potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub, any suggeations?

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potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub, any... - 9/9/2010 2:36:17 PM

SecretTemptation

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i am a switch who has been mostly sub, so if you are reading this Sir , good evening hope you are good, anyway , i am now exploring my dominant side and have found a sub who is really not that much into s&m more into bondage, what might a bondage oriented sub like? what pleasure have any of you ladies got from such a creature?

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/9/2010 2:39:27 PM

poise

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Perhaps your Sir is reading this and can answer for you.....or you can ask him directly for assistance?

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/9/2010 2:41:25 PM

KyttynTheMynx

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Or, since you have found a bondage oriented sub, you can ask THEM what they like? Call me crazy, but it just...might....work.

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/9/2010 2:43:20 PM

SecretTemptation

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not this time , i want to do this for myself to find out what i like on my more dominant side , so he really could never help on that, maybe i should ask a bondage oriented sub

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/9/2010 2:48:32 PM

SecretTemptation

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quote:

ORIGINAL: KyttynTheMynx

Or, since you have found a bondage oriented sub, you can ask THEM what they like? Call me crazy, but it just...might....work.

well i did ask and so far tried out the one suggestion i got from him but if he is not sure what else he wants and is leaving it up to me to decide then i suppose i am looking for suggestions as to what others enjoy doing to such subs, maye i would like it too, think i should go back to being a sub as it seems like hard work otherwise

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/9/2010 3:07:54 PM

YetToLearn

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It depends on what THEY find pleasureable, really.

A good stock answer would be to tease them. It'll (hopefully) make them feel more helpless.
Of course, their is also a bit of light pain. but this is where you might need to talk to them more about limits and such.

Not sure if any of that is in any way accurate, but it makes sense to me! Good luck

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/9/2010 7:51:11 PM

LadyPact

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You may be very interested in reading "The Erotic Bondage Handbook" by Jay Wiseman. It is filled with various ties, positions, and information on bondage.

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/9/2010 8:04:19 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Also TwoKnottyBoys and Midori have great books on bondage.

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/9/2010 8:52:14 PM

Dnomyar

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I see that I have been missing out on some reading. I still like hands on experience.

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/10/2010 1:12:23 PM

SecretTemptation

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thanks for the suggestions , used to be in the girl guides so all that knot tying practise should come in handy , went investigating further and think i might have some fun seeing just how much he really likes it, when he is hog tied and at my mercy , yummy

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/10/2010 3:17:00 PM

Focus50

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From: Newcastle, Australia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SecretTemptation

i am a switch who has been mostly sub, so if you are reading this Sir , good evening hope you are good, anyway , i am now exploring my dominant side and have found a sub who is really not that much into s&m more into bondage, what might a bondage oriented sub like? what pleasure have any of you ladies got from such a creature?

Dunno if this'll rate as "insight" to you but (no offense, but if you've gotta ask why you're doing something....) bondage to me isn't really about restraints etc so much as asserting physical control over my girl.

So it can be practical such as holding her in place while I'm doing whatever I like to her or it can be a passive bondage scene where all I want from her is to take in how utterly helpless and dependent she is on me. And for the latter esp to happen (true physical control), the bondage has to be *real* with none of that "you're not sposta untie yourself" crap.

It's all about her being in the right head-space.... The first time I tie any sub up, I goad and berate her to release herself, even to the point of her bursting into tears for "failing" to get free. Only after I feel she's given it everything do I relent and get in her ear (and head) that:
a) She's done very well in trying her best.
b) If she had escaped, the failure would be mine for tying shoddy knots.
c) I look deep into her eyes and tell her to "let it go" (all that pent up emotion), relax and lay there until *I* decide to release her. That from here on, I'm the one who makes her choices and decisions for her etc.

Hopefully, this is where she drifts off happily into sub-space and I spend the next hour or two doing something similar as I take in her helplessness.

Like I said, if you hafta ask....

Focus.

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/10/2010 4:00:11 PM

SecretTemptation

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: SecretTemptation

i am a switch who has been mostly sub, so if you are reading this Sir , good evening hope you are good, anyway , i am now exploring my dominant side and have found a sub who is really not that much into s&m more into bondage, what might a bondage oriented sub like? what pleasure have any of you ladies got from such a creature?

Dunno if this'll rate as "insight" to you but (no offense, but if you've gotta ask why you're doing something....) bondage to me isn't really about restraints etc so much as asserting physical control over my girl.

So it can be practical such as holding her in place while I'm doing whatever I like to her or it can be a passive bondage scene where all I want from her is to take in how utterly helpless and dependent she is on me. And for the latter esp to happen (true physical control), the bondage has to be *real* with none of that "you're not sposta untie yourself" crap.

It's all about her being in the right head-space.... The first time I tie any sub up, I goad and berate her to release herself, even to the point of her bursting into tears for "failing" to get free. Only after I feel she's given it everything do I relent and get in her ear (and head) that:
a) She's done very well in trying her best.
b) If she had escaped, the failure would be mine for tying shoddy knots.
c) I look deep into her eyes and tell her to "let it go" (all that pent up emotion), relax and lay there until *I* decide to release her. That from here on, I'm the one who makes her choices and decisions for her etc.

Hopefully, this is where she drifts off happily into sub-space and I spend the next hour or two doing something similar as I take in her helplessness.

Like I said, if you hafta ask....

Focus.

thanks sweetie get where he is comming from now,as an aside ; love being in subspace, is there a domspace?? or am i just being too greedy

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/10/2010 10:13:40 PM

SthrnCom4t

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Yes, there is absolutely Top space. I believe there are several threads that can be found by searching the archives on said subject.

Re: original question

I would want to have more discussion with the person being bound, to find out what his/her goals are around the bondage session, and then see if they could be incorporated into meeting any of my needs. Otherwise it's a top service situation, and the fun is in creating pleasure for the submissive.

Since I'm not generally Top service-oriented, for me, the person in bondage would have to be suffering in some way...brought to the *edge*, so I could play with his/her vulnerability. Mental, physical, emotional....it doesn't really matter, as long as it's not somewhere they could get to by by themselves, and I got to experience their discomfort at my control.

Sadista - it says so in my profile.

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RE: potential pleasure of using a bondage oriented sub,... - 9/11/2010 3:13:24 AM

Focus50

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From: Newcastle, Australia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SecretTemptation

....love being in subspace, is there a domspace?? or am i just being too greedy

There is for Dom/mes.... The clue was here:

Focus:
"Hopefully, this is where she drifts off happily into sub-space and I spend the next hour or two doing something similar as I take in her helplessness."

Not sure how it works for switches.... I've heard it said they get the best of both worlds but that just doesn't hold water, IMO. IE, no one person gets "double" the average of another without some trade off.

And I see that in your OP; that wanting to explore your dom side doesn't amount to it being a natural act or process for you. As I've said, if you've gotta ask (how to dominate)....

Focus.

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