RE: Age and honesty (Full Version)

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huntme -> RE: Age and honesty (4/26/2006 11:51:20 PM)

Age is very important to some people.  People here often ask for someone within a tight age guidelines, their requirement is often followed by a comment saying that they are shallow but why not have it all!  Personally I don't feel age is as much an issue until you reach 40 when it really becomes an issue for women.  But always I do respect a person's rights if age is something that is important to them.  More important to me however is the lie.  Once someone lies can you really ever trust them again?  There are no excuses that justify a lie, especially not something as trivial as age.  Actually to lie about age means you would lie about almost anything.  And to those who think women do not lie about age, get your head out of the sand and come back to the real world.  It happens, here more than anywhere elese.  I just wonder how can you expect honesty if you do not give it.  It really is a simple quesiton which no one seems to really want to answer. I did not think that it was a threatening question, yet it really seems to be.  




SoulfulSadism -> RE: Age and honesty (4/26/2006 11:59:31 PM)

The problem with being shallow is one *cannot* have it all. The intensity, depth, that searing connection will not, cannot be there. 




WickedTruth -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 12:00:40 AM)

I had no issues with age either before I was 40 or after turning 40. I'm 46, proud of what I've accomplished thus far and try to take care of myself. I think, perhaps, you are dealing with the wrong people and rather than asking strangers on a forum why people lie about their age, which none of us can truly speak to, perhaps question your own judgment and how you can make the same mistakes over and over again since all you seem to run in to are women who lie about their age.

Celeste




BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 12:02:28 AM)

If you READ my first reply and second actually, you'd notice we all agree that it is wrong to lie, and that hypocrisy is wrong; but why in the world are you ranting about it?  Just be glad you found out before a more serious concern came up.   I would be fairly content if the only thing men lied to me about was their age.  No I don't believe that lying about one's age also means one's hiding having a husband/wife and offspring for example.  There are different levels of offenses for different lies.  A picture of a brunette as a blonde is a lie, but you'd accept it.

Yes it is about vanity, but if you are the type to insist on all truth all the time, than dump her the minute you find she says you look okay, but actually thinks you look like you picked up your style tips from the homeless bum, lol... 
P.S I still can't believe I'm now 40, and certainly don't look it, but I think lying about it is stupid, and makes me look weak in the end.   M




meatcleaver -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 12:09:50 AM)

I've met several people who have lied about their age and it seemed rather trivial and amusing to me and when I brought it up there was slight embarrassment followed by a laugh at their expense. With one I ended up having the delicious enjoyment of having her bent over a bench and promising in between squeals, she will never lie about her age again. Later she said, if lying about her age was going to have her ending up in such a humiliating position begging for mercy, there was really no incentive to be honest. I'm certainly glad I never let something so trivial get between us.

The biggest liar I have known was on the face of it as honest and full of integrity as she claimed to be. I had bought right into her and there was no way of knowing she was at heart a moral coward, a hypocrite and a malicious trickster. She cost me dear, not just the slight irritation of being subject to little white lies, I mean she had a horrendous affect on my life and I didn't see it coming until it smacked me in the face very, very hard.

Sometimes people's flakiness just exposes a little lack of self confidence. Believe me, real liars aren't found out about until it's too late and they are the ones you really want to know about.




Arpig -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 12:13:20 AM)

Here's something for you to consider...WickedTruth and I are the same age.....and yet I look like I could be her father.....which one of us is lying.

quote:

Once someone lies can you really ever trust them again?  There are no excuses that justify a lie, especially not something as trivial as age.  Actually to lie about age means you would lie about almost anything.  And to those who think women do not lie about age, get your head out of the sand and come back to the real world.


Iread this as follows:
1. Once a person lies about anything they are by definition untrustworthy
2. Women lie about their age
3. therefore women are untrustworthy....if that's the case, why do you bother asking them anything....you can't trust them anyway....




Dom4me2 -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 12:14:06 AM)

quote:


ORIGINAL: huntme
I just wonder how can you expect honesty if you do not give it.  It really is a simple quesiton which no one seems to really want to answer. I did not think that it was a threatening question, yet it really seems to be.  


In my opinion you can not expect honesty if you can not give it.  If you believe that this woman or any one else has lied to you, then you decide if it is a deal breaker or not.

I don't believe that the question is threatening...you are just asking the wrong people.  Perhaps you need to direct this question to the one that you believe lied to you.  We have not lied to you about our age and you write as though every woman on here lies about her age.  THAT is what has been perceived as threatening.  Many people have offered many different reasons as to why your "pictures tell the truth" theory can be inaccurate, if not totally wrong.   Yet you are still on a tangent about people lying to you. 




bignipples2share -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 1:01:21 AM)

I'd be really surprised if anyone were to convince you that some people really aren't lying about their ages. Some people look older/younger than their physical age and that's a fact. If you think they're lying about their age and don't like it, why are you even responding to them. If they're admiting to you that they've lied to you about their age, again, why lie to them, just say you didn't appreciate their lying and move on.
I don't have the need to lie about my age, but I do wear make-up. Some men don't like women who wears make-up, they move on.

__________________________
ahhhh I see sounds 




MissyRane -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 2:47:09 AM)

I wouldn't even be able to guess the age of myself[&:] but some people really do age...FAST there's someone on here 35 years old, I always think they're 60 years old, n then there's another 21 years old, I always think they look 14 years old and it bugs the shit outta me[8D]




MasterC46910 -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 2:51:42 AM)

Why would you judge someones age from their photograph in the first place?  That seems to be the jest of the question.  Huntme is claiming she lied because of the photograph.  I have played around with cameras a lot in my time. You can make people look a whole lot different then they really are.  For one thing it is a two dimensional plane verses a three dimensional plane most of us see in.  Some of the best photography models in the world actually look very plain in real life.  The camera just sees them different.  You can do so much with a camera, both good and bad that it would be hard to judge anyones age or actually beauty from just a photograph. 

Did they lie?  If you can tell from a photograph, then you are very much more talented then people that do it for a living.  I also agree with most of the people that you can not really tell someones real age just from looks.  People just age different, I have seen mothers that look much younger then their daughters.  You can not tell by looks what someones age is.

Liing is a normal part of the human existence.  I would be more distrustful of the person that told me they never lie.  Some of the most deceitful people I ever met always claimed they never lied.




twicehappy -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 3:24:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: huntme

Oh and after taking a closer look at profile pictures, it appears that it is the majority, not the minority who are being dishonest here on collarme. 



I am with a few others here on this one. My Master And Mistress just did new profile photos and a friend of mine emailed to ask me why i had not told her my Master(ScooterTrash if you want to look for yourself) was so young, she guessed his age around mid thirties when he is actually 50 years young. A lot of it depends on the person, genetics, their habits, plus some people just photograph better than others.




tasha_tart -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 6:59:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ServiceNTucson

quote:

ORIGINAL: misfire

Did you see some form of valid ID that justified this rant?

I'm nearly 23, yet I'm told I look 16.  One of my best friend's mothers looks 60, but she's only 43.  Women do not always look their age, my friend.  So unless it's Barbara Bush claiming she's a young, nubile submissive ready to go, I'm gonna have to give these unknown ladies the benefit of the doubt and say ... they may not be lying after all.  



Barbara Bush IS young and nubile, although I don't know about submissive.  Oh wait, you're talking about the President's mother, not his daughter.


My laugh for the day...thank you!
 
Tasha




mistoferin -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 7:07:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: huntme

Personally I don't feel age is as much an issue until you reach 40 when it really becomes an issue for women. 


Crap....does this mean that I am nearly 4 years overdue on having an issue? Wish someone would have informed me so I could have gotten it over and done with....I really hate being late for anything.




MadamShy -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 7:10:07 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: huntme

Recently, I received an email from a Domme who insisted I be totally honest, yet her own profile pictures betrayed her!  Why do women feel compelled to lie about their age?  It is very easy to tell a woman's age by her pictures, don't women here know that?  While I will often be polite and allow someone to perpetrate this self deception, I do not feel compelled to then be honest with them in return. Oh, I have heard all the excuses, "she feels younger, she looks younger, she is more comfortable in the company of younger men, it is just a white lie, men lie too."   Yes, I have heard all the rationalizations, yet, isn't a lie still a lie no matter how you justify it?  Can you ever trust someone who lies to you and to themselves?  Perhpas someone can explain this to me since I am curious about this particularly destructive form of deceit.  Oh and after taking a closer look at profile pictures, it appears that it is the majority, not the minority who are being dishonest here on collarme.  I mean come on, someone who looks 60 trying to pass themselves off as 45, it has to be a joke right?    


I'm 46 .. and I don't think I look it ...

I have a friend .. she looks 60 and is 41....

I am proud that I take care of My skin ...

don't diss till you have the proof... you may regret that ... and Yes I love young men... I'm a dirty old lady and proud of it ...

I love young woman too ...

oh im such a delightful pervert LOL

ummm where is huntme's profile .. LOL ...
 
confucious sez
"one that bitch behind hidden doors normally has nothing to bitch about"




MasterFireMaam -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 7:10:21 AM)

Why do people lie about anything? It's either to cover something they feel is wrong or inadequate or to not hurt someone's feelings. Human behavior is still human behavior whether you're dealing with Ds or not.

I'm pretty interested in your claim to be able to tell ages by looking at pictures. So, here's a test. How old in Linda Carter in each of these pictures?
http://www.geocities.com/master_fire_maam/LindaCarterAgeTest.htm

Fire






Reasonable -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 7:11:51 AM)

Isn't vanity charming?[:D]




cloudboy -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 7:20:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: huntme

Recently, I received an email from a Domme who insisted I be totally honest, yet her own profile pictures betrayed her! Why do women feel compelled to lie about their age? It is very easy to tell a woman's age by her pictures, don't women here know that? While I will often be polite and allow someone to perpetrate this self deception, I do not feel compelled to then be honest with them in return. Oh, I have heard all the excuses, "she feels younger, she looks younger, she is more comfortable in the company of younger men, it is just a white lie, men lie too." Yes, I have heard all the rationalizations, yet, isn't a lie still a lie no matter how you justify it? Can you ever trust someone who lies to you and to themselves? Perhpas someone can explain this to me since I am curious about this particularly destructive form of deceit. Oh and after taking a closer look at profile pictures, it appears that it is the majority, not the minority who are being dishonest here on collarme. I mean come on, someone who looks 60 trying to pass themselves off as 45, it has to be a joke right?


If you don't know why women lie about their age, you don't know them and the society we live in very well. One thing I will say, there is nothing more satisfying than loving a woman for who she is, little insecurities and all.




Dustee -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 7:27:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SoulfulSadism

The problem with being shallow is one *cannot* have it all. The intensity, depth, that searing connection will not, cannot be there. 


Very true, but the shallow always believe they can have it all.




tasha_tart -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 7:29:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: huntme

Recently, I received an email from a Domme who insisted I be totally honest, yet her own profile pictures betrayed her!  Why do women feel compelled to lie about their age?  It is very easy to tell a woman's age by her pictures, don't women here know that? 

Hey...while you're at your psychic gig...can you give me Friday's lottery numbers?

While I will often be polite and allow someone to perpetrate this self deception, I do not feel compelled to then be honest with them in return.

Way to go...lie right back to them...that will show them how morally superior you are!

Oh, I have heard all the excuses, "she feels younger, she looks younger, she is more comfortable in the company of younger men, it is just a white lie, men lie too."   Yes, I have heard all the rationalizations, yet, isn't a lie still a lie no matter how you justify it?  Can you ever trust someone who lies to you and to themselves?  Perhpas someone can explain this to me since I am curious about this particularly destructive form of deceit. 

Do you walk up to total strangers who, in your infallible wisdom, are not attractive to you and tell them?  If not, you're lying by omission, and therefore can never be trusted on anything.

Oh and after taking a closer look at profile pictures, it appears that it is the majority, not the minority who are being dishonest here on collarme. 

I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of profiles are off by a year or two (mine was), since age requires manual updating, but that doesn't constitute dishonesty.

I mean come on, someone who looks 60 trying to pass themselves off as 45, it has to be a joke right?

No joke, IMO...some people are blessed enough to age slower physically than chronologically.
  



quote:

ORIGINAL: huntme

Age is very important to some people. 

To the point of obsession with you, it seems.

People here often ask for someone within a tight age guidelines, their requirement is often followed by a comment saying that they are shallow but why not have it all!  Personally I don't feel age is as much an issue until you reach 40 when it really becomes an issue for women. 

Age seems to be a huge issue for you....and what's with women and forty?  From my perspective forty is young, and reaching forty is preferable to the alternative.

But always I do respect a person's rights if age is something that is important to them.  More important to me however is the lie.  Once someone lies can you really ever trust them again?  There are no excuses that justify a lie, especially not something as trivial as age.  Actually to lie about age means you would lie about almost anything.

Can I assume that you have never lied since the day you were born?  Because if you have...then why should we believe a word of what you posted

And to those who think women do not lie about age, get your head out of the sand and come back to the real world.  It happens, here more than anywhere elese. 

Could you not put your amazing psychic powers to better use than guessing ages from a single photo?

I just wonder how can you expect honesty if you do not give it.  It really is a simple quesiton which no one seems to really want to answer. I did not think that it was a threatening question, yet it really seems to be.

It wasn't a threatening question...just a sexist, misogynist, ill-informed, insulting, and narrow-minded one.
 


A couple more points:
  • if you are such a shining beacon of honesty, and an expert on profiles, where is yours?
  • I am sure you would be a major catch for any Domme.  I'm willing to bet they'd just love the way you doubt every word they speak or write.

Tasha




cloudboy -> RE: Age and honesty (4/27/2006 7:33:38 AM)


This is just an aside to this thread.

In your profile you state,

>I recently married my life partner. We are fluid bonded and sexually monogamous. The relationship I have with him has no effect on any relationship I may have with anyone else. <

You are being rather naive to think that extra marital BDSM encounters will not affect your marital relationship or that your marital relationship will not affect your encounters. I understand you may want to make your boundaries clear, aka, that you intend to stay married, lover you husband, and reserve traditional sexual intimacy with him ---

but I think its a lie to call yourself "monogamous" or even "sexually monogamous." You are poly, seeking intimate encounters with more than one partner. If you want to have better more satisfying extra-marital encounters and if you want a fuller more complete/honest marriage, IMO you'd be wise to to pursue a deeper understanding of what poly is all about.




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