What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm?

What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (Full Version)

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knees2you -> What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/25/2006 10:30:55 PM)
Hello, Another word for Beseeching is Begging. What Do You do in the Bdsm world When someone is Begging Your Attention? It can be an Uncollared Slave/Submissive/Switch or a Master/Mistress. I know that begging in some ways can be fun, but when does it go to far? quote: "It is not what You have in the End that matters. {cars, houses, money, etc} It is what You don't have!" Always, Ant[;)]

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 5:33:25 AM)
As usual, it depends on the situation. But if it's in person at least I'll acknowledge them and smile. Beyond that, I might remove myself from their area, tell them that they are coming on too strong, or find it amusing and keep talking with them and work through it.

petcerina -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 5:52:09 AM)
It goes too far when i hardly know the person and they are begging me to play with them or be with them when there has not been enough time. This goes for "Doms" as well as "subs and slaves". Being desperate is not attractive in the beginnings of a relationship. It makes me want to stop everything then and there and i usually do, especially if it is a "Dom" begging me. i think you can see why.

Tikkiee -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 5:58:18 AM)
quote: I know that begging in some ways can be fun, but when does it go to far? When it becomes inapproiate

twicehappy -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 5:58:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: knees2you What Do You do in the Bdsm world When someone is Begging Your Attention? Depends on the situation, if it is simply another human being needing a smile or a shoulder i tend to accomadate. I believe in cosmic karma. From a slave's view point though i find if it is a Dom i tend to politely say no. I prefer a Dom/Domme who is strong and secure, not one desperate for a sub/slave.

Reasonable -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 6:57:05 AM)
When they refuse to accept lack of interest, it becomes stalking.

crouchingtigress -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 7:08:36 AM)
Politely endure it and hope it goes away.....wait no, sorry that was my mother, poor thing she never really learned boundaries. I have learned that if something is bothering me, do a little self evaluation, figure out what the trigger is and why, and then address the root. If it a pushy person say, I would ask myself : What about me attracted this person to me, and not the person next to me? What signals am I putting out, how am I benefiting from this exchange? Is this what I want? That way I dont continue to attract the same type of people over and over again.

pissdoll -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 8:03:30 AM)
i find the begging is a little more common online than it is in the real world. however, once a dom has begged, there is no chance for a relationship. his/her begging has given me the upper hand, and in the back of my mind i will always know this. maybe that makes me far too rigid and unfair, but that's how my mind processes it.

Proprietrix -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 8:33:59 AM)
I've found that most beggars disappear quickly when I mention actually metting for a cup of coffee.

truesub4u -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 9:43:50 AM)
I find that when a Dom shows to be interrested.... and lets me know if all fine and dandy. Even when they become a little instant... to a point..... but after i've let it be known... i'm not interrested for what ever reason... and they still insist... that's when I get bored and sort of mad... that this "Dominant" is really nothing more in my eyes than a sub in sheeps clothing.

slaverosebeauty -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 9:53:10 AM)
Depends on the person. If I am interested I will make an effort to keep in contact, if not, I ask the to 'back off.' I won't beg for someone's attention, I either have it or I do not, no sence in wrapping my life around or putting a lot of effort into something if someone does not feel the same and puts effort into things. Returning emails, offline msgs, and phonecalls are part of that respect that we are suppose to have for eachother, even in the beginning. I will write someone off, I don't have tiem for games and players.

bandit25 -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 9:57:24 AM)
I agree. It's very uncomfortable for me to have a dom begging me for anything. Now, depending upon the person and the situation, I don't mind him asking, but begging? I run away...quickly.

LaTigresse -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 2:08:04 PM)
online begging tends to make me run..........fast

Saraheli -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 3:16:06 PM)
quote: What Do You do in the Bdsm world When someone is Begging Your Attention? Flog them soundly.

masterdeltafire -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 4:07:55 PM)
It depends on the situation and what all is involved. If it is begging to speak with me, I do not mind. If a girl is begging 5 minutes into a converstation for my collar and me to teach her, then i usually will tell her to slow down . If a girl wants sex after 5 min same thing, and if it progresses then she finds herself in a chastitybelt until she learns to control those urges. . Although not into males and never will be, one of the mistakes I saw them make all too often was begging to worship the Domme's jewels as soon as they knelt before her. Usually if the male wasn't slapped across the room, was rather surprised. If one begs constantly for my attention then yes, I see it as topping from the bottom and send her to the corner for a time out to think things through, and if it continues, then usually if quiet time, essays and telling her to be patient do not work, and later the paddle, then not much will. So she is released. Don't get me wrong, I love a girl begging at my feet and waiting on me hand and foot, but I do enjoy some time also to myself. Don't get me wrong, love sick puppy sndrome is cute, especially in puppy girls, but gets old quick if it is constant :)

ladylexington -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 5:16:23 PM)
When it is online, and I've hardly met the person, I beseech Collarme to block them.

amaidiamond -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 5:30:56 PM)
If it is a sub begging me, I ask them nicely not too, especially the male subs that insist on calling me Ma'am, feel like screaming I'm a submissive dammit! If it a Dom begging me, something in me goes ohhhh squick and I run away very fast. Actually, I just dislike people begging me in general

CreativeDominant -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 5:52:58 PM)
For me, it depends on the situation. It is one thing during a scene to have a submissive begging you to "please stop...something", "don't stop...something", "please give me...whatever" and another thing entirely to have someone begging me to pay attention to them during a time when I am busy. When it happens outside of a scene, I first tend to look at what the submissive is asking me for. If it is time for example, I look at my own behavior to make sure that I have not been a neglectful partner recently. If I haven't been, then I remind her of the time I have spent with her recently and make it clear that constant clinginess/neediness are not traits I find attractive. If I have been neglectful, then I either apologize and spend some time with her then or I give her a definite time within the next 24 hours when I can spend time with her. As another example, if she is emotionally vulnerable and in need of some comfort, and regular signals haven't worked with me (for whatever reason...distraction, work, etc.), then I try to do what she needs right then, if possible. If not possible, then I do so as soon as it is possible. If I suspect that the emotional situation has been contrived or find that the reason she is upset is just not all that valid as being able to cause "emotional upset", then at the very least a serious discussion is called for. This is the way I would handle these two situations but there are so many differing types of situations in which someone could be considered as doing "begging". I think a big part of it is each person's perception of the situation...we all bring our own biases and notions and past experience to each situation. I guess...and I know this will sound strange because it is coming off the top of my head and I don't have a lot of time right now to sit and put it better...I can handle "begging of an adult nature and of legitimate cause" but not "begging due to emotional immaturity, self-esteem issues, or from a need to get what they want rather than what they need." (hope this part makes sense).

TemptingNviceSub -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 6:32:40 PM)
If it is in the context of here on the internet then I would find it rather disconcerting coming from a Dominant.More than likely I would find it unattractive, needy, and insecure and extricate myself ASAP, but as gently as I possibly can, for I actually (shock!) hate to hurt someones feelings..be well..Tempting

MstrFury -> RE: What do You do about Beseeching people in Bdsm? (4/26/2006 7:42:20 PM)
peeking out to ask a simple question.....is there really a Dominant that begs? pulling my cape around me and stepping back into the shadows to lurk

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