Now that I've caught the Buick.... (Full Version)

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Beatmehrdr -> Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/25/2006 1:01:44 AM)

I now can sympathize with the dog that finally caught the car he was chasing, and now doesn't know what to do with it(yes Josh, it does happen).  I've met a dominant Woman here via CM, and we've corresponded, and I'm meeting her this week for dinner.  Now, originally, I tried to schedule our date during the week, so that there would be no pressure about what we would do after dinner.  If there was no chemistry, or the chemistry was one way only, W/we'd both have to go to work the next day, so there would be an out if things didn't work out.  Now that W/we're meeting on a Friday,  I'm wondering if I should have another activity planned after dinner or not.   On the one hand, I'm trying to make a good first impression, and if she wants to see how good I am at entertaining, I want to be ready.  On the other hand, I don't want to create a situation where she feels under pressure, especially if she only wanted dinner.    Any ideas?



MsMacComb -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/25/2006 1:22:00 AM)

If it was me I would prefer a quiet meal in a place with great ambiance where I could talk in a comfortable manner with my new "friend". Somewhere with no kids, a bit of privacy between tables, soft "white noise" music and just a relaxed evening.
You may consider checking into a couple of entertaining events ( movie, concert, gallery opening, dancing etc, locations, scheduales etc) and just casually mention those as options if dinner goes well and you both feel energetic enough to go out. Be prepared with alternatives should she desire but don't plan anything for sure. She agreed to dinner and I assume nothing else was discussed. Don't make her feel pressured but do let her know that you thought enough of her and the date to have checked into a few things. Good luck. [:)]



Lordandmaster -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/25/2006 1:28:59 AM)

Isn't SHE the domme?  She'll do what she wants to do.



MistressOfGa -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/25/2006 5:30:44 AM)

quote:

Isn't SHE the domme? She'll do what she wants to do.


Only with his consent will she be able to do what she wants to do. Just because she is the Domina does not mean that she can automatically "do what she wants to do", in my opinion. This is a first meeting, it should be decided and agreed upon by both parties.



Proprietrix -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/25/2006 5:42:46 AM)

I doubt she would have a problem with frank honesty. If you simply ask her, she'll probably respond.
"Should I make any plans with my friends for after dinner or should I make myself available for you for the entire evening? I'm kind of new at this, so I don't mean any offense."
I can't see why she'd be upset about a statement like that.
Have fun and good luck!



GoddessDustyGold -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/25/2006 10:14:13 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

"Should I make any plans with my friends for after dinner or should I make myself available for you for the entire evening? I'm kind of new at this, so I don't mean any offense."


Excellent!  I always make it quite clear, at the time of the arrangement to meet, that dinner is dinner.  It's a chance to talk and spend time in each other's company with no pressure.
If this Domina has lead you to believe there might be something more, then Proprietrix's suggestion would certainly open the gates for further conversation and clarification. Or perhaps you both want to extend the evening in which case you should have a couple of vanilla back up plans as suggested by MsMacComb.
Have fun, be your respectful and gentlemanly self, practice your smile and your engaging conversation, and good luck!



Lordandmaster -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/25/2006 10:36:17 AM)

Thanks for the explanation.  (I wasn't aware that his consent was required; but now I am enlightened.)

I meant that he doesn't need to worry so much about what she's going to want to do.  She'll do what she wants to do.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressOfGa

quote:

Isn't SHE the domme? She'll do what she wants to do.


Only with his consent will she be able to do what she wants to do. Just because she is the Domina does not mean that she can automatically "do what she wants to do", in my opinion. This is a first meeting, it should be decided and agreed upon by both parties.



MistressOfGa -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/28/2006 1:13:58 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Thanks for the explanation.  (I wasn't aware that his consent was required; but now I am enlightened.)

I meant that he doesn't need to worry so much about what she's going to want to do.  She'll do what she wants to do.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressOfGa

quote:

Isn't SHE the domme? She'll do what she wants to do.


Only with his consent will she be able to do what she wants to do. Just because she is the Domina does not mean that she can automatically "do what she wants to do", in my opinion. This is a first meeting, it should be decided and agreed upon by both parties.




I knew what you meant and you're welcome.



ladiespet77 -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/28/2006 1:30:02 PM)

If it were me, i would Not be planning to go out with my freinds afterwards...lol....I mean comon man...even if dinner is All there is to the evening for me that sounds like a Great night out..Meeting a Domme,talking,having dinner,and seeing if You had Some of that chemistry.......Would You want her to Know You had plans afterwards and she was an apatizer to Your Real night out and the main course with You buddies...lol.....i dont know ......Have a backup plan for after dinner in case She does want to go out afterwards...if Not go home....



theRose4U -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/29/2006 4:49:34 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

I doubt she would have a problem with frank honesty. If you simply ask her, she'll probably respond.
"Should I make any plans with my friends for after dinner or should I make myself available for you for the entire evening? I'm kind of new at this, so I don't mean any offense."
I can't see why she'd be upset about a statement like that.
Have fun and good luck!


"Frank honesty" as you put it of that sort would have me telling him if he wants to be somewhere else so badly then I'd like to reconsider. I go for the play it by ear if you like one another knowing a jazz club or somewhere else to go that she might enjoy to go even if it's just for coffee is a good idea. But backing her into a corner before meeting you and asking what in my mind amounts to "so exactly how much time should I plan for you?" is grounds for finding yourself with an entire evening to kill by yourself.



BitaTruble -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/29/2006 5:28:22 PM)

For a first meeting, I like to avoid places where my attention is distracted. I don't like clubs, movies, galleries or anything else. I like conversation and communication.. that's why I'm there. I'm happy and content going to a little quiet coffee shop after dinner if I still want to be in someone's company. No fuss, no one to bother us, still public and you don't have to worry about a crappy movie on the big screen where basically, you're still two strangers who just happen to be sitting next to one another.

I would NOT ask her how much time to set aside for her though.. I would automatically set aside the whole evening, expect a few hours for dinner and consider any time after that a perk to getting to spend more time with her. If you find that dinner didn't go so well, you can always bow out afterwards and see your friends next weekend.

Celeste



TexasMaam -> RE: Now that I've caught the Buick.... (4/29/2006 9:28:58 PM)

Hope this isn't too late to help, since you posted 4/25 (wish I'd read this thread sooner).

All I can tell you is what worked for Me.  At our initial meeting, bobbi and I met strictly for 'a coke' to see whether we hit it off.

As it turned out, we were both immediately stricken by the 'omg I can't believe I met this INCREDIBLE, ATTRACTIVE person ONLINE for cryin' out loud! incredulous magic carpet ride, a carpet ride that's lasted nearly five years now!

We decided at our 'lunch/coke' date when we would get together next and we discussed a little of the activities that me might enjoy doing together. 

Our next meeting was so memorable!  The day was idyllic: a picnic in crisp fall weather at a nearby state park, followed by a nice drive and then a tour through a museum not far away.

I still remember every single moment of that day.  The choice of where we went and what we would do together were his.  He prepared the picnic basket, he chose the Museum, it was a complete and total treat.

Every time we've been together since then has been a total treat.

Don't push it before hand by asking if she wants you available for more than dinner, and don't insult her by making any reference to having other plans with someone else after dinner, for goodness sake!

Go to dinner and enjoy the meal, find out whether you click. 

After dinner and some lengthy conversation, simply tell her you did not want to push for anything more involved on this first meeting, but wow now that you met her you wish you had! 

Offer the rest of your evening to her, and if she has no suggestion, ask if she'd care to go browse a bookstore or a record store with you to select some small souvenir of your first meeting.

Good luck, beatmehrdr! Kudos for doing your homework, first!

TexasMaam



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