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MattyP -> RE: Collars and how fast they are given (9/26/2004 3:59:28 AM)
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MrThorns really hit on it for myself, and I shall endeavor to try to explain my reasoning.
I'm sure I'm not the only person who has done this, but I was in adult chat rooms about three or four years before I officially became an adult. I would go into teenager chat rooms and see "ur", "i", "l33t" and other things like that and I would feel just somewhat disgusted. If you ever get to meet me in real life, you'll find that I can be pretty juvenile, but that is mostly for the chance to make friends laugh, and I am actually fairly serious about quite a few things. And so I found my way to get past the bans (which I'll keep to myself to halt such miscreant behavior) and went into the adult rooms.
I'll freely admit that I largely went in there to see all the naughty profiles and cybering and what not. But now, looking back upon it, I would not change what I did, and only because of what I found in some of the Adult sections of Yahoo; the discovery was, of course, BDSM.
At first I simply haunted the rooms and watched, trying to learn it. And then, since I like to help people, I entered the online scene as a submissive. It didn't take me very long, however, to realize that, although I have a very keen interest in making others happy, I found myself more often than not trying to top my Dommes. So, long story short, I eventually found my way to being a Dom.
Now when I did this, D/s was pretty much kept to a few rooms, and the rooms I frequented (usually furry/anthro roleplay rooms) where almost empty of any Dom/mes or subs.
To address the issue more directly than I have been up to this point, at such an early beginning, I used D/s to score myself some easy cyber from people who were looking for the same thing. I became the king of "velcro collars", and when I could manage it, I had a harem of furre slaves/submissives.
I'm not sure when it was, but at some point, I eventually found myself wanting this to be real, and began to look outside the internet for satisfaction. Unfortunately, I come from Montana, and you will find pretty much no D/s scene to speak of (which is depressing, since it is the fourth largest state in the US). So I was forced to keep my interest based online. And I got to watch.
As was addressed, the D/s population, for whatever reason, exploded online, and instead of being the unique and curious Dom, I was simply one of many, and with the experience I did had, I got to see my early self in others, and so I have learned quite a bit.
Coming to Washington is my chance to finally open myself up to the lifestyle that I have been hoping for for a long time, but for now, online has been all I have ever known. And it is so for lots others. MrThorns hit it right on when he labled chat room roleplay to be a major cause of this aberration. Online, you're probably looking more for a quick cyber than anything else, and you grow to learn that a collar is simply a tag, something that says, "Steady cyber partner", and nothing more. And when these people finally find that D/s scene in the real world, the assume it is the same thing. "There's a sexy thing there. I'm going to tag her fun!" The collar is no longer a symbol of a bond, but simply a symbol of identifying, which is easily transferred. What a tragedy.
Please forgive this long post. I tend to enjoy the sight of my own writing a bit too much, and I prattle on. I realize that I am one of those people I have just spoken of, one who has only learned what they know from online flings, but I can at least identify the problem, and I hope that this post, and this thread as a whole, might be able to help anyone else who shares my position.
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