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the energy of people - 10/14/2010 2:37:09 AM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline 		.. and i dont mean do you bounce about like tigger - lol

i mean the energy that people give out, is it something you look for in a Dominant, that sort of energy in their personality that tells you youve met a person with Domnant energy to burn.

or is it something more along the lines of; you get on and that will develop as they get to know you.

i ask because yesterday at a munch in chatting to both sexes of the Dominant persuasion the one that exuded most energy and i found really compelling was a domme - her eye contact was so powerful, shes Domme to a male sub friend of mine and it really was just chatting casually, even so, the energy coming off her was amazing and it wasnt something she was actively doing, it was just how she was as a person.

the men were just gentle and really lovely but none of the same energy exuded - its a fun thing to feel, that energy, im not talking about getting off with people and so projecting themselves for that reason.  i just mean as an energy thing really.

i suppose i should ask on the Masters too, but i dont want to cross post - but is there a sort of reluctance to project that energy, do you feel it might be interpreted wrongly, is it something you use to flirt with, even if there is no actual decision to take it further at that point.

if that energy is there do you use it or do you feel you need to be more careful about how you project youreself and do you, subs enjoy that energy or do you find it a bit daunting.

and generally really, have other subs noticed this or was it just that the contrast was so apparent its made me question it today.  mind you having said that, at a club a few months back it was another Domme who also exuded this energy that has stayed in my memory over and above anyone elsse i met that evening.  is it a gender thing.

im not bi and thats not changing, but the energy that people project is a fascinating thing.  i know that up to a point i do project my submissiveness when with a Dominant that exudes this energy thing, i find myself responding automatically but subtley.  its a language that doesnt need words really, just a flowing of energy that you pick up or you dont.

btw im not making a comment either way on how people project themselves, but i do find myself wondering about this.

anyway, just a bit curious about it really.  x



_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!
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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 5:49:31 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		This is part of a journal I wrote back in April...

I often observed dominant men and their interactions. I felt nothing…no I lie, I felt there was no symmetry, no energy.

Occasionally at a club or private party I will see a particular dominant woman. There could have been dozens in the room but the rest were meaningless actresses with a flogger in hand or a goddess in latex having her feet worshiped but it was that one woman over the other side of the room that had my attention.
She was different. There was this energy flowing from her. No acting but just being herself. They say that it takes one to know one and I believe that’s true. Its like psychic people always seem to find each other. Im not psychic but I can see truth.

And truth is what I believe you were seeing in that dominant woman.




< Message edited by allthatjaz -- 10/14/2010 5:50:51 AM >

_____________________________

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Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to lally2)
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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 7:03:47 AM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

This is part of a journal I wrote back in April...

I often observed dominant men and their interactions. I felt nothing…no I lie, I felt there was no symmetry, no energy.

Occasionally at a club or private party I will see a particular dominant woman. There could have been dozens in the room but the rest were meaningless actresses with a flogger in hand or a goddess in latex having her feet worshiped but it was that one woman over the other side of the room that had my attention.
She was different. There was this energy flowing from her. No acting but just being herself. They say that it takes one to know one and I believe that’s true. Its like psychic people always seem to find each other. Im not psychic but I can see truth.

And truth is what I believe you were seeing in that dominant woman.





yes - youre right.  which is why im so curious about this. 

but i dont think the other Dominants were any less truthful about why they were there or who they felt they were in the scheme of things.  it was low key of course, in a pub with plenty of other people around who were not part of the munch.  and i did enjoy myself very much.

could it be that the fundamental difference is that there are players and there are Ds/ Ms people and a dominant player is a different animal to a dominant Ds or Ms person.

maybe what struck me most was the ratio -

not having been to a munch for ages id forgotten that the ratio of players v Ds Ms folk is much higher and the energy is different.

but then i got to thinking maybe male dominants feel they have to be a little more cautious in projecting themselves - ?

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to allthatjaz)
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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 7:54:58 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		I don't know lally but like you I do find myself homing into that special person that gives off an almost visible energy.
When you meet someone, anyone, here or in vanilla town, you find yourself warming towards certain people and I think those we do tend to warm towards are those who are ultimately comfortable in themselves. If they are comfortable with themselves then they exude confidence and that confidence comes over as a healthy energy and not something that could be mistaken for arrogance.

When you observe some dominants on the pull its obvious that they are not very confident and not very comfortable. That awkwardness imo is very unattractive. Others exaggerate their confidence and this macho image just seems a little pathetic. I'm not saying that any of these guys/women are not of a dominant nature but they haven't yet reached a stage of feeling ultimately comfortable in their domly shoes.

I have known a lot of lifestyles and scene people over the years but there are very few that I could point towards and say 'Wow feel that energy'. I can think of a few but they are a rare find.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to lally2)
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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 8:08:03 AM   
Ait


Posts: 30
Joined: 9/7/2010
Status: offline 		YES. I love people who just have that Dominant energy about them. I like to think of them as natural leaders who just project that natural confidence.I have noticed it more strongly in men, but I have gotten that vibe from women before. Actually, I find it hard to really see someone as a Dominant if they don't have that energy. I respect competence, and who know they're in control are obvious...as opposed to people who'd just like you to think they are.

I'm a naturally shy person and it can intimidate me enough to swallow my tongue but I still love it. My Owner has it and one of his former Slaves said it best, he comes off as a really big Dominant wolf, and the first reaction to him usually resembles warm, sticky goo.

-karen

(in reply to allthatjaz)
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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 8:21:13 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I don't find that people emanate Dominant vibes as much as confident vibes. I also think that vibes in general can be miscontrued.

Many times arrogant people are insecure, shy people are Dominant, loud people are submissive, people who are leaders in their work are followers in private, etc.

The type of energy I relate to these days is someone who radiates kindness, interest in others, reliability and follow through. If you judge people on how they project themselves in places like a munch for example, they may be far different than how they actually are.

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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 8:23:59 AM   
MistressLavinia


Posts: 1110
Joined: 3/6/2009
From: DFWM in the Land of LaviKinks
Status: offline 		I believe that if a Dominant, male or female is confident in themself, it radiates naturally. I have a very good sense of humor, some might take it as a weakness, but I can guarantee its not a weakness at all, it's a special quality, when I have to be serious it's there. I don't put on any airs about who I am or what I can do, I know what I am and what I can do. I'm a strong successful woman in my own right, without help from anyone. No man or woman has led me to where I am in my life. I made it on my own, my money, my home, my businesses. I work and live for me, but also give to others generously, again never mistake that for a weakness. When I'm fucked with, sometimes I'll let it pass, usually I correct it immediately and move on, but never forget, it's a mistake to fuck with me, and somehow, stupid people make them, and eventually learn to regret it.

Being a strong Dominant or even strong submissive, is a confidence you carry - No One can break you, except the love for your Master. The strong submissive is just that strong only for his/her Master. He or she cannot be broken from anyone, but will do whatever is necessary for their Master. Lally is absolutely to the point on target with all she wrote about, when you have it, it just flows.

Edit for grammar, Im quite the Livid Lavinia today~



< Message edited by MistressLavinia -- 10/14/2010 8:33:36 AM >

_____________________________

If somebody offers you a lifetime supply of candy and there is just one piece, don’t eat it: It’s probably poison:
~I am: ~Petal-icious~Bitch with Tits~
~ Ravager ~Sovereign~ LaviKinKs

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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 10:46:03 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		And subs can emit energy also. It's one of the things he most loves about play when it goes well, he gets to absorb/to feed upon all that energy I give off. Probably why I'm exhausted after and he's energized.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 11:22:55 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

And subs can emit energy also. It's one of the things he most loves about play when it goes well, he gets to absorb/to feed upon all that energy I give off. Probably why I'm exhausted after and he's energized.


I agree with this. Some subs give off a very powerful energy.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 11:46:07 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Yes they do. The last woman I was in a relationship with, drew people towards her like a magnet. It was fun to watch.

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to allthatjaz)
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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 12:20:45 PM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

I don't know lally but like you I do find myself homing into that special person that gives off an almost visible energy.
When you meet someone, anyone, here or in vanilla town, you find yourself warming towards certain people and I think those we do tend to warm towards are those who are ultimately comfortable in themselves. If they are comfortable with themselves then they exude confidence and that confidence comes over as a healthy energy and not something that could be mistaken for arrogance.

When you observe some dominants on the pull its obvious that they are not very confident and not very comfortable. That awkwardness imo is very unattractive. Others exaggerate their confidence and this macho image just seems a little pathetic. I'm not saying that any of these guys/women are not of a dominant nature but they haven't yet reached a stage of feeling ultimately comfortable in their domly shoes.

I have known a lot of lifestyles and scene people over the years but there are very few that I could point towards and say 'Wow feel that energy'. I can think of a few but they are a rare find.


the people at the munch were comfy in their skin, there were no egos or macho energies going on - i know what you mean though, ive certainly come across that.

its as you say i think, there are those in all walks who exude energy that is compelling and fascinating and then there are those who just gently and unobtrusively get there.

the confidence thing is curious to me -

and i think after meeting this Domme it has opened this question wide open for me.  if a Domme can be her own powerful self why not a Dom.  and yes, i think some subs do give off very powerful energy, so again, if subs and Dommes can give off this energy naturally why not Doms. 

im begining to wonder if ive been looking for the exuding energy from guys when in actual fact they just dont approach things that way.  they prefer the quietly determined approach - so the energy im exuding has often felt like its fallen flat on its face or ive had to suck it back in or its made me feel self concious all of a sudden.  like im being loud when i should be quiet.

hm! -


_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 12:58:05 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

i mean the energy that people give out, is it something you look for in a Dominant, that sort of energy in their personality that tells you youve met a person with Domnant energy to burn.

or is it something more along the lines of; you get on and that will develop as they get to know you.


Greetings lally,

I pay close attention to the energy mentioned to determine how it's presented and how it resonates with my own. Is it complimentary or are we having a tug-o-war. Because I engage in energy transfer it's important that we're in sync. I've found those that place too much emphasis on promoting a certain persona or are very wrapped up in the 'dominant culture' typically don't mesh well. In my opinion there's a difference in energy that exudes confidence and one that seeks to be front and center. I prefer someone with presence but I have some latitude on what that means. I find the contrasts of soft and hard to be very appealing.

quote:

im not bi and thats not changing, but the energy that people project is a fascinating thing.  i know that up to a point i do project my submissiveness when with a Dominant that exudes this energy thing, i find myself responding automatically but subtley.  its a language that doesnt need words really, just a flowing of energy that you pick up or you dont.


My current disposition is very servile but that isn't limited to dominant or submissive persons. I simply give of myself to those I encounter. I'm uncertain if associations are made or if they simply accept I'm a kindhearted person that enjoys helping others. When I'm in the presence of those that self identify as dominant my behavior remains the same. However, the specific energy that you're mentioning that would draw out a more surrendered response is typically limited to those that I have a share a connection with. It isn't something the would be stranger could generate.

Namaste,

~porcelaine

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His will; my fate.

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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 4:58:06 PM   
Inthewoods


Posts: 36
Joined: 4/5/2010
Status: offline 		Lally, I think I would agree that the strongest energy for me comes from the D/s lifestylers, and it is actually (for me) a calmness.  They have no need to prove their Dominant nature, they just *are* Dominant.  It melts me to goo.

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RE: the energy of people - 10/14/2010 10:03:17 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2
i mean the energy that people give out, is it something you look for in a Dominant

This would be the only kind of "dominance" (or "submission" for that matter) that I recognize. I've never had much interest in anything other than personal power. Positional power is just so tenuous.

Insofar as having a "reluctance to project that energy", typically not. There are, of course, situations where I work very hard to keep my sharp pointy teeth well hidden. But overall, that "energy" is really all I have. I damned well better be comfortable with projecting it. It is me.

And yes, as Des pointed out, submissive personalities broadcast queues just as dominant people do. Honestly, I don't think ver

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: the energy of people - 10/15/2010 4:28:04 AM   
AmericanParker


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/12/2010
Status: offline
sorry

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RE: the energy of people - 10/15/2010 7:39:59 PM   
SmartAssOrchid


Posts: 2
Joined: 10/15/2010
Status: offline 		Is it truly "dom" energy or "sub" energy, or more along the lines of resonance?

I think true "energy" is something that's exuded--not necessarily projected.   We project images; we exude what's internal.

I think that everyone puts out energy, it's just that not everyone's on the same wavelength.  Those whom you responded to hit that note that had you all aquiver, and, for whatever reason, you responded more to the Dommes than the Doms.  As someone who tends to overanalyze EVERYTHING, I'd just go with it. I've found that the people I  feel submissive to aren't necessarily who I'm sexually attracted to. 











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