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RE: Talking about kink, Is it so bad a thing to do? - 4/19/2006 6:15:24 AM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline
I know that Female Dominants are far from the only ones to get apparent wankers (I say apparent because some of them are just honestly clueless and pointing out that presenting something like that isn't the way to do things with us, they appologise and get much better).  My favorites are honestly the Male 'Dominants' who message us to "discuss techniques" or who have their own fantisies of being a bottom that they want us to help them live out.

TeeGO - I certainly hope that if you are currently looking, that you find someone who deserves you soon.  You have a sense of humor (even if I have missed that you were joking a time or two ...), you have the capacity for deep thought, and a desire for understanding.  Those things are rare and precious, especially in combination.  I'm sure that you have other fabulous qualites, but only knowing what I do of you online, I can't vouch for them. 

(in reply to feastie)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Talking about kink, Is it so bad a thing to do? - 4/19/2006 6:34:42 AM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetDommes
TeeGO - I certainly hope that if you are currently looking, that you find someone who deserves you soon.  You have a sense of humor (even if I have missed that you were joking a time or two ...), you have the capacity for deep thought, and a desire for understanding.  Those things are rare and precious, especially in combination.  I'm sure that you have other fabulous qualites, but only knowing what I do of you online, I can't vouch for them. 


  If you only knew how red my face can get. 

Thank you so much for the kind words.  You just made my morning.

(in reply to SweetDommes)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Talking about kink, Is it so bad a thing to do? - 4/19/2006 7:17:45 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TeeGO

Greetings Dominant Ladies

Once again I'm asking a couple questions that hopefully the answers will be enlightening to us subs. I know there are some of you that are not into kink at all. These questions are addressed to those ladies that are into the kink.

What is so bad, or wrong with subs bringing up the topic of kink?

And

Honestly, is there anything about the kink that you enjoy? (If so, can you explain it without providing wanking material as that is the last thing I want from this post.)


I'm a little confused.

Isn't this entire website basically about "kink" at some level?

I'm not clear at all how the word "kink" is being used... everything on this site with perhaps the exception of male dom/fem sub is kinky compared to the vanilla world (even that shouldn't be discussed, just done/accepted/expecteed, so it is kinky too).

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to TeeGO)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Talking about kink, Is it so bad a thing to do? - 4/19/2006 9:01:32 AM   
Proprietrix


Posts: 756
Joined: 7/15/2005
From: Ohio/West Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TeeGO
What is so bad, or wrong with subs bringing up the topic of kink?
And
Honestly, is there anything about the kink that you enjoy?  (If so, can you explain it without providing wanking material as that is the last thing I want from this post.) 


Hiyas TeeGO. (Miss seeing your face next to your posts.)

First, I have to clarify that I'm well aware that I'm a minority here when it comes to sex. In fact, I have yet to meet another asexual on this site. With that being said, I realize that I in no way represent any considerable percentage of the Dommes. But I'm always for throwing in my .02, lol.

I guess I'd first have to define "kink". I'm into a lot of "weird" things, that generally fall under the BDSM umbrella,  (i.e. flogging, caning, punching, kicking, (and various other 'cause someone pain' activities), bloodplay, needles, body mod, scarification, cutting, and on and on and on.....)
but those activities are not sexual for me.
So, being that they don't sexually arouse me, are they kinks?

I *already* don't have any desire to hear about sex. I accept a certain level of it because I'm here. I understand that many (most?) people here have a typical sex drive, and that some people here have an increased libido. That's just par for the course in any BDSM setting. If I couldn't handle that, I wouldn't be here. So, yes, I do expect to hear a certain amount about sexuality.

What I find offensive (and finally getting to the point of your question), is submissives who jump onto the forums, and within their first 5 posts, they either want graphic details about our sexuality, or they express their own graphic details about their fantasies, or they blatantly show that they have no intention of carrying on any type of conversation that remotely relates to anything outside the bed sheets.
To me personally, that is as disgusting as sitting down on the city bus and having the total stranger next to me say "I like eating pussy. Do you like having yours eaten?" It's vile. It's inappropriate. It's disrespectful. It's creepy. And in some cases, it's sexual harassment. (It's also many more adjectives that I could list.) I even find that kind of comments from strangers offensive at play parties or dungeons. It comes across the exact same way here. Hell, I get *more* of that here than I would get down the street at my local bar.

If I'm sitting here on collarme discussing the dynamics of slavery, how religion can be related to service, and the proper medical care for a heart attack during a scene, the last thing I want is some jerk-a-lot waltzing in here asking me about the size of my labia.

Some of the women here have commented that they want a submissive to get to know them, find out about vanilla interests, etc... before going into discussions about kink. I don't even necessarily see it that way. I see it more of someone just having a decent sense of decorum. I don't expect a submissive to come in here and personally get to know each and every Dominant on a personal level. But I do expect that someone has a grip on basic social conduct. I can think of very few settings where it is appropriate and acceptable to walk into a group of strangers and ask them about how they anally penetrate their partner. That's not even a matter of neglecting to get to know someone on a friendly level, that's just plain being a complete social derelict.

I guess for me it's not even the fact that sex, sexuality, or kink was brought up. If that were the case (as it often is), I just skip over those threads and move on to something that piques my interest.
What's offensive to me is the retardation in social skills.

(in reply to TeeGO)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Talking about kink, Is it so bad a thing to do? - 4/20/2006 2:28:48 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
TeeGO, I have to say that I wholeheartedly second what SweetDommes said. I love your humour and when you are serious I can tell that you are honestly trying to get an answer to a question without any ulterior motive. The woman that finds her way to you, will be a lucky woman I think.
LT  

(in reply to Proprietrix)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Talking about kink, Is it so bad a thing to do? - 4/20/2006 2:37:34 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
I have no problems talking about my kink 'if' it's with someone whom I actually plan on engaging in that kink with and not some anonymous cyber screenname whose wife is asleep and he wants to type with one hand. I can't imagine a reason in the world why my activites should be of interest to anyone who doesn't engage in those activities with me. First and foremost, it seems to me that it's a spoiler ... like someone telling you the end of a movie you've been dying to see. It would just tick me off. I don't mind the question.. "Do you like bondage?" What bothers me are questions like.. "Do you like bondage? How do you do it? What would you do to me if you had me all tied up and I couldn't move?"

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 26
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