How are you?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

How are you?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> How are you?

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

How are you? - 4/22/2006 9:18:48 PM

murmur

Posts: 394
Joined: 9/26/2005
Status: offline

When you're meeting someone...whatever the context is in...the normal way to salute him is saying...hi, how are you?...but in that context...i just wanna know...
Do you *really* mean it when you ask it? Do you really wanna know how the other is? Or it's just another way to start the convo because...you just dont know how to do it? I just want people's opinions on that. (mostly, just for fun

)

Let's say, you know his mother just died or he lost his job...you know how he feels...why are you still asking it?? An habit?
Do you think that sometimes, *social sentences* should be..i dont know...avoided, cause of their...not stupidity but...annoying way to make themselves known?

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: How are you? - 4/22/2006 9:30:30 PM

knees2you

Posts: 2336
Joined: 3/15/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Let's say, you know his mother just died or he lost his job...you know how he feels...why are you still asking it?? An habit?
Do you think that sometimes, *social sentences* should be..i dont know...avoided, cause of their...not stupidity but...annoying way to make themselves known?

My friend a Transexual Dom just had a Grandma pass
away, So I am always asking if She is ok.

After awhile I would know She is over it.

Always, Ant

(in reply to murmur)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: How are you? - 4/22/2006 11:20:20 PM

Gauge

Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline

My theory is that if you ask something, mean what you ask. When I say, "Hi, how are you?" and someone tells me that they aren't doing so well, I always follow that up with asking why. It is a great way to get a conversation going but I guess it can become a trite habit.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to murmur)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: How are you? - 4/22/2006 11:23:49 PM

cuddleheart50

Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

If I ask someone how they are, I really mean it, whatever the context may be.

(in reply to Gauge)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: How are you? - 4/22/2006 11:28:18 PM

MasterMoody

Posts: 133
Joined: 4/19/2006
Status: offline

hi i say how are doing and i what to get to know you and i mean it. it is the only way you are ever going to find out about some one is to just ask it.

(in reply to cuddleheart50)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: How are you? - 4/23/2006 12:45:07 AM

Vancouver_cinful

Posts: 1911
Joined: 2/3/2004
Status: offline

I read a psychology paper once that said when people are asked that questions they assume that it's just a polite salutation and will answer "Fine, and you?" about 90% of the time...

If, after a few moments of small talk, you ask them again, they are likely to change the answer slighty, and say something a little more revealing like "A bit tired, but ok..."

Now, here's the interesting part of this theory...Ask the the third time...and that's when they will actually reveal the details of what is going on, and how they really feel.

I've done this with people, over and over again, and oddly enough it appears to be a highly accurate description of how people respond.

I imagine it's culturally-based, but in North America, at least, it appears to have some validity.

Cin

_____________________________

Cin

quote:

My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to MasterMoody)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: How are you? - 4/23/2006 3:25:54 AM

Level

Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline

Working in a court, we ask those "How are you?" type questions alot, and sometimes get "not so good" or "I don't know yet" answers lol.... the worst, though, was two weeks ago, a woman walked in, I asked her how her day was going, and she answered "Not so well".... turns out the Judge had done the inquest on her son, and she was going through a very rough time. Geeeesh...... made me wish I could reel the words back in.

Level

(in reply to murmur)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: How are you? - 4/23/2006 5:10:32 AM

FullCircle

Posts: 5713
Joined: 11/24/2005
Status: offline

There is another problem in that some conversations are dominated by hellos, goodbyes and how are you today. I generally say “Hello nice to meet you.” They say “You too.” Then we can get on with life’s great discussions on politics, religion and the weather. Failing that biscuits are also another good topic in BDSM chatrooms for some reason. I did have a good conversation the other night which was a nice change.

_____________________________

∞ ﮒuקּƹɼ ƾɛϰưϫԼ Ƨωιϯϲћ.

(in reply to Level)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: How are you? - 4/23/2006 6:26:59 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

When I say it, I mean it. I want to know how the person is...because I like to think that they mean it too.

(in reply to FullCircle)

Profile

Post #: 9