Focus50
Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Twoshoes
Heh, sorry for the headache. You're right, that statement was directed vaguely towards your explanation, while also questioning the premise of this entire thread: that subs would act like subs, and doms like doms in public.
I'm sure some subs would be the ones ordering me around...  .
I was just wondering if this would work with people who don't have an "aura of dominance" normally.I'm the type of person who has to get people to like him first, before I am at all capable of influencing them to do something. I can do interesting, inspiring, serious, staring out a window, fun... all sorts of things, but not "I'm in charge".
(Not impossible, but tiring to emulate.) My leadership style is (allegedly) "inspirational". So usually, I can't be bothered to lead anyone, unless I'm on a terribly failing sports team or Canada gets invaded by another bunch of green aliens.
So I really don't see what anyone could possibly pick up on anything D/s-related by just talking to me. Although, maybe just out of the eye contact...
Hopefully, that makes my question clearer (bolded part).
An "aura of dominance" is not about posturing or deliberately trying to project something a potential sub might relate to. It's more about a Dominant just being his natural self and that's usually enough for subs to pick up on. We don't always know what it is that attracts us to one particular person over many, we just instinctively know what we like when we see it. One fem/sub said to me that she could tell I was a Dom just from my general aloofness in everyday situations. Of course, it helped that she knew me as a Dom anyway....
I don't test for a potential sub by crowding her or generally being bossy or overbearing etc. I do look for eyes.... I don't specifically know what it is but every sub I've known real life has mesmerisingly wonderful eyes. And they've all said the same about my Dom equivalents. So I tend to look for eyes when I'm out and about.
As I stated in a recent thread, I saw just such a wonderful set of sub eyes (IMO) when I watched the movie, "Meet Joe Black". Anthony Hopkins' youngest daughter and Brad Pitt's love interest (played by Claire Forlani) has eyes, body language and general persona that I'd just about sell my soul to own as my girl. And being a movie, obviously she's not reacting to anything my Dom eyes might project to the average sub.... Is Claire Forlani a r/l submissive? I dunno but I'd wager the house and car keys that she is, even if she hasn't found the lifestyle herself.
All species recognise their own. I'd include all the sub-groups of human sexuality in that. Everyone has specific traits and foibles that attracts the attention of their own kind, even when they're not meaning to. And of course there's all that potential to completely misread someone with it. No system is perfect....
Focus.
_____________________________
Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>
Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)
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RE: Sub Radar - 
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