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Quick & Dirty Kink 101 - Suggestions? - 8/28/2010 2:44:16 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


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I've been asked to give a presentation at a fetish event in October. The topic is a brief overview of WIITWD before the demos begin. I'll be giving a short "Kink 101" lecture followed by some Q&A.

The goal:

Cram a widely varied lifestyle into 30 minutes.

What I need:

The major points you think I should cover.
Some short "sound bites" relating to those topics.

Please understand, I'm not being lazy or asking anyone to do my work for me. I already have some ideas for what to include, such as short definitions of common terms, safety, a reading list for more info, and so on. I just want to make sure I'm not forgetting anything, and having input from multiple viewpoints helps my own creativity, especially when there are so many wonderful, experienced people here.

Plus, my forte is thorough, if loquacious, explanations. I'm less skilled at coming up with short, pithy nuggets of information. So, I could use some help in that area. Constructive suggestions are welcome and very appreciated. Thank you for your time.


_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor
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RE: Quick & Dirty Kink 101 - Suggestions? - 8/28/2010 3:07:15 PM   
LadyPact


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They gave you a whole thirty minutes, huh?  You've got your job cut out for you.

I'd probably break it down to fifteen minutes on your oratory, five minutes covering your hand-out on resources (recommended reading and groups to learn more in your area), and ten for the Q&A.

During the first part, I might cover quick basics.  Throw in the general bit about different ways of exploring kink (power dynamics and the garden variety top and bottom category).  Explain that rules in authority dynamics are different than folks would expect in what they may have exposed to prior.  I would touch just a bit on protocol, as many people do increase their protocol during events.  (Even folks who are laid back at home tend to go to a higher protocol during organized events.)  This will also help to set the tone for your presenters that they are in control.

I'd also set Myself up with some FAQ if there isn't much response during the question period.  People will just be getting warmed up and may not be ready to jump into participation at the very beginning.  You can use this to your advantage to lead into how the presenters will WANT to hear questions if they have allotted time for that.  Start energizing the audience during this period that the upcoming classes are new and exciting!

I hope that helps.


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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Quick & Dirty Kink 101 - Suggestions? - 8/28/2010 3:21:42 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


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Oh, sorry...let me clarify. Each presentation is going to be 45 - 60 minutes. I've got 30 minutes of lecture time and 15 of Q&A. I'm shooting for shorter so if I need more time, then I have it, rather than plan a 60 minute presentation and then be rushed.

Ref. groups in the area - got it. Good idea, thank you. There aren't many groups in the area where the event is being held, but there are several within an hour or two drive time. Do you think a hand-out sheet would work? This is being held at the local alternative lifestyles bar, so I have no idea how many people will be there.

Protocol - I'm very laissez-faire about protocol, even during events. I have some reference material on Leather protocol, such as Master Fire's book, but is there anything specific you'd suggest?

Thank you so much for your input. This is the first time I'll be presenting at an event of this size, so your suggestions are very helpful.


_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

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RE: Quick & Dirty Kink 101 - Suggestions? - 8/28/2010 3:51:34 PM   
LadyPact


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I do handouts for everything.  LOL.  Just make sure you clear up your extra copies if you are in that kind of venue.  It's better to have too many and have some left over, rather than not enough. 

On the surrounding groups, I absolutely would.  The fact that they are scarce where you will be makes Me say so even more. 

On leather protocol, I happen to be a fan of Robert Rubel.  I'd put a few other books on the list as well, so it's not centered on the higher side.  Counter that by including references to "The New Topping Book" and "The New Bottoming Book".  From what I'm getting, you're aiming to cover the wide variety of ways that people engage of all of this, so I wouldn't make it lopsided.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)
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RE: Quick & Dirty Kink 101 - Suggestions? - 8/28/2010 5:18:58 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


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Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline
I've got Rubel's Protocols for the female slave and it's good, but I found Master Fire's book more helpful. I think it's just that her style is more compatible with my own lifestyle preferences. I also enjoy her voice as a writer.

I'll definitely work on putting together a list of groups and their websites, and have my friends who are helping organize this shindig find out how many people the club owner anticipates will attend the presentations so I'll know how many copies to make.

Thanks again for your help.


_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: Quick & Dirty Kink 101 - Suggestions? - 8/28/2010 5:38:33 PM   
Twoshoes


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

Plus, my forte is thorough, if loquacious, explanations. I'm less skilled at coming up with short, pithy nuggets of information. So, I could use some help in that area. Constructive suggestions are welcome and very appreciated.


My first trick is repeatedly editing anything written until it is thoroughly distilled. (Handouts, references, speeches, etc.)

If you are like me and prefer to not write down your speeches, I recommend creating a skeleton with "anchors" for structure and topics/examples/jokes that you'd like to weave into your presentation. This way you can't veer too far off course, can keep track of the time and can remember everything crucial when improvising.

Mostly, I remind myself to not distract my own audience from the most crucial points by offering them anything more.

I have to admit, letting go of tangential ideas is a minor source of personal heartache, so I can definately relate to you. Thankfully, there are other types of expression that are better suited towards a detailed approach.

< Message edited by Twoshoes -- 8/28/2010 5:39:30 PM >

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RE: Quick & Dirty Kink 101 - Suggestions? - 8/28/2010 6:31:25 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Twoshoes
I have to admit, letting go of tangential ideas is a minor source of personal heartache, so I can definately relate to you.


This.

Ever hear the phrase "kill your darlings"? It's something every writer has to learn to do but it just kills. I hate it, hence the reason I ask others for input so I can make sure I've murdered them all.

A lot of what I'm going to be discussing will also be demonstrated visually at the same time. My girlfriend, who is one of the people helping organize, is going to serve me a cup of water on her knees during the presentation. Then I'm going to reference it and use it as a tie-in to what I'm discussing. We're also considering finding someone to act as a table or footstool. Sometimes it's the visual things that create the most impact.


_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to Twoshoes)
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RE: Quick & Dirty Kink 101 - Suggestions? - 8/28/2010 7:18:45 PM   
Twoshoes


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Joined: 7/27/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan
What I need:

The major points you think I should cover.


I can think of the following things I'd like to have heard a year or two ago:

- The variety of bdsm relationships is significant and there is no 'formula'.
- Top/Bot vs Dom/Sub vs Mast/Slave (24/7 vs relationship vs bedroom-only)
- Switches
- "Scene"-ing / safety
- Difference between Fetishes / Control / Leadership (I've found you can be interested in any of those independantly).
- What the best venue to learn skills like caning/suspension/shibari might be.
- The value of a "mentor"
- Bdsm people are REAL people with jobs, cars, kids (and not crazy).

Also, I'd open with a sentence or two about how you might have started out and your years of experience (so your audience can relate to you).

Cheers!

< Message edited by Twoshoes -- 8/28/2010 7:24:31 PM >

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