quote:

ORIGINAL: anniezz338

Are all the comedians on duty tonight? lol. Hell yea it's a gift and it's also a gift when a Dom accepts responsibility for that gift.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub



This never makes sense to me. If I give a child a puppy, I have a lot of expectations about how they will take care of it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

Well if it was a gift that was alive sure you'd have expectations, but a shirt, or a pen or a toy, anything inanimate, I wouldn't have expectations of what they'd do with it. Ok well I would, but once I give it to them, I loose all right to expect anything of them over the gift. And I certainly don't expect them to give me something back , because I gave something to them.  I don't loose any right to expect someone do the right or proper thing with my submission, and if I am submitting to them, damned strait I expect something in return.  so to me it's not a gift.  A gift, to me is freely given with no expectations of anything in return, and no expectations in how or when it's used.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub



This never makes sense to me. If I give a child a puppy, I have a lot of expectations about how they will take care of it.

quote:


: a notable capacity, talent, or endowment
2: something voluntarily transferred by one person to another without compensation
3: the act, right, or power of giving

quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

[image]http://i685.photobucket.com/albums/vv215/ice_0/purr.gif[/image]

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

Well if it was a gift that was alive sure you'd have expectations, but a shirt, or a pen or a toy, anything inanimate, I wouldn't have expectations of what they'd do with it. Ok well I would, but once I give it to them, I loose all right to expect anything of them over the gift. And I certainly don't expect them to give me something back , because I gave something to them.  I don't loose any right to expect someone do the right or proper thing with my submission, and if I am submitting to them, damned strait I expect something in return.  so to me it's not a gift.  A gift, to me is freely given with no expectations of anything in return, and no expectations in how or when it's used.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub



This never makes sense to me. If I give a child a puppy, I have a lot of expectations about how they will take care of it.

Last time I checked I'm alive. I'm giving me. Just like I expect the child to take care of the puppy, I expect Valyraen to take care of what I give him. And frankly, the idea that all gifts are given without expection is well... silly. When I'm given my grandmother's heirloom china, I'm expected to take care of it. I CAN destroy it because it's mine. But the expection is that I will take care of it.

I gave Valyraen a very expensive pocketwatch for our wedding. I do expect him to take care of it and not wear it out in the rain. If I couldn't I wouldn't have given it to him. He bought me a very nice wedding band. He expects me not to pawn it randomly. Now, I really don't give a crap what he does with the little duck I bought him at the gas store because it made me smile.

Not all gifts are equal and some do come with expectations. For that matter, there is nothing in the defination of gift that says it doesn't count if there aren't expections. Only that there can't be compensation, ie. he can't pay me for my submission.

quote:


: a notable capacity, talent, or endowment
2: something voluntarily transferred by one person to another without compensation
3: the act, right, or power of giving

 It's a romantic term. And it's not one that anyone is required to hold with. But I truly don't understand mocking something by laughing at it when it's a term that some people cherish. I do happen to see my submission as a gift, just as I see friendships as gifts, his presence in my life as a gift and my pets as gifts. They are things that I have to take care or I will lose them but they are still gifts to me. Nobody has to see it that way - I don't know why someone would mock my feeling that they are.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
But I truly don't understand mocking something by laughing at it when it's a term that some people cherish.  I don't know why someone would mock my feeling that they are.

Edited for typos >.<

I don't buy into that "submission is a gift" line. A gift is something you 
give with no expectation of anything in return, which is certainly not my definition 
of submission. Being submissive is my orientation, it's who I am.  Submitting to 
someone means accepting their leadership, seeking their guidance, digging deep 
into the dark places where the trust hides and letting it out, and above all, striving 
to please them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

To quote a wise and noble woman . . . wait, maybe she was a wanton slut or the Goddess of Sarcasm? Anyway, she sums up what you all have been saying by stating that being submissive is her orientation.

I don't buy into that "submission is a gift" line. A gift is something you 
give with no expectation of anything in return, which is certainly not my definition 
of submission. Being submissive is my orientation, it's who I am. Submitting to 
someone means accepting their leadership, seeking their guidance, digging deep 
into the dark places where the trust hides and letting it out, and above all, striving 
to please them.

quote:

My act of submitting to DB is a gift of sorts to Him. I have always said that.

I'm not a person who has any natural tendency to feel submissive, want to serve, hand over the reins, or any of that stuff... The fact that I'm doing with Him something that has never felt natural with anyone else, IS a gift... for both of us.

quote:

I do happen to see my submission as a gift, just as I see friendships as gifts, his presence in my life as a gift and my pets as gifts. They are things that I have to take care or I will lose them but they are still gifts to me

quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

I think it's just another way someone can feel like they've done somebody a great favor by gracing their lives.

I've yet to see anyone touting "my submission is a gift" actually live up to the words...About like wrapping a tird in a bow and calling it a Platinum Cherub.

I've had some wonderful women in my life and was damn happy to have them but never were they not humble about it and never did I want anything that I was doing seen as a gift either.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

It means one lives in deep appreciation for what they have and tend to be happy.