits. It's a put down. Nothing more or less. And I couldn't care why he does it, other options exist. ~porcelaine

texangael -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 12:00:33 PM)
quote: I was just talking to someone on Yahoo, who told me a frank goodbye because he believed I wasn't acting submissive enough to be 'real'. I never thought that acting like a normal person meant I was a fakey McFake-Fake :/ If one submits to me she submits 24/7. Of course, this also means she submits 0/0 to others.

aldompdx -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 12:07:26 PM)
In this context, I expect a person to be true to themself -- not to act, role play, and merely pretend. It is quite another thing if we happen to not resonate.

Twoshoes -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 12:12:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 Being submissive all the time is alot of work for the dominant. Got better things to do...

sexyred1 -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 12:29:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: porcelaine quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 I wish everyone would remember that when a man says you are not "real" it simply means you are either not what he is looking for, you are not acting as he expects or desires or you have rejected him. Or he could simply be an adult and thank you for your time and wish you well in your pursuits. It's a put down. Nothing more or less. And I couldn't care why he does it, other options exist. ~porcelaine I agree wholeheartedly, but find it is too much to expect adult behavior from most.

porcelaine -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 1:28:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 I agree wholeheartedly, but find it is too much to expect adult behavior from most. While this is true one can't condone the tomfoolery. People that behave like that are simply not up to par with those that want to relate with an adult. [;)] ~porcelaine

Chrisincuffs -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 2:12:21 PM)
quote: If one submits to me she submits 24/7. Of course, this also means she submits 0/0 to others. I agree with texangael on that. Also, if i submit to someone it is someone that I know and trust and if they aren't going to take the time to earn that from me than they can fuck off. Bottom line if they aren't being to be what I want in a D, then why would I want to be ANYTHING they want in a sub?

Undying90 -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 2:35:54 PM)
So i just had one of these 'always sub' experiences with someone from the site. they messaged me and we started talking about BDSM, she requested a pic of me and i felt that i needed to see one of her as proof she is who she claims(no profile pic). Well apparently, according to her im a sub and do not have the right to say what i need. This i completely disagree with. until i am owned i don't think i HAVE to act any certain way. and even once i am owned i do not act in sub character all the time, ive held long friendly conversations with my Mistresses in the past.

Chrisincuffs -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 2:39:12 PM)
quote: So i just had one of these 'always sub' experiences with someone from the site. they messaged me and we started talking about BDSM, she requested a pic of me and i felt that i needed to see one of her as proof she is who she claims(no profile pic). Well apparently, according to her im a sub and do not have the right to say what i need. This i completely disagree with. until i am owned i don't think i HAVE to act any certain way. and even once i am owned i do not act in sub character all the time, ive held long friendly conversations with my Mistresses in the past. That's too bad, I'd ignore anybody like that I guess.

Undying90 -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 2:39:53 PM)
the way i see it, if i have to prove i am who i am, its only safe and smart that they do the same. i have been doing BDSM long enough to know that much.

interlocutor -> RE: Do you expect subs to act submissive 24/7? (8/3/2010 2:56:33 PM)
I see submissive and dominant as orientations. Not quite sexual orientation but very similar to gay or straight. So a simple test that can gauge the 'validity' of a statement or the thought behind it is a simple word substitution. Substitute 'gay' for 'submissive.' "he believed I wasn't acting gay enough to be 'real'." Can one act "gay" enough to be gay? This illustrates the absurdity of judging some ones orientation based on what they type in a chat box.

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