Seeking Sub/Slave need some help

Seeking Sub/Slave need some help (Full Version)

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autisticmaster -> Seeking Sub/Slave need some help (11/12/2010 4:11:49 PM)
See I had a account on this site before, but I felt that I made to many mistakes. So I dicided to close my account and start all over. Anyway I'm still having trouble getting any Sub/Slave to talk to me. I think the reason why is becuz I have trouble putting my thoughts and feelings on paper (message). So I end up putting a copy of my profile (with an edit here and there). So can anyone help me?

poise -> RE: Seeking Sub/Slave need some help (11/12/2010 4:33:56 PM)
Welcome back Alex. I know that you have been given an awful lot of advice just a few weeks past. http://www.collarchat.com/m_3415288/mpage_1/key_autism/tm.htm#3415534 If you are having trouble putting your thoughts and feelings on paper, relying on any of us to do so for you isn't going to help you acquire that skill. There are many Dominants on this site that have no trouble speaking their mind.... and I think it's fair to say they aren't always getting the girls falling over them either. What if we prepared a script for you and a submissive became interested? Would we then be asked to continue a dialogue for you? See where this is going? You can't play a part based on someone else's script. Stop pressuring yourself and be natural.

January -> RE: Seeking Sub/Slave need some help (11/12/2010 5:28:21 PM)
Alex, Who is the woman you have in your pictures? Is she okay with her pic being part of your marketing materials? Are you better at talking with people in person? If you are, munches and live events is probably the way to go. Do you have much experience in vanilla relationships? Given your age and disability, you might want to get some experience dating in a vanilla fashion before you launch into a D/s dynamic. January

lizi -> RE: Seeking Sub/Slave need some help (11/12/2010 5:41:18 PM)
Alex, you got so much good feedback the last time you started a thread on this. None of that advice had an expiration date on it. You can't keep relying on others to fix things for you, you really need to start making an effort on your own and sometimes it takes a while to get results. All you can do is keep trying and put your honest self out there to see if anyone is interested in finding out more about you. If they aren't then they aren't, you can't force it but you can keep trying and that should eventually get you somewhere...

lizi -> RE: Seeking Sub/Slave need some help (11/12/2010 5:53:22 PM)
I just saw the list of films in your profile...do you know the story of Cyrano de Bergerac? It's been written about and it's been in many films...one recent version had Steve Martin in it. Poise mentioned that it wouldn't be useful or fair to give you a script to use to land a woman...she's right. The story of Cyrano is about giving words to people who don't express themselves very well in order to get love, this approach fails because you have to get someone to care for you and want to be with you by showing them who you are, not by using the words of another. You can't land this sub woman that you want by using our words. You have to do it by letting them know what you are like. January had a good idea, since you have trouble with writing then how about if you tried meeting women in real life and then brought up BDSM later on? This might be a better approach for you and it bypasses the writing problem.

dory007 -> RE: Seeking Sub/Slave need some help (11/13/2010 8:49:02 AM)
go out and meet people in real life, join munch groups, go to demos, socials etc. don't write every sub on CM. find a profile that speaks to you and write to her about what you like in her profile. are you really autistic? if so then you probably need to work on social skills. you can find a group therapy to help learn. if you want to be a Dom/Master find one you admire and ask to be mentored. learn skills and safety to increase your self confidence and so women will want to play with you when they see you at a social. be polite, be respectful. look for a relationship and not a booty call. and on it goes. but as others have said YOU need to the work.

hausboy -> RE: Seeking Sub/Slave need some help (11/13/2010 12:24:48 PM)
Hi Alex I remember when you posted your profile question before, so kudos that you're still out there trying. One of the suggestions you were given by a few others were to use spell-check features--I know it may be a bit frustrating at times, but some women are very, very particular, so you can try typing your post response in a word document, spell-check it, then cut and paste it into your responses/emails. I know it takes time, but it's just one small thing that can help. Here's the other: I know it's tough, but you're still new here on CM (to be fair, so am I) and patience is the key. I joined....and email a few women who I thought I would be compatible with--no response by most--and after reading the posts on CM from women about why they don't respond, in some cases, I may have come across as someone coming on too strong--in other cases, well, maybe they just weren't looking for a guy like me. And that's okay too. Who knows? I don't. But I have begun to meet some really wonderful women on this site, and the email exchange has had little to do with BDSM--and more about other life issues. I see them as real people--and they can see that I'm one, too. I'm heading out to a munch on Monday--I enjoy human interaction much more than computer chatting. Be patient, and try to find a way that works for you. It just may take some time and effort on your part. The women aren't going to come to your doorstep just because you have a new profile. good luck, and don't lose hope

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