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STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 5:58:31 AM   
Fanta55


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/14/2010
Status: offline 		Hi

I am a sub who has met a few doms off the Internet for play. The only thing is I have not let it go to sex because I'm scared of STD

is it wrong to ask a Dom to take an STD test even if I am still going to make him Still wear a condom.

they usually say to me they don't need to test if they wear a condom

Just wondered other opionion. Am I being silly

Sarah x
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 6:14:47 AM   
peppermint


Posts: 5170
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		Yes, in fact they should be wearing a condom.  Just because they tested clean 2 weeks ago doesn't mean they'd test clean today.   Some STD's take time before they show up on one of those tests.  Also, who knows how many other people that person has been with since the testing. 

If they guy doesn't like the fact that he has to wear a condom to protect you and him, then he's not the one for you.  When you've found that special person you want to be with long term, and you've been monogamous together for 6 months, then when you both test clean you can do without condoms. 

(in reply to Fanta55)
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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 6:18:21 AM   
SpiritedRadiance


Posts: 1341
Joined: 3/3/2010
Status: offline 		Also know that some stds can be transmitted with condoms so testing allows to prepare and screen some stds that can still be transferred.

_____________________________

"Theres nothing in life like the feeling of cool leather sliding over your skin, the tears that fill your eyes as you realize someone else thinks you deserve it even if you havent reached that conclusion yet"- Forever to remember 11/5/11

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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 6:24:18 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Fanta55

Hi

I am a sub who has met a few doms off the Internet for play. The only thing is I have not let it go to sex because I'm scared of STD

is it wrong to ask a Dom to take an STD test even if I am still going to make him Still wear a condom.

they usually say to me they don't need to test if they wear a condom

Just wondered other opionion. Am I being silly

Sarah x

No, it's not wrong. In fact, it's the mature and responsible thing to do.


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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 6:26:27 AM   
servantforuse


Posts: 6363
Joined: 3/8/2006
Status: offline 		If they told you they had the AIDS virus, but it would be safe because they wore a condom, would you have sex with them.??

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 6:28:05 AM   
Fanta55


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/14/2010
Status: offline 		Thank you / doms make me feel like im16 sometimes if I ask for an STD test . It's nice to know other subs are the sAme.

So he us asking me to drop my limits ie- have sex. So I will now asking for an STD test and still fuck with a condom

If he says no I shall sY bye. Is that right

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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 6:30:16 AM   
servantforuse


Posts: 6363
Joined: 3/8/2006
Status: offline 		You new the correct answer all along.

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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 6:30:36 AM   
Fanta55


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/14/2010
Status: offline 		No deff not. I've only been a practising sub 5 months and the first Dom I met gave me an enema. God knows why I let him now. But I worried for 1 month after that I caught something from it

Thanks for your help it'd nice to have advise from other subs

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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 6:35:43 AM   
SpiritedRadiance


Posts: 1341
Joined: 3/3/2010
Status: offline 		Fanta, Just because its D/s doesnt make it any different then a vanilla relationship or vanilla courtship.

YES kink is an aspect however honestly if you wouldnt do it for a plain old vanilla man dont do it just because the man slaps on a Dominant label.


_____________________________

"Theres nothing in life like the feeling of cool leather sliding over your skin, the tears that fill your eyes as you realize someone else thinks you deserve it even if you havent reached that conclusion yet"- Forever to remember 11/5/11

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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 7:10:10 AM   
peppermint


Posts: 5170
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		Fanta, you live in London where there are groups and munches happening.  There is no reason you have to meet guys on your own.  Meet them through the social network that is already in place in London.  Talk to the other submissives.  Learn from them.  

(in reply to Fanta55)
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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 7:14:25 AM   
Fanta55


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/14/2010
Status: offline 		Yes that's what I have got to think I suppose . Cause I'm new to d/s relationship I feel a bit unconfident.

One Dom told me I cdnt be a sub for making much demands lol

I will email him now and tell him to go and test.

Sarah

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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 7:22:40 AM   
Wolf2Bear


Posts: 3204
Joined: 9/6/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fanta55

Hi

I am a sub who has met a few doms off the Internet for play. The only thing is I have not let it go to sex because I'm scared of STD

is it wrong to ask a Dom to take an STD test even if I am still going to make him Still wear a condom.

they usually say to me they don't need to test if they wear a condom

Just wondered other opionion. Am I being silly

Sarah x

No, it's not wrong. In fact, it's the mature and responsible thing to do.



Exactly.


_____________________________

~Resident Sadist Approved~

Take the pain
Take the pleasure
I'm the master of both
Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul
I'm gonna work it 'til your totally blown

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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 7:24:08 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Would you be asking the same question if BDSM wasn't involved and you were calling these people your dates instead of Doms?

There's no reason to let common sense fly out the window just because it's kinky.


_____________________________

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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Fanta55)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 2:25:54 PM   
hausboy


Posts: 2360
Joined: 9/5/2010
Status: offline 		Fanta55:
I've said it a few times, but since you asked...I'll say it again.  (I work in the health field and we deal with STDs in addition to other nasty bugs)

Test results are WORTHLESS.  They only tell you the person's STD status at the time the test was taken.  He may have engaged in unsafe behavior since, and you're back to being in the dark.  Safer Sex (no sex is truly 100% safe as all prophylactic methods have failures) safer sex should be your standard practice, every time, every act.

When I began a monogamous relationship with my Domme, we both got tested as a baseline, every day of our years that we spent together, we were always safe.  Latex condoms with water base lube for dildoes/anal toys, medical grade vinyl or nitrile gloves and water base lube for fisting, piercing etc. . We both became conditioned like Pavlov's dog to hearing that glove snap.

 

(in reply to Fanta55)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 3:31:32 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		Ummm this is not meant to be harsh, but unless you begin to use your head and some common sense, an std will be the least of your problems.
Forget the whole "I'm a mindless, submissive" crap and become responsible for yourself and your safety.


_____________________________



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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 3:57:03 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		Unscrupulous people will try to tell you all kinds of things. All you need to do , is just tell them "I disagree" and walk away from them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fanta55



One Dom told me I cdnt be a sub for making much demands lol



Sarah


_____________________________

One world under lube with vibrators and dildo's for all! quote from the sex toy 101 book

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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 9:00:24 PM   
almira


Posts: 19
Joined: 1/16/2010
Status: offline 		if a dom calls u demanding because u want to know something about him and want to be safe, hes just not worth ur time.

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/15/2010 11:36:48 PM   
Fanta55


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/14/2010
Status: offline 		Hi well that's what I'm doing I refuse to have sex with a condom or give oral with them taking an STD test.

Doms have told me that as long as a condom is used it safe

I just wanted to know if I was being over cautious asking everyone I play with to STD test I would never not use safe sex

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/16/2010 1:52:59 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Fanta55

Hi well that's what I'm doing I refuse to have sex with a condom or give oral with them taking an STD test.

Doms have told me that as long as a condom is used it safe

I just wanted to know if I was being over cautious asking everyone I play with to STD test I would never not use safe sex


Fanta55, I know of 3 people on the London scene with HIV. One has HIV and HEP C combined. There has been recent concern about how many people on the scene have STD's.
You only need to go to London clubs or any club for that matter, to see how carried away some people get. Its not only open sex thats the culprit but generally unsafe play as well.

What about you? have you been tested recently? could you have a spreadable disease? Does the Dom your playing with not want you to get tested too? If not, why not? If he's not asking you to get tested then he's not asked any woman he's been with to get tested. Do you think he would be that relaxed about it if he knew he was clean? Think about it. This could be a guy that's had bareback sex with half a dozen women who have also had bareback sex with half a dozen men each.

I'm a piercer. Its a waste of time for me to ask anyone I'm piercing if they have been tested because just about everyone will tell me they have. Do I believe them? Even if I did, I wouldn't risk not using every precaution I have to hand.

Having a test done in the UK is free. There is absolutely no excuse to not have a test. You need to go hand in hand to a clinic and be tested at the same time. You will both receive a text message with the results and the text message is done in a way that it can't be made up.
There are too many people wandering around with a 'rather not know' attitude. If they do go for a test and get a clear result then they are normally relieved and from then on make a resolution to be much more careful.


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S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

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RE: STD test/ medical papers - 9/16/2010 10:42:26 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		No its not silly at all it smart and safe. Condoms are a good start but ar not foolproof. The only way you can be 100% safe is if you BOTH get tested. If they balk at testing i would think they have something to hide. If he refuses ,you had the right answer just say see ya and walk away. As i always heard better safe than sorry.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 20
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